Chasing Cat
by shayla1462
Summary: Catherine is a single mom trying desperately to do right by her three year old girl, Lizzy. Sidney Crosby comes into their lives as the larger-than-life captain of the Pittsburgh Penguins who falls for little Lizzy. Will he fall for her mom too? If he does, will she let him catch her?
1. Chapter 1

It's my fault. I was smug with other moms, telling everyone that my daughter never went through the terrible twos. She never went through them. I was lucky. Ha, my luck expired now that my girl is three. Is there such a thing as the 'terrible threes' and, if so, does it last long?

Currently, my once pleasant two year old is now three years old and having a terrible tantrum. She's been crying her little heart out since Iceberg left the room. The event is finishing and we need to go but my little Lizzy doesn't care. She came here to see the 'pengun' and she wants to see the 'pengun.' In fact, neither of us knows anything about hockey. Lizzy saw a poster at the community centre and since then she's asked me every day when she gets to see the 'pengun.'

I learned that once a year, the Pittsburgh Penguins hockey team has a party for some of the kids at the community centre. It's mostly single parents, like me, who use the services at the centre and we always appreciate events like this for our kids. Of course, neither Lizzy nor I know anything about hockey. I don't think Lizzy even knows what hockey is but she's been so excited to see the Pen's mascot. Unfortunately, the afternoon has to end and the players and mascot have left. I tried to console her but Lizzy is in full tantrum and I've learned that you can only wait it out. While they are voracious, they usually don't last too long. I can only give the organizers an apologetic look as they wait for us to leave. We're the last ones left of course. I can just image what they are thinking about me as a parent. Thankfully, long ago I stopped caring what others think of me.

"Maybe this will help."

I turn when I hear a man's voice. The first thing I notice is how tall he is; although most people are taller than I am at 5"1'.

"Pengun" I hear Lizzy say and I notice the stuffed mascot in the man's hand.

He raises an eyebrow and asks "may I?"

I can only nod as continue to stare at him. He's gorgeous; beautiful eyes that could be green or brown, a slight curl in his dark chestnut hair and full, pink lips that make me yearn for them to touch mine. Wow, it's been a long time since I've thought that way. Oh my! As he walks to Lizzy and then crouches down in front of her, I'm stunned by how wide his shoulders are, waist narrow and, my oh my, that ass. Lizzy hiccups, which brings my attention back to her.

'Is this what you're looking for?" the man asks Lizzy.

Lizzy nods and reaches out for the stuffed Iceberg. The man hands it to her and she hugs the penguin to her then sits on the floor to look over him thoroughly. The man straightens and turns back to me.

"I don't know how to thank you" I say to him.

He smiles, one that reaches his eyes, and says "you're welcome. She certainly knows what she wants."

I chuckle and respond "yes and it was that penguin. She followed him around the whole time he was here but, when he left, she had a bit of a meltdown. She doesn't do it often but is very successful when she does."

He chuckles and we both look at Lizzy. She's currently kissing the stuffed animal and hugging him to her. I look back at the man and his smile knocks me out. Wow, he really packs a punch. I wonder if he is part of the staff here. He turns that smile up in wattage and I'm almost rocked back.

"Kids have meltdowns; it happens. I'm glad she's happy now."

We stand there simply staring at each other and smiling until it becomes weird. It's not uncomfortable; just weird. I'm standing here staring at a stranger while my daughter is kissing and hugging a stuffed animal. That thought brings my eyes back to Lizzy. I guess we really do need to leave since the place has emptied out. There's only a woman at the side of the room looking very impatient and talking on her phone. I look back at the man beside me and then it hits me: he doesn't work for the Pittsburgh Penguins, he is the Pittsburgh Penguins.

"Crosby" I whisper when I realize who he is although I realize that I say it out loud until I see him hold out his hand.

"Sidney" he says.

I stare at this hand for a few seconds before taking it in my own.

"Right. Sidney. I'm Catherine." I'm still surprised that I'm standing in front of the Penguins captain and star player when Lizzy squeals and says "izzy!"

I look down and Lizzy has attached herself to Sidney's leg as she grins up at him. He chuckles and crouches down in front of her.

"It's nice to meet you Lizzy. I'm Sidney."

Lizzy keeps smiling at him and replies "Sidwee." She's having trouble with the 'n' in his name. I hope he's ok with it. Sometimes people without kids try to correct them when they're wrong and I know Lizzy is still too close to her tantrum to take that well.

"You know Lizzy" Sidney begins. "My friends call me Sid."

Lizzy smiles at him and repeats "Sid." She manages his nickname well.

"Lizzy" I say and wait until she looks at me. "Thank Sid for the penguin."

She looks back at Sidney and, surprising him, throws her arms around his neck and says "thank you Sid." This is one of our lessons that has stuck at least; but, she has surprised me too when she hugs him. With ease, Sidney hugs her back and says "you're welcome Lizzy."

"Sid, I'm sorry to interrupt but we really do need to get you to the meeting." I look at the impatient woman as she says this to Sidney.

Sid stands up and turns to me. "I'm sorry, but I do need to get going. It was nice to meet you Catherine."

I feel a shiver when he says my name and find myself automatically saying "you too."

He looks down at Lizzy and says "take good care of Iceberg, Lizzy." He ruffles her hair and then heads to the door. After one last look and smile over his shoulder, he heads out the door with the woman and her phone.

I look down at my daughter and she is inspecting her penguin again. She looks so happy right now. It really was a great idea to come here today even if I had to take time from work. It's going to require some extra hours next week to make up the money lost today but her smile makes it totally worth it.

On the way home, all Lizzy can talk about is her new penguin and she shows it off to every new person who comes on the bus and sits near us. It's really cute and keeps her busy until it's our stop. The events of the day catch up with her when we get off at our stop and I need to carry her home. Thankfully our apartment is close to the stop.

When we get off the elevator at our floor, Lizzy wiggles out of my arms and runs down the hall to Miss Sally's door. Miss Sally has lived across the hall from us since Lizzy and I moved in. She's retired, has no family in the area and has taken to being a grandmother for Lizzy. Actually, Lizzy and I don't have any family either so I think we've all adopted each other. Miss Sally takes care of Lizzy when I'm working and I don't know how I'd be able to survive without her. With Miss Sally's help, I was able to get off of food stamps and welfare. I got a job and was able to provide a home for my daughter on my own.

When I found myself seventeen and pregnant, my foster family kicked me out. They weren't much of a family anyway but it was the most difficult time in my life. I snuck into a friend's house every night after her parents went to bed for a month before she went away to college. It took that entire month for me to decide to keep the baby. I was immediately going to have an abortion but something kept from doing it; same thing for adoption.

I saw a flyer for a program at the community centre that helps pregnant teens. By then I'd turned eighteen and didn't need to worry about running from the foster system anymore; but, I wanted to do everything on my own and didn't think that I needed anyone's help. I went to the program thinking that I could get some free stuff from them. The first thing they did was make an appointment for me with a doctor and that's when it happened; I heard the baby's heartbeat for the first time.

It's hard to describe, even to myself, what happened in that moment. I knew that I would do anything to keep my baby safe. My pride didn't matter. My independence didn't matter. All that mattered in the world was my baby. That program and the people who run it saved my life. More importantly, they helped me create my baby's healthy life. I got into public housing and financial support programs. They taught me to be healthy for the baby and how to take care of the baby when she did arrive.

It took me a year but I managed to get a job as a waitress and found my own apartment. As I watch Miss Sally and Lizzy together, I know how lucky I am to have found such a wonderful neighbour who has grown to be family. We say goodbye to Miss Sally and head into our own apartment. Lizzy goes to our room, it's only a one bedroom apartment, and I go into the kitchen. I have to make some meals for the next few days so it's easier to have dinner when I'm working. I hate for Miss Sally to have to cook as well as watch Lizzy. As I go about my task, the last thing on my mind is the Penguins captain and when our paths will cross again.

* * *

The event was fun as it usually is with kids. Yearly we have a party for some of the kids and their parents in the community. There are always a couple of kids who make you laugh and a couple that tug at your heart. One of the reasons I love doing these things is to remember the work I can do in the community of Pittsburgh that has been so good to me. I also do them for the fun. Too many of the obligations I have are tedious; but, the ones with kids are usually a great time.

I couldn't have predicted that a little girl would steal my heart this time. With her blond hair in pigtails and her big blue eyes filled with tears, her cries went straight to my heart. The PR guys were ushering us out when I heard the little girl cry "pengun!" Once in the hall, I had Jennifer run and get me a stuffed version of Iceberg and then I went back into the room. Thankfully everyone else had left and I was able to give the stuffed animal to the girl. Her smile and still wet eyes were beautiful.

I bring my attention back to the team meeting. Dan's right about our last game, the first game of the season and our home opener; it was a train wreck. I may have had a goal and an assist but I also did my share of fucking up. It's a shortened season and every game counts even more than usual. The lockout is over and we need to be better and fast. To have lost our home opener just makes it that much more painful.

As Granato takes over to talk about the PK, I let my mind wander again back to the kids; to one kid actually and definitely her mom. Catherine was a slightly bigger version of her daughter. She was almost a foot shorter than me and had the same blond hair and bright blue eyes of her daughter. There was something about both the mom and girl that made me want to gather them into my arms and protect them.

I turn my attention back to the meeting when Dan takes over again. We run more film from the last game and then the meeting ends. Most of us go to the locker room to change for working out. We had our on ice practice before the lunch party with the kids and now most of us will spend time in the gym. Before I change, I duck back out of the locker room and grab Jennifer.

"Jen, the mom and daughter I was talking to at the end of the party today, do you have their contact information?" I ask her.

"I can get it Sid" she responds.

"If I have room in my box for the Sunday afternoon game, can you make sure that they get tickets? I'd also like to ensure a visit from Iceberg for the kids."

Jennifer has been making notes as I talk and then looks up at me when she's finished.

"I can definitely get that done Sid."

I thank her and head back into the locker room. As I change into my workout gear, I think back over my short conversation with Catherine and Lizzy. I don't actually know if they like hockey. Hmm, I'm invited them to a hockey game and don't know if they like the game. I'll definitely have to make sure that Iceberg visits them. Maybe we can add some Iceberg stuff to the gift bags we give the kids. I'm not sure what's in them but I'm sure we can add stuff.

The workout goes by quickly, as it usually does, with the music blaring and the sound of weights banging. Today I'm focusing on core and back so lots of plyometrics and some weights. I'm one of the last ones out of the gym but there are lots of guys still in the lounge grabbing something to eat. I join them before grabbing a shower.

"Those kids were cute today" Duper says.

"Oh oh, does that mean number five might be on the way?" Kuni jokes.

"No way, four is enough for us; plus que suffisant" Duper replies.

"You were busy as usual Sid" Kuni says when he sees me come in the room.

I simply nod. They know that it usually takes me longer to do that kind of meet and greet thing. They also know that I won't say no to any kid and usually stay as long as the kids are there.

"What was that about with the whining little girl?" Despres asks me.

"She wasn't whining" I reply. "She was really upset that Iceberg left. She came to see the penguin and that didn't mean us."

The guys laugh. The guys with kids understand completely. I can see that the younger guys like Despres don't get it but won't argue the point. Fuck, when did I start thinking of them as 'younger guys?' Maybe it's just that I've been at this a lot longer than they have regardless of age. I've always had to do PR and media stuff for at least as long as I can remember. Long before Rimouski even, I was asked for autographs and had to talk to local media.

I hope that they come to the game on Sunday. A few years ago, I bought one of the boxes and use it for various kids' charities and groups in the community. I can't see them before the game and it's usually too late when I'm done after the game; but, they get to watch the game, are given dinner and snacks and receive those gift bags with toys, Penguins' stuff and gift cards to local stores. Maybe I'll see if Catherine and Lizzy want to come down to the locker room after the game. We could get Lizzy a kid sized jersey and sign it for her.

Huh. I don't think that I've ever taken this much of an interest in a kid from one of those events but this little girl has stayed in my head. I can see those big blue eyes and how cute she sounded when she tried to say my name. I liked being able to make her smile too. Yeah, I'm definitely going to have passes ready for them to come down to the locker room after the game. Hopefully the little one won't be too disappointed that Iceberg won't be there and all she gets to see is me.


	2. Chapter 2

Wow. Ok. This is weird. I just got off the phone with the program lead at the community centre and the Penguins have invited Lizzy and I to their game on Sunday. Apparently they have a special box where they do stuff for the kids in addition to watching the game. I was worried about being at the game with a three year old and keeping her busy as well as away from drunken fans. The box seems like a great idea and, if we can keep Iceberg within our sightline, it should be a lot of fun for Lizzy.

Ug, we need to be at the game for 4pm which means that I have to get off work early, pick up Lizzy and catch the 3:30pm bus. It's going to be very, very tight but I can probably make it happen. I've done more difficult schedules.

"Cat, your order's up."

Tessa calls to me from the kitchen. I shake myself out of organizing hell and go to the pass to get my order. At least working at the diner keeps me busy all day and the hours go by quickly. We do an all-day breakfast that the locals love in this neighbourhood. My shift starts at 6am but I'm done by 5pm so I have time with Lizzy before she goes to bed and we can usually have dinner together too. The days are very long and all on my feet. I'm thankful for a job and that it isn't the horrible shifts that most waitress jobs require. I do have to work some weekends but it doesn't matter to me. This is a family owned and run diner and most of the patrons are regulars which provide a steady clientele. My shifts are regular and never get cut back so I can count on being able to pay my rent each month.

The morning goes by quickly and my lunch break is on me before I realize it. As I come back from lunch and head through the kitchen to take over my tables, Tessa catches me. Tessa is the mom of the owner family and is determined to get me married. It's really cute actually. She is always putting men in my section and talking me up to them.

"You can thank me later Cat." Tessa tells me.

Oh God, what has she done? "What will I be able to thank you for later Tess?"

"I just sat five of the hottest young men I've ever seen in your section. Two are wearing a wedding ring but the others aren't. Three, Cat, you have your choice of three of them."

Tessa winks at me and continues into the kitchen. I mentally roll my eyes as I put on my apron. At least I should have some fun flirting. Regardless of Tessa's age and insistent need to see me married, she is an excellent judge of attractive men.

I see where Tessa has sat the guys when I enter the dining room. I walk up and give them my best smile; the one that is designed to get big tips.

"Hi guys, what can I get you all to drink while you look at the menu?" I say and glance around the table.

I'm stopped cold when I see a familiar face. Sidney Crosby is not only in the diner but he's sitting in my section and smiling widely back at me.

Before either of us can say anything, Tessa walks beside me and gives my shoulder a squeeze while saying "see boys. I told you that Cat would take good care of you" and then she walks away.

"Cat?" Sidney asks me.

"Yes, Sid" I reply back and smile broadly at him. I guess if fate has decided to put this beautiful man in front of me again then the least that I can do is flirt with him.

"I guess that's short for Catherine, huh?" he asks me.

"Sure is. Good to see you again." I glance at the whole table again and ask "what can I get you guys to drink?"

A guy across from Sid, asks him in a French accent "aren't you going to introduce us to your friend Sid?"

The French guy is smiling so wide that his teeth seem at risk of falling out of his mouth. He has warm brown eyes that are sparkling with humour.

I turn back to Sid and say "yeah Sid, aren't you going to introduce me?"

Sid looks slightly embarrassed for a moment but then lifts a shoulder and says "sure."

He looks at his friends and says "everyone, this is Catherine, or Cat as I've learned today. She and her daughter Lizzy were at the kids' party we had at Consol yesterday."

I notice a few of the guys nodding and one or two have a sad look in their eyes. Those are the ones who remember that the party was for 'under-served' community families. I've seen that look before and know that, even if it's misplaced, it isn't meant in a malicious way.

"Yes guys, it was my daughter who had the meltdown when Iceberg left the room." I tell them and they all chuckle.

"Duper here has four kids; he didn't even notice because that's the only sound he hears in his house" the red headed guy says as he punches a guy in the arm who must be 'Duper.'

"I'm Pascal" 'Duper' says to me.

Sid picks up the rest of the introductions. "That's Paul, Kris and Marc" he says as he points to each guy. I'm noticing a similarity amongst them; a physical similarity.

"You all play for the Penguins?" I ask them.

"No matter what everyone may think, the captain can't do it all alone" the one named Kris says in a French accent. Wow, he certainly packs a punch. Between the beautiful face, long hair, deep brown eyes and French accent, I feel a definite pull. Are all hockey players this gorgeous? It looks like I'm going to have my hands full with these guys and I intend to enjoy every moment of it.

"Ok guys, you have one last chance. Coffee, water, juice? What's your poison?" I ask them with a saucy smile.

* * *

I watch Cat walk away with our drink order and admire her ass in the tight black leggings. How come I didn't notice that the last time I saw her?

"You talked about the kid. How come you didn't tell us how hot the mom is? Fuck Sid, trying to keep her all for yourself?" Paulie asks.

I look back at the table and all of the guys are looking at me laughing.

"Ha ha Paulie. You're a funny guy."

We all stop talking when Cat comes back with our drinks and then takes our food orders. This time, as she walks away, we are all watching her. Seriously, how come I didn't notice that that other day?

"Elle est une belle fille" Tanger says. I wholeheartedly agree.

Talk turns to the game against Winnipeg tomorrow. We really want to win this one since they're coming into our rink and we did lose the opener.

"Turnovers in the neutral zone killed us. It's sloppy play. We hung you out to dry Flower" Duper says.

Flower shrugs and replies "ok, but I didn't help on the PK."

We all get really quiet so I say "so, we need to control the puck better, make smarter passes and get Flower either a bigger glove or pads."

The guys all laugh as I hoped they would. We can easily spiral during a shortened season when every game matters. Both Geno and I let our tempers get the best of us at the end of the last game earning a game misconduct for each of us. We need to do better; I need to do better.

When our food arrives, there is a lot of laughing and joking from both the guys and Cat. She was so worried about Lizzy the other day that I really didn't get to see her humour and, how when she laughs, her blue eyes sparkle. As we eat our food, I find my eyes following her around the diner. She stops to talk with a couple who must be regulars because the woman hugs Cat. A group of elderly ladies wave to her as they come in and she waves back. Part of me is jealous because she seems to be this friendly and outgoing with everyone when I thought it was just for me. Wow, when did my ego get so big? I must be crazy thinking this way. Although I am happy that Paulie suggested we try this diner and I may find myself back here again.

* * *

Sid and his friends, team mates I guess, were a lot of fun. They played rock, paper, scissors to see who would pay for their meal. Marc, the one that they call Flower, lost out but I was grateful when I saw the big tip he left me. The guys all left and I bussed their table. Not a speck of food was left on their plates. I guess professional athletes have big appetites.

When I come back into the dining room, I see that Sid has come back into the diner and he smiles shyly when my eyes catch his. After checking on a table, I move to the door to where Sid is waiting.

"Hi" I say.

"Hi" he replies.

I wait him out. He must want something.

"Um, Cat, I don't know if anyone has called you yet but, um, I have a box that I usually fill with kids from the community. I asked the PR staff to contact you and see if you wanted to come; with Lizzy."

Oh, it wasn't the Penguins, it was Sid. I can't help smiling at him. He really is a very sweet man.

"Yes, I received the call this morning. We've never been to a hockey game before and it should be a lot of fun. We do need to make sure that Lizzy gets to see Iceberg. I imagine he runs around the arena during the game so she can watch him, right?"

Sid smiles at me "he does. We might be able to do better than that though. I'm glad you're coming."

As Sid turns toward the door, and before I can think about it, I touch his arm. When I feel the huge bicep, my mind turns completely blank and I forget what I was going to say. Sid looks from my hand to my eyes and tilts his head. What the hell was I going to say? Oh yeah.

"Um, thank you Sid. I really appreciate what you're doing for us."

Sid smiles again and covers my hand, still on his arm, with his own. The warmth radiates into my hand and up my arm. I'm still trying to identify what I'm feeling when Sid nods and leaves. Wow. This guy really packs a punch. No wonder he's the captain of the team. Now I'm really looking forward to seeing how he plays.

The rest of the day goes by quickly and I don't have too much time to think about Sid and the Penguins. I manage to get out on time and make my buses. When I enter my apartment, I hear Lizzy giggling and my heart melts. No matter what happens during the day or how tired I am, all I need to hear is my little girl's giggle and everything is right in the world.

"Mommy!" Lizzy yells and launches herself into my arms. I hold her close and breath her in. It's a mixture of crayons and talc powder and smells like home.

"How was your day my little Lizzy?"

Lizzy giggles and proceeds to tell me everything that she and Miss Sally had done all day. It takes the entire time that I hang up my coat, greet Miss Sally, wash up and change. Lizzy finally winds down as I help put our dinner on the table. The three of us eat and chat. It isn't until we're almost done dinner when I remember the offer to see a Penguin's game.

"Lizzy, how would you like to go and see a hockey game?"

She frowns at me and I realize that she doesn't know what hockey is so she doesn't understand. I don't know that I'm the one to explain it to her.

"Remember when we saw the penguin the other day?"

That makes sense to her and she runs to get her Iceberg stuffed animal.

"Pengun!" she shouts out as she runs back and holds him up to me.

"Yes sweetheart, the penguin. Would you like to see the penguin again?"

Now Lizzy starts jumping up and down shouting "pengun, pengun!" I guess that's a 'yes' and we're going to a hockey game.

Miss Sally leaves after dinner and Lizzy and I begin our bedtime routine. First is her bath, with bubbles, and she plays with some of her tub toys. There were a few tense moments when I told her that she couldn't take the penguin into the tub but she was satisfied knowing that she could have him in bed.

After she's dried and in her pajamas, she chooses a book to read and we curl up in her bed to read it. The book is one of her favourites and features Elmo. When it's done, she tucks in and I kiss her as she quickly falls asleep. I stay where I am beside her and watch her sleep. She's so beautiful and I can't believe I made her. She's becoming a sweet, kind and loving little girl. I feel so lucky to be her mom. It wasn't always that way. In fact, when I was pregnant, I doubted myself constantly about being able to do this well.

I look around the room and see my bed in the corner and the second hand dresser. We may not have much; but, my daughter is happy and healthy. My mind drifts back to the players at the diner today. I bet none of them have to think about their next paycheque or if they can pay their rent. It is wonderful to see how players like Sidney Crosby believe in giving to the community with his wealth. That makes me wonder.

I go to my computer and enter his name in Google. Holy shit! There are over twelve million results. I add the words 'kid' and 'charity' to the search and I see that he has his own children's charity foundation. He also does a lot of stuff with the Penguins too. He does small things like visiting with kids through Make a Wish and big things like outfitting hundreds of kids in Pittsburgh with hockey equipment so that they can play. Wow, he even does things back in his home town like creating a teen lounge in a hospital. The room has a pool table, air hockey table, big-screen TV, video games, a reading nook, and a kitchen. Wow, that's a lot for the kids and their families. It's so different from the rest of the hospital and so needed by them.

I can't help myself and I look at the images of him. He truly is a beautiful man. I love the pictures when he smiles but doesn't seem to know that his picture is being taken. It seems so much more natural. Hmm, there are a lot of pictures of him when he's out doing things like having dinner with friends or shopping. It must be difficult not to have privacy.

My eyes are getting really heavy and I realize that I've been at the computer for an hour. I'm exhausted and need to be up at 5am tomorrow. I have to remember to ask for the time to go to the hockey game. Lizzy will love seeing the penguin again. I think that I'm looking forward to seeing a different penguin than Lizzy.


	3. Chapter 3

I am really running late. Tessa gave me the time off for the game, and is letting me work a double tomorrow to make up the pay, but I missed my connecting transfer. The asshole bus driver saw me but didn't stop. Dick!

So I've been walking for 20 minutes now to get home and pick up Lizzy for the hockey game. I called Miss Sally and she'll have Lizzy ready when I get there. I won't have time to change or wash up so my black yoga pants, black tee shirt and no make-up is going to have to do.

I walk in the door 30 minutes late so I grab the diaper bag, we're still working on potty training, and Lizzy then we're out the door. She insisted on bringing her 'pengun' with her. It's so cute. She chatters all the way to the arena. Neither of us knows what to expect and I didn't tell her about Iceberg being there at the game. I should have known that my smart little girl would recognize where we just were a few days ago as we walk up to the arena.

"Pengun, pengun, pengun!" Lizzy shouts out and jumps up and down in her pink shoes.

"Mommy, mommy, pengun!" She shouts and points to the arena. My smart girl remembers when were last here and she's definitely excited in anticipation of seeing Iceberg.

"Yes sweetie, this is where we saw the penguin. We'll see if we can find him again tonight."

I'm worried that she won't get to touch or hug him and I really don't want her to be disappointed. I guess I can't change that and that's the hardest thing about being a parent. I want to always make her happy and prevent any potential pain or disappointment. It's easier to do when they're babies but, now, it's getting harder. Lizzy is so smart and she is very curious. I dread the day when she asks me about her daddy. I wish I could protect her from that pain.

We go to the main entrance and a woman in a Penguins polo shirt approaches us.

"Are you Catherine?" she asks me.

"Yes I am" I answer.

The woman turns to Lizzy and says "and you must be Lizzy."

Lizzy smiles, holds up her Iceberg and says "pengun!"

The woman chuckles and says "yes, you're going to see a lot of penguins today." She turns to me and says "I'm Jennifer and I'll show you to your box. Will you follow me?"

I nod and take Lizzy's hand. We follow Jennifer through a hallway to an elevator and then travel up. When the doors open, Jennifer leads us down another hall and then through a door. When we enter the room, I stop in my tracks. The entire arena appears in front of us. It's huge and filling with fans. Music is playing. I look around the room and see other kids and parents. Everyone is laughing and having fun. Jennifer turns to us.

"Sidney has a few gifts for you." She opens a bag. "Here is a Crosby jersey for you." When Lizzy looks at it and doesn't move, I take it from Jennifer.

"Would you like to put this on Lizzy?" I ask her and she nods shyly. After the jersey is on, Lizzy looks down at her new shirt. It's hanging down to her knees and she looks so cute. She looks up at me with a big grin and points to her chest.

"Pengun mommy."

I chuckle and reply "yes sweetie, there's a penguin on your shirt."

Lizzy turns around to look at room and I notice that Sid has signed the shirt. That is so nice of him to do. It's probably worth a lot of money. I hope that people don't sell it. I know that we'll cherish ours.

"Cat" Jennifer says and I turn back to her. "There are some additional items here for Lizzy. Sid made a special request that Iceberg sign something for her so we have a poster. Sid also asked us to find a larger stuff Iceberg which we'll have for you after the game."

Wow, I'm really touched that Sid took such care in making sure that Lizzy was taken care of; it is very sweet.

"Thank you Jennifer. We'll wait here after the game for you."

She nods and leaves the room. I look back to Lizzy and she's standing at the edge of the room where the stands begin staring at the arena. I walk to her and look down at her face. Her eyes are huge saucers and dart around trying to take everything in. When I look out, I'm just as overwhelmed as she is with the view. We are way up high and have a great view of the arena. It's already filling with fans. The clock is counting down, I guess to game time. There is energy in the place that's infectious and I feel myself getting excited. When Lizzy leans into me, I can feel her excitement as well. Looking at her sight line, I don't think she can see the ice and the full arena so I take her hand and lead her down to the stands. It seems that every box has seats in front of it so that you can sit in the stands too. I pull Lizzy onto my lap as I sit.

"What do you think Lizzy?" I ask her but she doesn't respond. She's leaning forward and her head swivels back and forth trying to take everything in. I thought she might be bored but she's enthralled, for now at least.

"Excuse me" I hear and turn to see an attendant. "You might want to bring Lizzy back up. Mr. Crosby has arranged a special surprise."

I nod and pick Lizzy up in my arms. I notice that all of the parents and kids have been gathered in one area of the box and all seem to be waiting.

The attendant looks at her phone and then goes to the door. When she opens it, the room goes crazy; it's Iceberg. Lizzy almost jumps out of my arms and it's only my quick reflexes that keep her from falling on her face. When she's down, she goes running to the mascot and throws her arms around his leg. The other kids, all boys, are excited but not nearly as much as my daughter.

"Pengun, pengun, pengun" Lizzy shouts as she squeezes the mascot and jumps up and down.

"Lizzy, careful" I tell her. I'm afraid Iceberg will fall over with her enthusiasm.

"She's ok" the attendant says and Iceberg nods.

Iceberg then bends down so that he's at Lizzy's level and throws out his arms, or I guess they're wings, and Lizzy hugs him. I pull out my phone to take pictures. It is just such a sweet scene. I feel my eyes tear up. I'm always worried about Lizzie missing out on things because we don't have much money or she doesn't have a father. I'm so grateful to the Penguins and Sidney for doing this for my little girl.

Iceberg stands up and moves to the other kids. I can tell that Lizzie is about to react to losing her 'pengun' so I quickly intervene.

"Lizzie, let's get something to eat. You can visit with the penguin more." As this comes out of my mouth, I am hoping that it's the truth and that she'll get to see Iceberg again or else it's going to be a difficult afternoon. As I watch Lizzy make up her mind about a meltdown or food, a cheer goes up from the crowd and Lizzy turns to the arena. We both move toward the stands at the same time. I help Lizzy down the stairs so that we can watch the players come onto the ice. I find myself looking for Sidney to come out. He finally does and the crowd cheers even louder. Lizzy starts clapping and jumping up and down.

During the game, Lizzy stays focused on the players and, occasionally, Iceberg. At one point, Sid's face is shown in close up on the jumbotron. Lizzy notices and begins jumping up and down again.

Pointing at Sid's face, she turns to me and shouts "Sidwee, mommy, Sidwee."

"Yes sweetheart, it's Sidney."

She smiles widely, clasps her hand and stares back at the ice. I'm watching her more than the game. I never thought that she would sit this long. Of course, when I'm watching the game, my eyes are drawn to Sid. He moves so fast and the fans cheers every time he has the puck. I don't know hockey but I can tell that Sid is very special. Looking at Lizzy again, I know that he's special both on and off the ice. He's made my daughter so very happy today and he doesn't even know how much it means to us. I hope I get the chance to thank him.

The game ends in a tie and they play overtime. No one wins during overtime so they go into a short out. It's very exciting and we both cheer loudly when the Penguins win. Everyone in the box packs up and heads out after the game but we hang back and wait as the attendant asked us to do. Lizzy starts getting restless because it's been a long afternoon for her and a very exciting one too. I hold her in my arms and she drifts off for a little while until the attendant comes for us.

"Hi there, how was the game?" she asks us.

"Lizzy loved it. You can see that she's tuckered out. It was wonderful and we're both so grateful. Thank you" I reply.

"We have one last surprise for you. I'll need you both to wear these."

She holds out lanyards with a pass on them that has the Penguins' logo. I put one on Lizzy who wakes up and begins to inspect it. We then leave the box and follow the attendant. She takes us down a few hallways and then an elevator. Lizzy is completely awake now and curious about her surroundings. When we get off the elevator, there are another couple of hallways until it opens into a large room. It looks like a lounge with comfy chairs, a foosball table, air hockey table and a kitchenette. There are Penguin logos everywhere and a few people milling around. The attendant asks us to wait by the chairs and then leaves the room. We sit down to wait.

"Cat?" I hear behind me. When I turn around, it's one of the guys from the diner. He looks like he just had a shower. Marc? No. Oh yeah ...

"Hi Pascal. Congratulations on the win. It was a great game."

Pascal sits down beside us.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it" he says and then turns to Lizzy. "And you must be Lizzy. Did you enjoy the game?"

Lizzy nods but is a little shy. I don't think she's ever met this many new people at once. She's also a little shy around men.

"Did you get to see Iceberg?" Pascal asks her. She doesn't understand him so I mouth 'penguin' to Pascal and he understands. "Did you get to see the penguin Lizzy?" he asks her.

This has her nodding and smiling and Pascal chuckles at her enthusiasm. I notice that he looks over my shoulder then says "I think we have another surprise for you."

When both Lizzy and I look behind us, we see that Iceberg is there. He opens his arms wide and Lizzy is off my lap and running for a penguin hug immediately. I may have to ask Iceberg to come home with us.

"I guess she's enjoying herself" I hear behind me. It isn't Pascal and, when I turn around, I confirm that it's Sidney Crosby.

He also looks fresh from a shower but is wearing a suit. His shoulders look impossibly wide, his waist narrow and those lips, wow, are smiling broadly at me. Oh boy!

When I walked into the lounge, the first thing I noticed was the adorable pixie Lizzy giving Iceberg a huge hug. She looks so cute and happy that I feel the smile on my face instantly break out. I then notice Cat in front of me. She is wearing exactly what I saw her in at work; form fitting black yoga pants and a black shirt. I hear a giggle and my attention is drawn back to Lizzy.

"I guess she's enjoying herself" I find myself saying and Cat turns around to look at me. I feel my smile get wider as Cat gives me one of her own.

"She is. We both are Sid. Thank you so much for, well, everything. It is very kind of you and will be a lifelong memory for her" Cat replies.

I hate it when people thank me. I know it's polite, and nice of them, as well as heart felt; but, it makes me very, very uncomfortable. There's not really much that I do except spend a few minutes, dollars and ask the Pens staff to make arrangements.

"You're welcome Cat. I'm so glad that she's enjoying herself. Iceberg is a big hit."

Cat turns to look at her daughter and then back at me. She bites her lip and suddenly looks uncomfortable.

"Um, Sid, she's three years old. She doesn't really understand hockey or that you're the captain of the team. She doesn't realize how fortunate we are that you've done this for us." Cat looks at me apologetically now and I finally get it.

"Cat, I hope that you don't think I'm looking for accolades or anything. I know that she's three years old and that Iceberg is the big draw for her. In fact, I think it's adorable and a good idea. Any given game, we can win or lose but Iceberg always wins. I'd idolize him too." That makes her chuckle and I'm rewarded with a smile again.

"Sidwee!" I look up just as Lizzy launches herself at me and I catch her. She gives me a hug and clings to my neck. I'm taken completely by surprise by the hug. I'm even more surprised by how right it feels when I hug her back. It feels natural to have this blond hair, blue eyed pixie in my arms. "Sidwee" she says again and then leans back so that she can look at me. Each of her small hands takes one of my cheeks so that she can look directly at me.

"Hi Lizzy" I say. She smiles again then lays her cheek on my shoulder and cuddles in.

"I can take her" Cat says.

To my surprise, I answer "if you don't mind, I'm ok holding her."

Cat smiles at my words and nods; I find myself staring at the full grown version of the pixie in my arms. What is it about them that draws me in? It's different than most fans. It could be because they aren't fans; at least of mine.

Iceberg comes over and gives Lizzy a kiss with his 'bill' and then waves goodbye as the attendant leads him out. He doesn't usually do extra stuff like this so I'll remember to thank him later.

"Looks like someone is tired" Cat says and I look down to see that Lizzy is yawning and, after resting her head on my shoulder again, closes her eyes.

"I can take her" Cat continues.

"It's ok. Why don't I walk you to your car?" I reply.

"Actually, we took the bus so I only have to go to the corner to catch it." Cat tells me.

I don't know which of us is more surprised when I say "I can give you a drive home." Where did that come from?

Cat looks surprised and then uncomfortable and I feel like an ass. A single woman, with a child, would naturally be uncomfortable if a man she's only met a few times offers to drive her home. She probably thinks I'm after some 'repayment' for the tickets and stuff.

"I'm sorry Cat. That was inappropriate. It's probably late for her so let me arrange a cab for you. The Pens will take care of it." I know it will be me and not the Pens but I don't want her to feel any weirder about it.

I can see Cat's thoughts clearly on her face. She looks from me to Lizzy and then back to me again. I can tell that she doesn't want to accept the help but Lizzy is clearly asleep in my arms now.

"I'd appreciate that Sid. Thank you." She says this with a shy smile. Interesting. Although I haven't known her long, she's always been incredibly confident and this shyness is very interesting.

I gesture for her to follow me while I look for someone from the office staff. Jennifer is down the hall and comes directly to us.

"Hi Sid. Hi Cat. Looks like Lizzy is tuckered out, huh?" Jennifer says.

"Yeah Jen. Can you arrange for a cab to take them home please?" I ask her.

I can tell that she understands me and knows we're paying for it.

"Sure I can Sid. Cat, why don't you follow me and we'll get that cab for you?" Jennifer asks Cat.

They both look at me and I'm confused for a moment. Then it occurs to me that I'm still holding Lizzy. I smile and transfer the little girl to Cat's arms. Lizzy doesn't wake up. Hmm, I feel odd watching Cat and Lizzy leaving with Jennifer. It's like I miss them and they aren't even gone.

Cat turns around and says "thank you so much Sid. This has been an incredible experience for us both."

"You're welcome Cat. I hope I'll see you again soon" I tell her. Where the fuck did that come from and how will she react?

Again she looks shy, bites her bottom lip, then says "I'd like that Sid" before she quickly turns to follow Jennifer down the hall.

I'm left staring after her. She'd like to see me again? That's as unexpected as my saying it to her first.

I head back to the lounge and find Pascal leaving the locker room.

"Sid, you're right. That kid is cute" he tells me.

I also hear the unspoken question that he's wondering about my interest in her mom; but, I don't know how to respond so I ignore it.

"Yeah, she's cute" I reply and we walk together in silence to the car park, where we part.

I pause on the drive out to sign a few autographs and then continue home. I still haven't completed the renovation but I have moved in to my new house. This will be the first full season that I've lived away from the Lemieux's. It's odd but I like having my own space and it was time. They were incredible to me but it really is good to be on my own.

As I drive home, I call my dad as I usually do. He answers on the third ring.

"Congratulations son. It was a great game" dad tells me.

"Thanks dad. We got away from good D in the second which is when they tied it. Granato's going to have a lot to say about that at practice tomorrow I'm sure. We won the game in the shoot-out but that's not the way we want to win of course."

"Yeah I know" dad tells me.

We talk further about the game until I arrive home.

"Tell mom I say hi. I'm pulling up at home now. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Ok, good night Sid."

"Nite dad" I say back as I pull into my garage.

I go directly to my bedroom to change out of my suit. There are a few games on tonight that I want to watch so I said no when a few guys asked if I wanted to grab something to eat after the game.

As I settle onto the sofa and turn on the TV, I think back over our game and am still pissed that it went to a shoot-out. We should have won that one in regular time. My mind drifts to Lizzy and Cat. It was great to see how much Lizzy enjoyed the game and so cute to see her in my jersey. Shit! I forgot to give her the large stuffed Iceberg. I didn't want to have it waiting in the box for her since the other kids weren't getting one and then I completely forgot after the game. Hmm, maybe I'll have to go by the diner and drop it off to Cat.


	4. Chapter 4

**_Author's Note: work has been absolutely crazy; beyond crazy actually. I will try to do better with the updates. Thank you for reading._**

* * *

I hate working doubles. Eighteen hours on my feet makes me very grumpy and very tired. The day is over, thank God. I'm just turning the 'open' window sign to 'closed' when I hear the door open. Prepared to tell the customers that we're closed, the words and all thought leave my head when I see Sid walk through the door.

"Hi" he says and smiles.

"Hi" I reply.

"Cat" I hear Tessa say behind me. "I can finish up. Why don't you go home? You have to be exhausted."

I look behind me and I know she's seen Sid. She's trying to play matchmaker again. It's interesting that I really don't mind.

"Thanks Tess" I reply and then look back to Sid.

I stare at him for a few moments. My mind is going back and forth; should I ask him if he wants to have a cup of coffee somewhere? I actually don't know what he's doing here so maybe I shouldn't jump to conclusions. It's getting weird now because we're just looking at each other.

"Do you want to grab a coffee?" Sid asks me.

To say I'm surprised is an understatement. Not only has Sid come to the diner but he's also inviting me out. Does that make it a date? Is he asking me out on a date? Do I want to go out with him? The answers go through my head just as quickly as the questions: I think so; I really hope so; and, hell yeah.

"Sure Sid" I reply.

Sid looks as surprised as I am but quickly replies "great."

"Just give me a minute to grab my stuff" I tell him and go back to the kitchen. Tessa grabs me as soon as I enter.

"Did I hear him? Did he just ask you out Cat? Hot damn kid."

I chuckle at her and reply "yes he did and yes I'm going. Don't read too much into it, ok? He could just be being nice."

"Cat, men don't ask you out for a coffee to be nice. He's interested in you. Please take my advice and get to know him better. Have some fun Cat. You don't have nearly enough fun in your life."

I sigh, she's right of course. Maybe I should just go with it and enjoy a coffee with a gorgeous man.

"Alright, fine Tessa. I'll have some fun tonight" I tell her. I take a moment to make a quick call to Miss Sally to say I'll be late then head back out to the dining room with my bag and jacket.

I hear Tessa call after me "good girl" and I'm chuckling as I walk up to Sid.

"What's so funny?" He asks me.

"Tessa just said something funny to me. Ready to go?" I ask him as I put my jacket on. Sid steps behind me and helps me with my jacket. As I zip it up, he pulls my pony tail out of the collar and I feel his fingers brush across my bare neck. I shiver involuntarily and can feel him close to me. Wow, I haven't felt this in a very long time. I turn back to Sid and he's smiling at me.

"Definitely, my car is out front" he tells me.

I love how he opens the door for me to walk out of the diner ahead of him. Then he opens the door to his truck too. After starting the engine, he turns to me.

"Do you have a favourite place?" he asks me.

I think about it for a minute. If we go to a chain place then he'll probably be recognized. I don't know a local place for coffee where Sidney Crosby could be anonymous. Usually I would suggest the diner but I just left work and it's closed. There's really no place that I know of that will be private.

"I don't know of a place that won't have lots of people" I tell him.

He frowns now. I guess he can't think of one either. I decide to take a chance.

"How about we go to my place?" Oh God did I really just ask him that, seriously? "It's not much but I can guarantee there won't be any fans."

"Right" he says "Lizzy is a fan of Iceberg not me."

I see that he's kidding so I laugh.

"Are you sure?" he continues.

With some men, they might take it as my invited them for sex. I don't know why but I instinctively know that Sid is different.

"Yeah" I say. "Lizzy will be asleep and I make really good coffee."

He chuckles now, as I hoped he would.

"Ok then, which way?" He asks.

I point him in the right direction and he pulls into the street.

"One thing though Cat."

I look at his profile and ask "yeah?"

"I don't drink coffee" he confesses in an apologetic tone. It makes me laugh.

"That's ok" I tell him. "I have other things too."

Sid chuckles and then asks me about my day. It seems so natural and comfortable. I tell him about some of my more colourful customers. We arrive at my apartment quickly or maybe it feels quick because I didn't have to take two buses.

Sid parks on the street and then we head into the building. As we walk through it, I notice how old the building is and the sounds and smells of other tenants. As this thought goes through my head, I quickly glance at Sid expecting him to look, I don't know. Maybe I expected him to turn up his nose at the 'low rent' building but Sid simply smiles at me and holds the door open for me when we enter my apartment.

Miss Sally is asleep on the sofa with the TV on. Sid looks at me.

"That is Miss Sally. She lives across the hall and helps me with Lizzy" I tell him.

Sid smiles as he takes off his jacket. I take it from him and hang it on the coat rack with my own. When I turn back to him, Sid is taking off his shoes and moves into the kitchen area. I go to Miss Sally and gently shake her awake.

"Cat, I must have drifted off" she tells me as she sits up. I know the exact moment when she sees Sid.

I move back and say "Miss Sally this is Sidney. Sid, meet Miss Sally."

Sid comes over to us and shakes Miss Sally's hand.

"It's nice to meet you Miss Sally" Sid says to her.

"And you as well Sidney. You were great in the last game" she tells him.

"Miss Sally is a big sports fan" I tell him.

Sid smiles widely and says "thank you Miss Sally. Have you been to a game?"

"Oh yes I have but it was long before you joined the team Sid. I was there during the Cup season in '92."

"That was a great season. You were lucky to see it" Sid replies.

"Well, I need to get my old bones homes. You don't keep this girl up too late Sid. She worked a double shift today."

I walk Miss Sally to the door and she whispers to me "but you don't need to go to bed too early."

I chuckle and kiss her cheek before shutting the door behind her. When I turn back to Sid, he is frowning and asks "how long is a double shift?"

I walk to the kitchen and answer him. "My regular shift is eight hours."

"So you worked sixteen hours today?" He asks me.

I shrug and reply "yeah. To get most of Sunday off for the game, I needed to work a double today. It happens sometimes."

I look back at Sid and he is simply looking back at me. His expression is hard to read.

"Let me put some coffee on. As I said, I make really great coffee." I say and try to lighten the mood. "Oh right, you don't drink coffee. Let me see what else I have."

"Water is fine" Sid tells me as my face is buried in the fridge.

Yikes, I don't have anything really to offer a 'guest.' There are Lizzy juice boxes, milk and orange juice. Soda is really bad for kids so I stopped buying it when Lizzy was born. I don't have any beer or wine because I don't have people over. All my friends are through the mommy group at the Centre so we mostly get together for play dates. "Well Sid, looks like I have a typical child friendly fridge. There's milk and orange juice" I tell him.

When I turn, Sid is right behind me which I didn't anticipate. I bump directly into him and he grabs my arms so that I don't bounce back into the fridge. We're staring at each other now and I'm acutely aware that my hands are on his chest. That chest is very hard and warm under my hands. Sid and I both look down at my hands, back at each other and then Sid jumps back.

"Um, orange juice is great, thanks" he says and then turns back to walk to the living room area.

I get two glasses and pour us each some orange juice before joining Sid at the sofa. After handing him a glass, I sit beside him. That's when it hits me: I'm sitting on the sofa beside the best hockey player in the world. What do we have in common? What are we going to talk about? I didn't even know this man a week ago and now I'm sitting on the sofa behind him. Damn, I never should Googled him; especially how much his contract is worth; 100 million dollars. What the hell is that about? Oh my God, what am I going to say?

"Is everything ok Cat?" He asks me.

"Yeah, um ..." what the hell do I say now?

"Would you like me to go?" he asks me softly.

My eyes go directly to his. "No Sid, no."

"But something is off" he begins and waits for me.

"Ok, this is really weird but I Googled you and ..." I can't tell him the rest.

"You Googled me" he says softly again.

"Yeah, and before that you were just Sid; a great guy you has done some really great things for me and my daughter. After I Googled you, I learned that you're Sidney Crosby." I know that I'm doing a poor job of describing what I mean.

Sid gets up and says "I understand" then walks toward the door.

"Where are you going?" I ask him.

He turns to me and replies "aren't you saying that you want me to go?"

I smile at him then pat the seat next to me

"No Sid. You asked me what was going on and I'm telling you. It's weird; really weird. You just signed a contract for 100 million dollars. One hundred dollars is a big deal to me; I can't fathom millions. You are everywhere on the internet. I mean, you don't even need to put your name in Google. You just have to say hockey player and your name will quickly come up. It's not bad; it's just weird." I finally finish and say a silent prayer that he understands my rambling.

Finally, after what seems like forever, Sid sits back down beside me.

"So you Googled me huh?" He says and I can tell that he's teasing me.

"Yeah, I did. I wasn't joking Sid. I know nothing about hockey. In fact, the past three, almost four years, have been spent on working and Lizzy."

Sid smiles and his hand reaches to grasp mine. It feels very warm as he slightly squeezes.

"I think it's incredible, you're incredible, Cat. You just need to look at Lizzy to know how incredible you are" he tells me.

I'm overwhelmed by Sid's warm hand in mine and even more by his words. He is looking at me with an intensity I don't think a man has ever looked at me with. I just don't know what to say to him.

"I'm sorry Cat, was that out of line?"

It hits me that this is the second or maybe third time that Sid has apologized or asked if he offended me. Is this a Canadian thing or maybe a Sid thing? It seems that Sid feels like he's done something wrong. That's not fair.

"Sid, you haven't offended me; not today and not at all. Ok?" I realize that I'm now holding his hand in both of mine.

"Ok" Sid replies.

I watch as Sid looks down at my lips and then watch his tongue dart out and wet his own. Oh wow! I can't even think now as I lift my eyes to search his. It's like they say in the movies; everything is moving in super slow motion. Sid moves toward me and I begin to move toward him. I can feel my lips part slightly and then my eyes close as Sid's lips softly touch mine. His hand is cupping my neck now too.

"Mommy!"

I pull back when I hear my daughter cry out for me. When I turn around, I see Lizzy standing there. She's in her pajamas, holding her penguin and rubbing her eyes. I go to Lizzy and pick her up in her arms. She cuddles in right away.

"My little Lizzy. What's wrong sweetheart?"

"Mommy, ogre was after me." Lizzy replies.

"Awe, baby, let's sit down" I say and look back at Sid.

He's smiling now. I feel relief. I guess I was wondering how he would react to our kiss being interrupted.

I smile back at him and say "Lizzy, you should see who's here."

She lifts her head and looks behind me.

"Sidwee" she squeals, climbs out of my arms and runs to Sid who's sitting on the sofa. He catches her in a hug as she jumps into his arms.

"Hey there little Lizzy" he says to her.

Lizzy pulls back and takes each of his cheeks in each of her hands.

"Sidwee" is all she says back to him.

"Did you have a bad dream?" Sid asks her and I watch my daughter suck in her bottom lip and nod. I walk to the sofa. I don't know how much experience Sid has with kids and I don't want him to feel weird.

"Oh Lizzy. What was it about?" Sid asks her.

"Munster" Lizzy says and buries her face in his neck.

Sid frowns and looks at me over Lizzy's shoulder. I mouth "monster" to him and he nods. Sid slowly rubs his hand up and down her back trying to sooth her.

"Lizzy, would you like me to go and chase away the monster?" Sid asks her.

Lizzy nods against his neck then Sid bundles her in his arms and stands up. He looks at me for a few moments until I realize he's waiting for me to show him the bedroom. Oh God, he's going to see that we share a room. I've never been embarrassed by how I live and I'm not embarrassed now; but, I guess I'm just unsure what Sid will think. I look at him sweetly holding my daughter after telling her that he will chase away her "munster."

I point toward the bedroom and turn for him to follow. When I get to the room, I turn on a small light. There is a glow in the room and I take an objective look. There are toys in one corner in an organized mess. Lizzy's bed is pink; sheets, blanket, pillow. It's all pink. I've tried very hard to make it a little girl's dream. I turn to Sid and he smiles at me.

"Ok Lizzy" Sid says. "Tell me where the monster is and I'll get rid of him."

Lizzy points to the closet. Sid walks to her bed and lays Lizzy down then pulls the covers over her. He walks carefully toward the closet as if he's trying to sneak up on the monster. When I look at Lizzy, she has the covers up to her chin and is staring fiercely at Sid's back. He opens the closet door slowly, just a crack, then he pulls it open fast and says "boo!"

He opens the door wide and stands back.

"Ok Lizzy, I've scared the monster away. The closet is empty now." Sid says to Lizzy and looks at her. Lizzy peers around Sid to the closet. She must like what she sees because a smile breaks out.

"Ok Lizzy, time for bed. Say thank you and goodnight to Sid" I remind her.

Lizzy pulls her arms out from under the covers and opens them for a hug. Sid chuckles and hugs her.

"Thank you Sidwee" she says in her sing-song way.

"You're welcome. Sleep well" Sid tells her.

I go to Lizzy and give her a hug and kiss. We leave her drifting off to sleep and head back to the living room to the sofa.

"Thank you so much Sid. She saw a cartoon with monsters and we've had some trouble sleeping since" I tell him.

Sid chuckles and replies "I understand. Monster are to be taken very seriously Cat."

Now I laugh. I place my hand on his arm as we're laughing. Just touching Sid's warm, hard bicep reminds me of the almost-kiss before Lizzy interrupted us. I can see the exact moment that Sid remembers it too and then we're not smiling at each other anymore. Sid raises his hand and cups my check gently. I lean into it and kiss his palm. It's like electricity goes through my entire body when my lips touch his warm skin. When I look back into his eyes I see they have gone very dark. His eyes drop to my lips and I lick them instinctively. He does the same in response. Our eyes lock again as he leans into me. I'm acutely aware that I'm sitting cross legged and facing Sid. He has turned toward me and is leaning in close enough for me to feel the heat of his body radiating towards mine.

When Sid's lips touch mine, I feel the sensation travel from my lips and throughout my body. At first, our lips simply press together. The kiss is warm and sweet; it feels natural.

We pull back at the same time. Sid's runs his thumb over my cheek softly before sliding it down further until he rubs it over my bottom lip. I don't know what comes over me but I open my lips and slide his thumb into my mouth. I watch Sid's eyes widen at first and then they darken further. I run my tongue over his thumb and watch his dark eyes narrow. Sid slides his thumb out from my mouth and then over my bottom lip again. He continues moving his hand until it cups the back of my neck then he pulls me to him. Our lips meet again only this time the kiss is more insistent. I run my hands up Sid's chest. His muscles are so hard and his skin so warm beneath his tee shirt. I feel his tongue slide over my bottom lip and then my top lip. I part my lips in response and feel his tongue slide over mine.

A moan fills the room and part of my brain registers that it's me. Then I can't think at all; it's all feeling. Sid's free hand slides over my waist and around to my lower back. I slide my hands up his chest, over his shoulders to clutch at the muscles there. As my hands hold on, Sid pulls me closer to him. I slide onto his lap and I'm suddenly very aware of how big he is and how small I am in his arms. I pull back and watch Sid open his eyes to look at me. His eyes are heavy lidded and dark with desire. His lips are pink and plump from my own.

"Is everything ok?" Sid asks me in a hushed voice and is very focused as he waits for my response.

His question makes me think. Is everything ok? I feel the heat coming from his body and the hard muscles under my hands when the answer becomes very clear: yes! As an answer, I dive into his lips again. I can tell that I take him by surprise but he catches up quickly. Time has no impact anymore. I'm completely wrapped up and lost in Sidney. Our lips continue to play and tease while our tongues give chase. Sid's fingers slide over my back and hips. They leave heat everywhere he touches. When his fingers slip beneath my shirt and over my bare skin it shocks me like a cold bucket of water. What am I doing?


	5. Chapter 5

While I didn't intend for this to happen, I can't find myself upset to have Cat in my arms and wrapped around me. She's so small that she fits entirely on my lap. I feel Cat's warm skin of her lower back with my fingers when I sense the change. Cat immediately stiffens and we break our kiss. Cat quickly slides off of my lap and onto the sofa beside me. I try desperately to control my heart rate, not to mention other parts of my body, and I'm not having much luck.

"I'm sorry Sid" Cat says.

I quickly reply "there's nothing to be sorry for Cat."

When I look at Cat, her face is bright red. Is she embarrassed?

"Ok but I am sorry Sid. It's not that I wanted to stop but Lizzy is in the next room. I don't usually have men over and wouldn't want Lizzy to …" she stops there.

Fuck. I forgot all about Lizzy sleeping in the bedroom. Of course Cat wants to stop. She's a mom and thinks about her daughter first. We also did just meet. We both let it get out of hand but I'm definitely having trouble getting back in control.

"I understand Cat, really. Um, I'm just going to use the washroom" I tell her and quickly head there.

I saw it taking Lizzy back to her bedroom and take refuge there now. Splashing some cold water on my face helps and I feel 'things' returning to normal. Now it's going to be awkward. What do I say? Should I leave?

After heading back into the living room, I notice that Cat is where I left her and she's sipping her juice. When she sees me, Cat smiles and I feel better; looks like it's ok. I sit beside her again.

"Everything ok?" she asks me.

I look over at Cat and see a humourous gleam in her eyes. She knows exactly why I went so quickly to the washroom. Looks like she's not all sweet and innocence after all; it makes me smile.

I notice that the Bruins/Rangers game is on the TV. I look at Cat and I guess she can tell I'm wondering why she turned it on.

"Ok Sid, I have to admit that I know nothing, less than nothing really, about hockey.

I look at Cat skeptically but she seems very earnest.

"Would you tell me about the game" she's asks me. "I have a feeling that I might be watching more hockey games in the future."

She's flirting with me again. Ok, so I didn't read the situation wrong. She's interested and we were just moving too fast. I guess we really have only seen each other two or three times. Who am I kidding? I know that this is the fourth time. I remember every time and every moment of our time together.

"So, will you?" she asks.

I know a smile breaks out over my face.

"If you're sure, yeah" I reply.

We both settle into the sofa again and I see the game is starting back for the second period from intermission. First I explain the positions. She asks which won I play and then if the 'C' on my sweater is for centre. When I tell her that I'm the captain, she doesn't heap praise on me like most do. Instead she asks questions about responsibilities, how captains are chosen and why I was chosen. I've never been asked why I was chosen before. Everyone usually knows why. I like how this is all new to Cat. I move on to talk about the lines on the ice and some of the most used rules and penalties. Explaining icing is harder. Next season they're thinking of testing hybrid icing which will be much better for the game.

We settle back to watch the game when Cat understands most of what's going on. I love how she emotes every time there is a hard hit. A particularly hard one, but clean, has one guy falling to the ice and he doesn't get up right away. They blow the play dead and the trainer comes out to see to the player. It's Brad Richards so the Rangers are definitely nervous.

"Is he ok" Cat asks me.

I don't reply right away because I'm preoccupied by the way she's linked her arm with mine and is pressed up against my side.

I bring my attention back to the game and see that Richards is still on the ice.

"It looks like he is. The trainer is keeping him on the ice right now to run through all of the things that could be wrong. When they've eliminated everything then they'll let him get up."

No sooner do I say this then Richards is getting up and skating off the ice.

"He's going to the bench so he's fine. It was a hard hit so he's shaken up but he'll be fine; most likely bruised a bit but fine" I tell her.

Not twenty seconds later, Asham, who used to play for the Pens, decides to take action for the hit and picks a fight with Marchand who laid out the hit on Richards. The fight is active and brutal. Both of them have done this before and know exactly how to damage their opponent.

"Why are they fighting? Are you allowed to fight? Have you been in a fight?" Cat runs all of her questions together.

"They're fighting because the Bruins hurt one of the Rangers' key guys." I tell her.

"Oh, so they're sticking up for their team mate."

"Yep" I respond.

"Have you ever been in a fight?" She asks me.

"A couple but it's not something I have a lot of experience with; only a few times in my entire career." I glance at Cat and her brow is furrowed. Oh oh, what does this mean?

"Did you win?" She asks.

I can't help but chuckle. She doesn't chastise me but instead wants to know if I won. "It's hard to tell in fights sometimes but no one has ever knocked me down first."

Cat smiles and then says "good."

We go back to watching the game. I slip Cat's hand into mine and she laces our fingers while laying her head on my shoulder. The game goes into intermission and they start talking about teams around the league. When they bring up the Pens, film of our last game and one of my goals is highlighted.

"Oh, there you are Sid!"

I can't help but chuckle when she cheers at my goal. She saw it live but it's like she's watching it for the first time. It's really sweet.

"They show you a lot when they talk about the Penguins" she says.

Hmm ... "How do you know that they show me a lot?" I ask her.

She looks slightly embarrassed with a red tinge to her cheeks. I watch her bite her bottom lip before she answers.

"Ok, fine. Since we met, I've been watching the news as often as I can to see the game highlights. Roots also has a show on about the team after your games." Cat admits.

It's really sweet. I lean down and kiss her cheek.

"Thank you" I reply.

"For what?" She asks.

"For being honest and really cute too."

She turns toward me and kisses my lips softly. As the next intermission begins, I notice that Cat begins to yawn. That's when I remember what Miss Sally said about how much Cat's been working.

"I should get going" I tell her and rise from the sofa.

As I rise, I keep Cat's hand in mine and we walk to the door like that, hand in hand. I have to let go to put my coat on but then I take both of her hands in mine. As I look into Cat's eyes, I know that something shifted tonight. It might have been when I was scaring away Lizzie's 'munster,' or when we shared that searing kiss. It could have even been when we were simply watching the game and holding hands. All I know for sure is that I want to know this girl, everything about her, including her daughter. Lizzie has a strong hold on my heart and her mom isn't far behind.

I lean down, a ways down given how short Cat is, and take her lips softly with mine. The kiss feels incredibly sweet and full of promises I didn't know I wanted.

When we part, I say "I'd like to see you again."

Cat smiles slowly until she's grinning at me.

"I'd like that too."

Now I know that my grin matches hers. She wants to see me again too.

"Give me your phone" she says and I unlock it then hand it to her. I watch as she types into the phone and then hands it back to me. It simply says 'Cat' and her phone number.

"Goodnight" I tell her and indulge in on last, soft kiss.

"Goodnight Sid" she responds.

I can't help the smile I feel pull at my lips again. This was an unexpected and wonderful evening. The whole drive home I replay every moment over in my head. She seemed to like the game when I explained it to her. Actually, Cat asked some really great questions and wanted to know as much as possible about the game. Siting there side by side on the sofa, her small hand in mine, was both comfortable and exciting. I can't seem to forget the feel of Cat in my arms with our lips locked either.

I'm at my apartment before I know it. For the thousandth time, I can't wait until my house is done. I finally found land that was perfect and then tore down the current structure and built my dream house. It was a surprise to me how much I've enjoyed being involved in selecting every aspect of my new home. I wonder what Cat would think of it? Holy shit, where did that come from? Definitely getting ahead of myself there.

I realize that I'm tired too as I pull into my spot underground. The apartment was a good idea while I wait for the house. It was past time to leave the Lemieux's too.

It isn't until I grab my bag from the trunk that I realize that I forgot all about my reason for originally seeking out Cat. The big, stuffed Iceberg smiles up at me. I forgot about bringing it in when we got to her apartment. Oh well, I guess I'll definitely have to call and see her again.

Up in my living room, I settle in front of the TV to watch the end of the Rangers/Bruins game. With a shortened season, every little game matters. At the commercial, I pull out my phone to text Cat.

'You awake?' I send.

A few seconds later I hear back.

'Yeah'

'What are you doing?' I ask.

'Watching the end of that game. You?'

'Me too'

Then nothing for a few moments.

'I feel like I should ask what you're wearing?' I text. Oh God! Did I really just say that to here? How do I take it back?

'You'd be disappointed. Tattered, comfy robe. What about you.'

I chuckle. She has a great sense of humour.

'Haven't changed' I tell her.

'Good, don't change, I like you the way you are.'

It takes me a few moments to realize what she's said. She turned 'changing clothes' to 'changing me.' Ok, she has a really great sense of humour.

'Ahahahaha' I reply.

Another few moments go by.

'I forgot to give you something' I tell her.

'Something?' she asks.

'Something for Lizzie actually. I have the large stuffed Iceberg for her. She was supposed to get it at the game.'

'Awe, thanks Sid. That's sweet. You'll spoil her.'

'No I won't' I respond

'A little spoil is ok' she tells me.

'Good because she's too cute not to spoil.'

We're both quiet again. The game ends and I receive a text.

'I'm going to bed. Goodnight Sid'

'Goodnight Cat'

I already feel the need to call her, talk to her again. I turn the lights off in the living room and head down the hall. When I get my schedule for the week, I'll definitely have to figure out when I can see Cat again.

All Lizzy could talk about over breakfast was Sid. He is her hero now for scaring away the monsters in the closet. That makes me feel uneasy and worried. I haven't even had a date since I learned that I was pregnant. Lizzy has had men in her life, at the Centre and the diner, but never in our home. I've never had to worry about this before; it was simple because I didn't date. What if Lizzy gets used to having Sid around, we date for a while, and then we break up? It's not just me who is affected. Lizzy's little heart would break. Is it worth going through all of that when it could hurt my daughter? What on earth is the likelihood had Sidney Crosby would actually want a life with a waitress and single mother? None, that's the likelihood. Of course he was incredibly sweet with Lizzy. He was also wonderful with me too. I'm in unfamiliar and scary ground now. How do you date as a mom? How do you date Sidney Crosby?

"Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!"

Lizzy brings me out of my thoughts.

"Yes sweetie" I reply.

"Whens Sidwee coming back?" She asks.

Shit, she's only seen him a few times and she's already asking after him. How can I squelch her question when I'm wondering the same thing? I took so many parenting classes at the Centre. How come they didn't teach me how to date too?

"I don't know Lizzy. We'll have to see."

I look at my daughter now and there's the bottom lip sticking out and quivering. I'm exhausted since I went to bed so late, after a double shift, and Lizzy woke me up so early. I really don't have the patience to handle a tantrum.

"We can watch him on TV tonight" I tell her. Sid said he was playing tonight; at least I hope it's tonight.

"TV?" She asks me.

"Yeah, we can see him play hockey on TV."

This makes her think. At least she isn't considering the meltdown anymore.

"Toons" she tells me.

"Yes, you can watch cartoons. You ate all of your breakfast, good girl."

Lizzy smiles at me, grabs her penguin and goes to the living room. I hear the TV turn on. I always leave it on her favourite channel since she knows how to turn the TV but not change the channels. We're having trouble with eating breakfast so I had to take away morning cartoons if she doesn't eat. Yep, the threes truly have been more horrible than the twos.

I find myself sighing into my coffee. I may have avoided a tantrum but I still don't know what to do about Sid. It's interesting that I don't doubt if I want to see Sid again. This is the first man I've wanted to spend time enough to figure out how to do it. I sigh again which turns into a yawn. I definitely need more sleep. It's my day off but that doesn't matter when you have a three year old. Maybe she'll want a nap or will fall asleep watching cartoons.

My phone vibrates and I grab it hoping it's Sid. It is and I actually giggle. Wow, it's been a long time since I found myself giggling, especially over a man.

'Good morning. Are you awake?' he texts.

'Of course I am, I have a three year old'

'Hahaha yeah, I would guess so'

'What are you up to' I ask him.

'Have a morning skate and then the game tonight'

'Lizzy's excited to watch you tonight'

'Come to the game' he tells me.

'Can't, too late for a three year old. We are only going to watch the first thirty minutes.'

'How about lunch?' he asks me.

What am I going to say? I still haven't figured out what to do and now Sid's inviting me, or us, for lunch. What am I going to say? Sid beats me to it.

'You're taking a while to respond. Problem?'

That one word, 'problem,' holds so much meaning. Yes there's a problem. I don't know what to say or do.

'Cat?'

I have to say something.

'Yeah, I'm here.'

'What's wrong?'

'Nothing is wrong. I just don't know what to do.'

'About what, me?'

'Yes' oh boy, did I really say/type that to him.

'If you don't want to go out with me Cat, I'll be ok. Just be honest.'

'I want to go out with you Sid. It's just hard to figure out'

'What's hard to figure out? If you like me?'

Ok, now he doubts that I like him.

'Sid, I like you and want to see you again but I have more to think about than just me'

'Lizzy?'

'Yeah'

'I understand. What do we do now?'

'I don't know'

'What have you done with other guys you've dated?'

How do I answer that one? He's been so sweet that I owe him honesty.

'I don't really date Sid'

Now it's his turn to be really quiet. Maybe I freaked him out with that admission.

'Sid?'

'Yeah'

'Now you're the quiet one'

'You don't date?'

'Not since I've had Lizzy. Between work and trying to be a good mom I haven't really had time'

He's quiet again so I text 'Sid?'

'Yeah, so why did you agree to go out with me'

Oh boy.

'I like you' I admit

'Oh, I like you to. So, lunch?'

My instincts have worked well so far. Maybe I should keep going with them.

'Ok, I'd like to have lunch with you' I text.

'Good, pick you up at noon?'

'Great, I'll see you then'

'Great'

Oh boy, I'm really getting in deep now. We're going to lunch. I guess lunch is innocuous. It's friendly; lunch. Maybe if I keep thinking that way then I'll believe it. Deep down I know that nothing between me and Sid will be innocuous. Wow, it's only been three or four times that I've seen him and I already know that this feels different.

I decide to keep going with my instincts. I'll go to lunch with Sid but won't take Lizzy. Of course Sid didn't say anything about bringing Lizzy but he's so good with her that I'm sure he would be ok with it if I did. I am just so scared that's she's going to get attached. If it doesn't go all the way then she'll have her little heart crushed. A small voice in my head says 'and so will you' but I ignore it.

After running across the hall and asking Miss Sally to watch Lizzy, I head into the shower. It doesn't take me long to get ready since I'm used to doing it very quickly. Lizzy doesn't have a long attention span and will get into trouble if left alone too long.

The rest of the morning goes by quickly. Lizzy and I play with her dolls and then build a castle for them out of her blocks. We knock it down and build it again. These are moments I cherish. We're having simple fun. I used to get very anxious that I couldn't take my daughter to expensive parks or buy her lots of toys. I quickly realized that she would love playing with an empty box if we were playing together. It still bothers me that I can't do everything for Lizzy but I can do the things that matter.

Around 11:30am, Lizzy starts yawning widely and rubbing her eyes. It's definitely time for a nap. Usually it's at 1pm but she got up extra early today and is tired earlier too. She drops off quickly which gives me time to get ready. A critical eye shows me just how tired I am too. It takes a little more cover-up than usually to hide the dark circles under my eyes. I regret that I don't have more time to do something with my hair so a pony tail will have to do. That's when I'm stopped short: what am I going to where?! My wardrobe consists of work clothes, yoga pants and tee shirts and jeans. I guess jeans will have to do. A search through the back of my closet and I find a light blue tunic style blouse. Wow, I didn't realize that I kept this. It was way too small after I had Lizzy but I couldn't give it away because I loved it so much. My new diet, basically working on my feet so much coupled with little time to eat, has let me get back into the blouse today. In my jeans and top, I take a critical look in the mirror. Hmm, I actually look good. A pair of ankle boots, that thankfully look better the older and more rugged they get, complete the look. I'm just finishing when I hear the door open and Miss Sally shuffle in. She knows to be quiet as she enters because Lizzy could be sleeping.

"You look so pretty Kitty Cat" she tells me when I walk into the room. "Thanks" I reply. "This is ok for lunch, right?"

"You look gorgeous. Sid is lucky to be going on a date with you. Don't you roll your eyes at me little girl." Miss Sally scolds me. "You are a beautiful woman and any man would be lucky to have you; including Sidney Crosby. You remember that Cat."

I don't know that I agree; but, I can't disagree with her when she's so fierce about it.

"Ok Miss Sally."

We say our goodbyes and I head down to meet Sid in front of my building. As I'm walking out the front door, Sid is walking up the steps.

"Hi" I say.

"Hi" Sid replies and then leans in to give me a light kiss. "You look beautiful" he tells me and smiles.

I feel that smile go through my entire body. Wow.


	6. Chapter 6

As I drive away from Cat's building, I say "thanks for coming to lunch."

"Thank you for inviting me" she replies. "Where are we going?"

Ok, this is the tricky part. I asked her out before really thinking it through and now I need to come clean.

"Well, ok, this is awkward. Cat, it's really hard for me to go out, in public I mean. In Pittsburgh, I'm recognized everywhere which means pictures and autographs. Fans are great, don't get me wrong, but there really is no privacy." I pause and glance over to see Cat frowning. Shit.

"I guess that's hard for you, isn't it?" She says.

I breathe a sigh of relief; she gets it. "I don't want you thinking I'm complaining; I realize how lucky I am and being recognized is part of it. It's just hard to, well ..." I don't know how to finish the sentence.

"Date?" She finishes for me.

"Yeah, if you consider this a date." Why am I suddenly so awkward? It's like I'm twelve years old again.

"Is that why you're acting so odd Sid? Yes, I consider this a date. And yes I understand about the public thing. So where are we going for lunch then?"

Wow, she really does gets it. "I was thinking my place. I have an apartment downtown."

"Are you just trying to get me alone Sidney?"

I hear the teasing tone in her voice. "Maybe I am Cat."

She chuckles and replies "I'm ok with that."

I'm laughing as I pull into the underground parking at my place. We go up the elevator and arrive at my floor where there are two doors.

"This one is mine" I tell her pointing to a door.

"Are there only the two apartments on this floor?" She asks me.

"Yeah, the couple in the other place are great neighbours. They're in Florida half the year and are really nice too."

We head into my apartment.

"Wow" Cat says and, after kicking off her shoes, walks directly to the wall of windows overlooking the city.

"Seriously Sid, wow. How do you ever do anything but look out at this view?"

I leave my jacket and shoes at the door before joining her at the windows.

"It's what sold me on the place." I say and help her off with her jacket. She turns and gives me the most beautiful smile. I lean down and give her a soft kiss. When I pull away, her smile is still beautiful but the wattage is definitely turned up.

"Hungry?" I ask her.

"Starving" she replies.

As we walk to the kitchen, I make another admission.

"I don't cook" I tell her.

"Doesn't that make it odd for you to invite me to lunch at your place?" She replies with a chuckle.

"Yeah, I guess so; but, I can buy and serve really well."

"Ok then, I'm looking forward to what you bought and will serve."

In the kitchen, I take dishes out of the oven where I left the food to warm.

"Can I help?" Cat asks me.

"There's not much to do. What would you like to drink? My fridge looks similar to yours for drinks but I do have a white wine chilling."

She pauses and replies "actually, I think I'll have some juice." She pulls out some orange juice then asks "what would you like?"

It's nice of her to ask and I agree. During the season, I usually don't drink too often so if she isn't having any then I won't either.

When Cat comes back in the kitchen after taking our juice out to the dining table, she asks "Can I help with the rest?"

"You're the guest" I tell her. "I didn't cook so the least I can do is serve. Go sit down."

"Yes sir" she replies and heads to the table.

It doesn't take me long to plate everything on serving dishes. I'm glad mom suggested that I buy them.

"Ok, I have grilled chicken, green beans and roasted potatoes. I hope you like it" I say as I sit down with her at the table.

"Wow Sid, it looks and smells delicious."

We dig in and I'm surprised by how much Cat puts on her plate and the enthusiasm with which she eats. I'm so used to women who eat sparingly. They always say either they aren't hungry or they get full very quickly. Then they sit there while I eat which is always weird.

"Not only does it smell good but it tastes even better. You can buy lunch anytime."

I can't help smiling at her comment given where my thoughts had just gone.

"I'm glad you're enjoying it" I tell her.

We chat during lunch about Lizzy and the diner. I talk about the team and our crazy schedule since it's only half a season. She's so easy to talk with and most often makes me laugh.

When we're finished eating, Cat insists on helping me clean up. She tells me that I can't put the serving dishes in the dishwasher so she's washing while I dry. When she hands one to me, the suds and water on her hands flies to my cheek and into my hair. I give her the withering look that I use most often in face offs. Cat immediately starts laughing. It over takes her and soon she's doubling over in uncontrollable laughter. I make a quick decision and grab the faucet to pull the hose out. I push the button and spray water at Cat. She reaches out to grab the hose and water sprays everywhere soaking us both. We both slip and fall to the floor. I manage to make sure that Cat falls on me so that she doesn't get hurt. The hose has snapped back into place so the water has stopped. We're both laughing now. When we finally stop, I help Cat up and our shirts are both soaked.

"Why don't I get you a shirt to change into?" I ask her.

Still giggling, she replies "that's a good idea."

I take her hand and lead Cat down the hall. As we walk, I realize that we're heading to my bedroom. Hopefully she doesn't think that I'm trying something. I leave Cat in the bedroom so that I can go to my closet and grab a tee shirt.

"Here's a dry shirt. You can use the washroom to change" I point to the en suite. Cat smiles and heads in to change.

Looking down I realize that my shirt is soaked too. Back in the closet, I hang my wet shirt up to dry before the laundry. I go into the bedroom to get a dry shirt as Cat is coming out of the bathroom. She's wearing my shirt that reads 'Property of the Penguins.' I feel an odd sensation at seeing the 'Property of' across her chest. It's probably completely sexist and wrong but it reads to me like she belongs to me. When I can move my eyes from the shirt, I see that her eyes aren't looking at my face either. She's currently staring down at my bare chest. I don't know what to do. She's obviously taking me in and I can feel the pull of attraction. I know what I want to do. When Cat's eyes find mine, I can see that she feels the same. Now I really don't know what to do. I decide to go on instinct.

Slowly I walk toward Cat and watch her lick her lips. Standing directly in front of her, I cup her neck and lower myself until our lips touch. Cat sighs at the contact and my control snaps. I take her lips in greedy bites and moan when I feel her small hands on my bare skin. My free arm snakes around Cat and pulls her up, flush against me. Her small body curves into mine and I can lift her easily off of her feet. Her fingers dig into my bare shoulders and I moan again. She feels so good against my hard body; soft and warm. Her legs wrap around me and I take the few steps left to my bed. I follow her down.

With Cat on her back, her neck is exposed and I pull my lips away from hers to taste her now exposed skin. I can smell a faint trace of perfume or maybe soap and something that is uniquely Cat. Her hands slide from my shoulders into my hair. I love the way her nails dig slightly into my scalp. I move lower to the base where her neck and clavicle meet. My hands slide lower too; down over her waist, hip and then leg. I pull her leg so that it wraps around me and I can feel the instant she can tell that I'm getting hard. Cat freezes beneath me so I immediately pull back to look at her. I see the half apology half regret in her eyes. I hate the apology I see, she has nothing to feel bad about, so I softly kiss her lips and then roll to lay beside her on the bed.

"Sid, I'm sorry."

"Cat, don't apologize, it's ok."

"It's just too fast, you know?"

I get that in my head but my body isn't quite up to speed yet. It is still craving hers, intensely, but my head over rides all other body parts.

"Yeah, I get it Cat. This really isn't why I asked you to come here for lunch you know."

I hear her chuckle and feel her turn into my side.

"I know that Sid. Things just got a little out of hand."

At least she doesn't think I'm a lying ass. That's good news although, again, some of my body parts don't quite agree. Lying like this isn't going to help much either so I sit up or pull Cat with me. Her small hand slips through the curve of my elbow and she lays her head on my shoulder. We sit like that for a few moments and I can feel my body finally returning to normal.

I'm unsure what to do next. I'm definitely not conceited but I've never had a woman put the brakes on like this; not since I was in juniors. How do you get out of this uncomfortable situation?

"Sid, what time is it?"

I look at my watch and reply "two thirty."

"I really should get home. Lizzy will have had lunch after her nap and I promised we'd go to the park."

That's when I remember that this girl, this woman, is a mom with responsibilities for a little girl. Of course she's careful and cautious.

"Ok, let me take you home."

I stand and pull Cat with me. She immediately wraps her arms around my waist and lays her head against my chest. I sigh and hold her close.

"Thank you for a wonderful first date Sid."

"You're very welcome Cat. I hope that means we can have a second date."

I can feel her smile against my chest.

"I hope so too" she replies and pulls back.

I look down and then lean in to kiss her softly. I can't resist.

"Ok" I say and pull back. "Since we're both dry again, let's get you home."

Cat smiles and nods so I turn to leave but I turn back to Cat when I feel her hand my arm. She's biting her bottom lip which I've learned she does when she's uncertain.

"Sid" she begins then pauses. "Thank you so much for lunch and, well, everything. It's been a really long time since I" she bites her lip again and I see her eyes quickly dart to the bed and then back to me. "Anyway, I've really had a great time."

I run my fingers lightly over her cheek then reach down to take her hand.

"Me too" I tell her with a smile and am rewarded with a smile in return.

Lizzy and I are having a tea party and I find my mind drifting back to my lunch with Sid a few days ago. I really felt like we started to connect. Sid has a great sense of humour which I love. We spend a lot of our time together laughing. The next day, Sid left for a two day road trip. I smile at that thought; I'm starting to get the hockey lingo now. He told me that he would stay in touch which I wasn't sure if I believed. True to his word, he sent me texts throughout each day. It was silly stuff about a prank one of the guys pulled or how there were girls trying to sneak up to their floor. I told him about my customers so something Lizzy did or said.

Lizzy didn't talk any more about Sid the next few days so I thought that she had forgotten about him. Suddenly, completely out of the blue, as I was making dinner, Lizzy held up her Iceberg and said "Sidwee, Sidwee!" then she went back to playing with Iceberg again. It's really funny how a child's mind works. Since she got the big Iceberg stuffed animal that Sid gave me, she calls it 'Sidwee.' It makes me wonder when it might be the right time for Sid and Lizzy to spend time together. It's not now of course, but how do I know when the right time is?

"Mommy!" Lizzy stands up and holds my cheeks in her hands so that I look directly at her. "Mommy!"

"Yes sweetie" I reply.

"Coooookie, coooookie!"

I think this is one of the reasons she likes to have a tea party; she can ask for a cookie.

"It's too close to dinner Lizzy. We can have a cookie for dessert after dinner, ok?"

I wait to see if this is going to cause a meltdown. I can see the decision washing over her face and decide that a diversion might work to combat a potential meltdown.

"Where's your penguin sweetie?"

That does it and she starts looking around the living room. She finds it and shouts "Sidwee" holding it up for me to see.

"Yes, sweetie, that's the penguin from Sidney."

She starts dancing with the penguin. It's funny because it's as big as she is. It was really sweet of Sid to get it for her even if it took a few times to give it to me.

Looking back at my daughter, I feel that overwhelming and all-consuming love that I didn't even know was possible until I had Lizzy. I remember watch TV or maybe it was a movie and someone said that you know you'll love your kids but you don't know, until you have them, that you'll be in love with them. Whenever I feel regret that my life is so hard or that I can't be a 'normal' twenty-something, all I need to do is look at my daughter and it all disappears.

My buzzing cell phone pulls me out of my thoughts. When I look at it, I can feel the smile wash over me. It's Sid.

'What are you doing?' He asks me.

'Having a tea party with Lizzy. You?'

'Just woke up from my nap.'

'I still can't believe that a nap is scheduled for full grown men' I tease him.

'It's a long day. We need a nap.'

'Whatever ;-)'

'Will you watch the game?'

I smile at his question. 'Yes. Miss Sally says that Philly is evil - her words - so she's coming over to watch it. You going to win?'

'Of course. Especially knowing that my biggest fan is watching.'

'You mean Miss Sally, don't you?'

Sid chuckles 'ok, yeah.'

'I may still be learning about hockey but I am a fan of yours too you know. Both on and off the ice.'

He doesn't respond right away. Oh oh, was that too serious. Did I go too far?

'I'm glad. Can I see you tomorrow? We get back late tonight after the game?'

'I'm working the day shift so I'll only see Lizzy for a couple of hours before she goes to bed. Would you like to come over when she's down?'

'Sure. Just let me know what time?'

'7:30?'

'Great, I'll see you then.'

'Good look tonight'

'Thanks babe'

Wow, that's the first time he's called me 'babe.' I feel like I'm twelve years old and the boy I have a crush on just said he likes me. Sidney Crosby likes me. A few weeks ago I didn't even know who he was and now ... Hmm, now we're what? I don't need to know the answer right now although we'll definitely have to figure it out before I bring Lizzy into the relationship.

This thought continues to play over in my head during dinner. It's Lizzy's favourite, homemade chicken nuggets, so she's in a chatty mood. Mostly she's talking about how much she loves her 'chik'n nugs.'

After dinner we go through our bedtime routine early so that Lizzy can watch part of the game before bed. Miss Sally, Lizzy and I watch the beginning of the game. They interview Sid on the ice before the game and Lizzy jumps up and down on the sofa.

"Sidwee, Sidwee, Sidwee!"

She's so cute; clapping her hands and saying his name over and over. It seems that my daughter is as excited about the Pens' captain as her mother is. I take advantage of a commercial to put Lizzy to bed. It takes two books to have her settled down enough to sleep. When she's out, I head back to the living room with Miss Sally.

"Our boy got another assist. That's two points in this game so far" she tells me.

I settle down beside her to watch the rest of the game. It is really exciting, fast paced and a little scary. Sid is getting hit a lot by the Philly team. I can feel myself tense every time he crashes into the boards or another player. When you are so high up in the boxes at Consol, you don't hear the hits because the crowd is so loud. On TV, they have the ice mic'd so you can hear every hit loud and clear. Sid looks like he has a target on his back with how often and how hard guys are hitting.

"He's ok Cat. This is what always happens to the best; they get targeted by the other team's thugs."

This makes sense but I don't feel any better. I know why but he's still getting hit constantly. He breaks out after side stepping a huge Philly player and that leads to a break out and Sid scores! Wow, a three point game. I'm really going to regret staying up for the whole game, especially at 5am tomorrow when I have to get up. The Penguins win the game 3-0 and Sid had a hand in all three goals. Wow, it's 10:30pm and 5am is going to come really early so I head to bed.

Much later, in bed, I hear a soft knocking that I think must be my imagination. When I'm more fully awake, I look at the clock and it's 3am. I still hear the knocking and can tell that it's coming from the front door. Lizzy is still asleep so I shut the bedroom door behind me so she stays asleep then I go to the front door. I see Sid when I look through the peep hole. He's wearing his suit so he must have come here directly from the airport.

I open the door and, before I can say more than his name, Sid takes me in his arms and pulls me up against his chest. His lips attack mine, hot and hungry.

I wrap my legs around his waist as Sid pushes me up against the wall. His body is hard and hot pressed against mine. One of Sid's hands is holding me up and his fingers are on my bare skin of my ass lifting the Penguins tee shirt I've been wearing to bed to my waist. His lips move over my jaw and then neck, licking and kissing all the bare skin he can find. I simply try to keep up. I pull his jacket off, loosen his tie, pull that off and then I rip open his shirt. I kneed and dig at all of the muscles that I find in his shoulders and back. Sid's lips have moved up to my ear lobe where he sinks his teeth. The moan that escapes me comes from a very deep place inside and causes me to move my hands between us and make quick work of his belt and pants.

For a moment, Sid stands me on the floor but still against the wall. He rids himself of remaining clothes and then strips the tee shirt off of me. Sid starts kissing me again; first my lips, over my jaw and then lower still. As Sid moves down my body, he kneels in front of me which puts his lips in perfect alignment. First, Sid takes one nipple in his mouth and I push myself further against his eager lips. His free hand pushes my legs to part for him. Sid slowly slides himself up my body so that I can feel his hot and hard body touch me everywhere. Before I can adjust to Sid's skin touching mine, he parts my legs further and thrusts two fingers inside me. Sid absorbs my cry with his lips. I've long stopped thinking. I can only feel and his fingers working me, as his lips do mine, until I'm in sensory overload. I may cum just from his small ministrations.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I think I hear something but I can't make it out. The noise becomes more insistent and louder until I can make it out.

"Mommy. Are you awake? Mommy?"

I open my eyes and Lizzy is sitting on the bed beside me. God, I dreamt the whole thing but it felt so real. I'm breathing heavy, my breasts are tingling, nipples hard and, between my legs, I'm soaked. Oh God, this was just a dream. If this is what I feel like after a dream, what will the real thing be like?


	7. Chapter 7

I came home to a very sick child. Lizzy threw up after lunch and was lethargic all afternoon. It's been going around the Centre and we did have a play date there two days ago. The good news is that it should run its course by tomorrow. The bad news is that it's going to be a very long night.

Miss Sally offered to stay with us, she hates seeing Lizzy not well, but I knew that she had to be exhausted after taking care of a sick three year old all afternoon so I told her to get some rest. I gave Lizzy a cool bath to help with her fever and then put in warm pjs. She wouldn't stay in bed so I brought her out to the living room with me and rocked her in my arms until she fell asleep. Kissing her brow, I can feel that her fever has come down and she looks much less pale than she did when I came home. My poor girl.

The buzzer sounds for the front door and I pray Lizzy doesn't wake up. Thankfully she doesn't so I place her in the corner of the sofa where she curls up and then go to see who is buzzing my apartment.

"Hello?"

"Hi Cat, it's Sid."

Shit. I forgot he was coming over tonight.

"Come on up" I say and buzz him in.

I glance at the still sleeping Lizzy, thank goodness, and then down at myself. I'm a wreck; didn't change when I got home so I'm wearing food stained work clothes, hair is in a messy bun and not the artfully arranged kind, and I'm positive I have no makeup left after giving Lizzy her bath where we both got wet. Oh well, this is motherhood and Sid will just have to realize that.

I open the door so that Sid doesn't need to knock just as he's approaching the door. He smiles widely when he sees me and then frowns as he really looks at me.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"I'm so sorry Sid. I forgot about us getting together. Lizzy has the flu so I've frazzled and crazy busy since I got home." I point to the sofa where Lizzie lays. "Can I take a rain check? I still need to get her to bed when I'm sure her fever is gone and then I have a few messes to clean up too. I'm so sorry you had to come all this way." I feel awful now. He's so busy and his free time is precious I'm sure.

Sid leans down, kisses my cheek and then walks by me into the apartment. He strips off his shoes and jacket then rolls up his shirt sleeves.

"I'll tackle the kitchen" he says when he sees that is one of the messes "while you take care of Lizzy."

Now I'm mortified. This is supposed to be our second date and Sid is going to wash my dishes.

"Sid, I appreciate it but this really isn't necessary. I don't want to put you out. Also, you really can't afford to get sick."

Sid frowns and replies "I never catch anything and what kind of guy would I be if I just left when you could use some help? I don't know what to do with a sick child but I can wash and dry dishes." Then Sid proceeds to do just that; he cleans dishes, counters and even the floor while I tackle the bathroom, bedroom to change Lizzy's sheets, and get her medicine ready. When I walk back into living room I'm stopped in my tracks. Sitting in the rocking chair is Sid with Lizzy in his arms. She's facing him with her head resting on his chest and her arms around his neck. Her eyes are shut and Sid is kissing her brow. The sweetness of the moment squeezes at my heart. I watch Sid kiss her brow a few times and graze his fingers over her cheek. Lizzy sighs as she feels Sid's lips and fingers over her skin. I feel my eyes get wet watching them together.

Sid glances up and our eyes meet. He gives me a hesitant smile and mouths 'she woke up.' They are so sweet together, the big, tough hockey player rocking the sick three year old, that I hate to pull her away from him. I walk over and sit on the stool in front of Sid. After brushing my hand through Lizzy's hair, I lay it on Sid's hard thigh and smile up at him.

"Her fever is gone" I whisper to him.

"Good" he whispers back.

"Do you want to give her to me? She'll probably stay asleep now."

"I can take her Cat."

I nod to him and get up. Sid follows me with Lizzy to my bedroom. He lays her in her bed, pulls the covers up over her little body and kisses her cheek. When he looks at me, Sid's cheeks turn pink like he's embarrassed. How can I not fall for a guy who kisses a little girl's cheek?

I gesture for Sid to follow me and we head back to the living room. We sit on the sofa and both sigh which makes us laugh.

"Sid, thank you so much for helping out. I could have done it alone but it was so much easier with you here. I really appreciate it."

He takes my hand and brings it to his lips to kiss it softly. The gesture is very sweet and I feel the warmth radiate from my hand throughout my body.

"You're welcome Cat. Heck of a second date, huh?"

I chuckle "yeah, I guess it was."

"However will we top it for date number three?"

I look at Sid now and feel a contentment wash over me. Right now, at this moment, I'm the most content that I've ever felt in my life; holding hands with Sid and sitting in the quiet night. I guess my plan to introduce Lizzy to the relationship slowly is now out the window. I'll need to figure out how to make sure Lizzy understands, as well as she can, what's going on with Sid. Maybe I should figure it out for myself first.

Sid pulls me out of my thoughts when he asks "You must be exhausted. Do you want me to go?"

I shake my head. Sid pulls me slowly into his arms and I settle there beside him with my head on his shoulder. I lose track of how long that we sit like this in the comfortable silence. I focus on the rhythmic beat of his heart and the feel of his fingers gently stroking my arm. Afraid that I might fall asleep, I pull back slightly to look at him. Sid smiles down at me. When I reach up to brush a curl away from his forehead, he turns his head slightly to kiss my palm. I pull his head down to me so that I can kiss those beautiful lips.

This kiss is sweet and soft. I feel like I'm floating on air and the only thing grounding me is Sidney. We continue our gentle exploration without the desperation that our kisses usually become. I can feel every place where Sid's large body is touching my small one. I'm enveloped by him, everywhere.

When we do pull away, our faces stay close as we gaze into each other's eyes. I have never felt this before. It's so strange, wonderful, but strange. Sid kisses the tip of my nose which breaks the spell by my giggling. I lay back against the sofa again, in Sid's arms.

"How long has Lizzy been sick?" He asks me.

"It just started today, after lunch. Unfortunately, it's going around the Centre so the kids are passing it to each other. I thought we had escaped it but no such luck."

"You're amazing" Sid tells me.

"So are you" I reply and smile up at him. I'm surprised to see that he's frowning rather than smiling back at me.

"No Cat, you really are incredible. You're what? 21 or 22 years old? And you're raising a beautiful, happy and, except for today, healthy child. You're amazing Cat."

I'm stunned by Sid's comments. I'm so focused on my day to day and making sure that I care for Lizzy that I don't think about my effort; what I do is for Lizzy and I'd do anything for her. Miss Sally tells me I do too much but that's really different than what Sid is saying. The admiration on his face seems odd to me. I'm just a mom like so many moms I see at the Centre. I'm not unique. Sid brings me out of my thoughts again when he cups my cheek and repeats "amazing."

I really don't know what I'm seeing now in his expression. Of course it's through a haze of tears that have filled my eyes. Suddenly I feel as exhausted, truly exhausted, as I really am. No one ever focuses on me or asks me how I really am. That's ok, I don't need it; but, the simple words of acknowledgment for what I do for my daughter undoes me and I feel the tears fall down my cheeks. Sid's thumbs wipe them away.

"Did I say something wrong?" Sid asks me.

"No, I'm sorry. I think I'm so tired right now and you are so sweet ..." I don't know what else to say or how to explain myself better. I've never had anyone tell me, ever, that I'm incredible or even tell me that I'm worth anything. Sure there were a few teachers in school, when I acutally went to class, who praised me but I was never in one place long enough for it to stick. Some of my foster families were ok but none of them were ever overtly supportive. I was lucky if they made sure that I had money for lunch.

"Where have you gone?" Sid asks me and brings me back again.

"God, I'm sorry Sid. I'm a mess tonight. Maybe we should try this again another time."

He stares at me for a moment then says "have you eaten?"

Confused I say "what?"

"Have you eaten?"

I try to remember the last meal I ate and I think it was lunch.

"Ok Cat, if you have to think that hard it was a long time ago. Stay here. I saw some soup in the fridge that I'll warm up for you. Don't even try to argue" he tells me as he gets up and heads into the kitchen. "Lay down Cat" he says as he disappears into the kitchen.

For a moment I consider ignoring him and making us both some soup but, when Sid looks back to make sure I've listened to him, I follow his directions. Maybe I will close my eyes for a moment.

I don't know what came over me. Cat looked so tired when she answered the door; tired, frazzled and ready to drop. When she suggested rescheduling, I almost agreed but when I heard that Lizzy was sick, I couldn't leave. I look down at the soup heating on the stove and wonder what the hell I'm doing. Two weeks ago I wasn't even aware that Cat existed and now, tonight, I'm cleaning her house, comforting her daughter and heating up soup. What am I doing? I give my head a shake and decide to just go with it. So far, that decision has gotten me this far. Even if I don't know where this is going, I do know that I feel needed tonight in a way that I never have before. I want to take care of them; both Cat and her pixie daughter. I don't know how Cat has done it. She's so young, has worked for everything she has, worked hard, and has a wonderful daughter and life.

While the soup is still heating, I go back to the living room and Cat is asleep; sound asleep. I don't have the heart to wake her so I go back to the kitchen and put the soup back in the fridge before heading back to the living room and the sofa. I manage to shift her head onto my lap and then turn the TV on. After finding a game, I settle back to watch. My time is divided between watching the game and watching Cat sleep. She always seems so capable, so willing to take on the world and anything it can throw at her. Right now, as she sleeps, she looks so small and young. Cat sighs as I stroke her hair. I see so much of Lizzy in Cat right now that she's sleeping. It's probably more that Lizzy looks like her of course.

A goal is scored and my attention is drawn back to the game. The dichotomy of the moment isn't lost on me. I'm watching a game I play on the TV with thousands of people screaming for their supposed heroes. That's when it hits me that Cat is one of the real heroes. It reminds me of my mom. She and my dad each worked two jobs and gave up so much so that I could play hockey and have my dream. There was nothing that they wouldn't do for me. I see that exact same love and support in Cat for Lizzy. I don't think you ever really fully can understand what your parents do for you.

"Mmmm" Cat sighs and stretches.

I wait for her to wake up but she only snuggles closer. My phone vibrates. The text is from Flower asking me how my date went.

'Still here mon ami' I reply.

'Oui?'

'Yeah, her daughter is sick so I stayed to help'

'She ok?'

'Yeah, flu'

'Playing daddy huh? Shit gotta go, Stella is crying'

'Ciao'

Flower loves everything about being a father. I've always known that I'd have a family but watching Flower with Stella has made me think of it a lot recently. Of course Tanger also has a kid now and I've always spent time with Duper's kids. Getting to know Lizzy has taken on a different meaning than simply meeting one of the kids who come to the game. I connected right away to the little pixie; she had my heart immediately. Glancing down at Cat sleeping and I know that Lizzy's mom isn't far behind.

Wow, I need to get a grip. This is only our second date and we're still getting to know each other. I need to make sure that I give Cat time. She's probably been through so much and works so hard to take care of Lizzy. She puts on a brave face and is always so positive but tonight I can see just how much it wears on her.

"Hmm" Cat stretches again and rolls onto her back and looks up at me. "Oh God Sid. I'm so sorry. I fell asleep huh?"

I brush her hair back from her face and reply "yeah, you did. That's ok Cat. You don't need to apologize. I completely understand."

She runs her hand through her hair and smiles up at me.

"I don't usually fall asleep on guests."

"Guests?"

"Well, dates."

I chuckle. "I'll try not to take it personally."

Cat smiles back at me. "Has Lizzy woken up?"

I shake my head. "She's been as quiet as you have. Not a peep for the last two hours."

"Two hours? Holy crap, I've been asleep for two hours? I'm really so sorry Sid."

"Cat, it's ok, really. I don't know how you do it. Between the hours you work and taking care of a three year old. I hope you don't mind me asking this but don't you have any family that can help you?"

Cat immediately stiffens and sits up. I can tell that she's pulled back and not only physically.

"Um, no, I don't have any family."

"I'm sorry Cat. I really didn't mean to pry."

"It's fine Sid. Please stop apologizing. Is that a Canadian thing?"

Confused, I ask "is what a Canadian thing?"

"Apologizing all the time? I appreciate it but it's not necessary Sid. I only knew my mother and she went to jail when I was nine. I went into foster care after that."

She shrugs and then goes into the kitchen. Wow, I really put my foot in it that time.

"You're probably going to yell at me but I am sorry to bring that up" I say as I follow her into the kitchen.

"I won't yell at you" she says with a smile. "You didn't know Sid and, besides, it's behind me now, I got through it and I'm only looking forward. Would you like a drink?" She asks and hands me a bottle of water.

"Thanks" I say as I take the bottle. How does she stay so positive with everything that she's been through? It's even more stuff than I knew. I don't know how she's done it without any support from family.

"I'm just going to check on Lizzy" she says.

I sit back on the sofa and sip at my water. We definitely need to change the subject even though I'm dying to hear more about her life.

"She might just be unconscious she sleeping so soundly."

I chuckle as Cat says this before dropping on the sofa beside me.

"She was really tired I guess" I reply.

We both sit in awkward silence now and it reminds me that we really haven't had any awkwardness between us; until now. Hearing about the foster thing brings up a million questions that I want to ask. The one that keeps coming to my mind: where is Lizzy's father? Why didn't he help her and take care of his child?

"Sid, I'm sorry if I was rude earlier."

"Now you're the one giving unnecessary apologies."

Cat chuckles and says "ok, fine. I'm not sorry."

"Cat, I want to know you better. That's why I asked about your past. I don't want to pry, really. You'll tell me more when you're ready."

Cat is silent again and I begin to worry.

"Sid, I don't like to look back, that's all it is. I can't change the past so I move forward. Let's just say that we don't have family, neither Lizzy nor I, except for Miss Sally of course."

I'm taken back by her fierce speech; especially by just how fierce she said it. Currently there is a big stop sign on her forehead saying 'don't go there again.'

"Ok, I get it" I tell her. This evening has been really different than I thought it would be. First, there was pitching in to help with Lizzy; not that I minded a And this is the first time that I've seen Cat be anything but positive.

"Maybe I should get going" I tell her and stand up. "You must be exhausted."

"To be honest, I really am" and she chuckles.

We get up and walk to the door. After I put on my coat and shoes, I turn to Cat. She looks tired but smiles at me. I go with instinct again and open my arms. Cat steps closer and wraps her arms around my waist. I hold her close and rest my chin on the top of her head then sigh. It may not have been the kind of date I intended but it's ending well and I learned a lot about Cat; including how much more I want to know.


	8. Chapter 8

'Is it too soon to say that I miss you' Sid texts me.

'Because you've only been gone for 2 days?' I ask.

'I guess, sure, but we've only been seeing each for a few weeks'

He's the cutest thing. 'So we're seeing each other?' I ask.

'What do you call it?'

Looks like my question to tease Sid has backfired on me. How do I answer his question?

'We have been on a date so I guess you could say that we are dating' I answer him.

'It's been 2 dates, not 1'

'I don't count the night with my sick daughter where I fell asleep and you cleaned my kitchen as a date'

'I do! It was one of the best'

'Now I know for sure that you're on new dating behaviour'

'New dating behaviour?' He asks me.

'Yes, when you project your best possible self to the other person'

'Is that what you've been doing?'

'Yeah right Sid, a messy house, no make-up and sick child is my best'

'Hahaha you can do better huh?'

'Yeah, I can'

'Then you'll have to prove it. When I'm back, we'll go out to dinner'

Oh wow, out to dinner with Sidney Crosby. Didn't he tell me that our picture would get taken and there would be a lot of attention? I don't know if I'm ready for that; now or ever.

'You're quiet' he texts.

'Sorry, didn't you say we wouldn't go out in public'

'We can go to a restaurant with a private room'

'Oh, that's good' Shit. 'Sorry Sid, I mean that we can have privacy' I really hope he understands what I mean.

'I get it Cat, don't worry. I'm the one who mentioned it first'

'Good'

We're both silent for a moment.

'So?' He texts.

'So what?'

'So, will you go out with me for dinner?'

Yeah he's seriously cute.

'Yes Sid, I will go out for dinner with you'

'Good. I gotta go. Ttyl?'

'Sure. Have a good practice'

'Thanks'

I put the phone on the table and picture Sid getting ready for practice. Of course I quickly picture him naked and changing into his gear. That gorgeous, hard, smooth chest is never far from my mind. My body has been craving his ever since I saw it and even more since I touched it.

I give my head a shake and focus back on reality. My break is almost over so I gather my things and think about my next date with Sid. Shit! What am I going to wear?!

* * *

"What are you so happy about?" Duper asks me.

"What do you mean?"

"Sid, you've been whistling all day and that smile has been permanently on your face."

Oh, I guess he's right. "I'm just a happy guy Duper."

"Not that happy" Nealer yells across the locker room. "You getting laid?"

I don't answer but I can feel the heat come to my face. Fuck.

"Holy shit! Are you getting laid Sid?" from Duper this time.

I ignore them and beginning changing into my gear. They know that I won't answer their questions but I'm sure that's not the end of them.

Practice was fun. We've been winning so everyone is loose and enjoying themselves. Duper keeps yanking my chain throughout practice. Then others started asking and Neal heard the questions so both he and Duper filled everyone else in. The remaining time at practice, and into the gym, they keep up on me. I learned a long time ago to just take it. If you fight back then they give it even worse. I was always the youngest on every team, often by a few years, so I learned to laugh it off. It was a defense mechanism back then and now I just go with it as part of the team.

"Are you just going to lay there all day Sid?" Nealer calls to me.

I'm currently stretching out although I think my mind has been wandering for a while.

"Funny Nealer" I tell him and move away from the mats. The Bruins' visitor workout room is smaller than most. We don't have a lot of room for everyone to be in here at the same time. With the guys yelling after me, I leave for the showers. I have a phone interview before we head back to the hotel. Maybe I'll have time to call Cat afterward.

I shower and dress quickly hoping that the interview can start early too. Thankfully it does and we end it quickly too. The guys are still showering so find a quiet spot. Cat should be on the bus home now.

"Twice in one day?" She says answering my call.

"Yep, you said that you had the early shift today so I thought that you'd be on your way home now."

"Have I become predictable?"

I can't help laughing. "Definitely not Cat. Predictable would not be remotely close to a word I'd use to describe you."

"So I guess I'm supposed to ask what words you would use."

Hmmm "beautiful definitely. Sweet, funny, valiant, inspirational."

"Valiant and inspirational? I'm neither of those things Sid."

Is she kidding? Does she really not see just how incredible she is?

"I guess you'll have to take my word for it Cat. You are all of those things babe."

She's quiet for a little while and I wonder if we've been disconnected.

"Cat?"

"Yeah, I'm here."

"Is something wrong?"

"Not really. I guess you see me differently."

"Maybe I see you as you are." How did we get here? Suddenly the conversation went from light to serious.

"We'll have to agree to disagree" she responds.

I decide to let her off the hook. I have a while to convince her; hopefully a long while.

"Ok, so we're still on for our date out?" I ask her.

"Of course. When is your schedule free?"

I go over the next few games and when I'm available. There are a few charity things and the game schedule is packed being a short season. All the nights that I'm available, Cat is working.

"Ok, this is really short notice but how about tomorrow night? I get home late after the game, then I'll have practice tomorrow and free after that."

"I'm off tomorrow. That's perfect."

"Did we just manage to align our schedules to have a night out?"

"I think we did. I'll need to see if Miss Sally can watch Lizzy but it should be ok."

Shit, I forgot about Lizzy.

"Maybe we should make it an early dinner and take Lizzy?" I suggest even though I really want us to be alone. I've never dated a mom before. How do I handle this right?

"Not on your life Sid. I'd love to have and adult night out. We can do something fun with Lizzy another time."

I can't help but smile at the phrase 'adult night out.' It has my mind going in a very dangerous direction given that she's thousands of miles away and I'm supposed to be going back to the hotel to nap before the game.

"I'll text you in the morning so we can firm up time and stuff."

"That's great Sid. So, how fancy is this place?"

"I don't know how to answer that; I'll make reservations at my favourite Italian place."

"Ok, what will you wear? Jeans, suit?"

Oh, that's why she's asking.

"Suit but no tie. Does that help?"

"Perfect."

I see some of the guys walking to the bus and hate that I have to hang up.

"I have to go Cat. Will you be watching tonight?"

I can hear the smile in her voice when she replies "is there something on TV tonight?"

"Funny, very funny."

"Of course I'll be watching. Lizzy and I will watch to the first commercial and then she'll go off to bed; but, I'll watch the whole game."

I feel a current go through my body knowing that she will be watching.

"Good. Damn, I really have to go."

"Ok, good game. I'll see you tomorrow."

We say our goodbyes and then I stare at the phone for a few moments.

"You've got it bad kid" Duper calls out as he walks past me. I don't need a mirror to know that I have a huge grin on my face. Talking to Cat puts a smile on my face every time. Shit, just thinking about her makes me smile. How am I ever going to fall asleep for my nap?

* * *

I think I'm going to hyperventilate. My hair and makeup are done, my dress is laid out and managed to get the stockings on without running them. Actually, since Tessa told about these 'stay up' kind, I'm a huge fan and they don't snag. She was so excited about my date with Sid that she wanted to hear about everything. She nixed what I was going to wear and insisted that I borrow a dress from her daughter. She's as short as I am so it's perfect but I'm not used to anything this nice. It plunges kind of low, Miss Sally told me to be quiet and live a little, and is very short. I dug out some very high heels I wore a lot in a previous life. Now that I'm ready to put on the dress and shoes, I'm very unsure of everything. So far, I've seen Sid in surroundings that I'm used to; even his apartment was a comfortable space. Going to this restaurant is more like going into his world and I'm feeling slightly unsure.

"Get dressed girl. He'll be here soon" Miss Sally calls from the living room.

I hear the buzzer and know that she's wrong because he's already here. As zip myself up I hear Lizzy yell "Sidwee" which makes me smile. She loves him so much. Ok, shoes on, dress on and one last look shows that I'm ready. Well, at least I look ready.

After a deep breath I head out to the living room and see Lizzy showing Sid her newest drawing. He is smiling and tweaks her nose. She giggles which makes me laugh causing everyone to look at me.

"Mommy" Lizzy calls and runs to me but I can't focus on her because my eyes are full of Sid. He's in a blue wool pea coat and I can see that he is wearing black dress pants and dress shoes. He smiles widely and I feel my lips curve in response.

"Hi" he says.

"Hi" I reply.

"Mommy?!" Lizzy tugs at my dress now to get my attention.

"Yes sweetheart."

"I showed Sidwee my piture. He said it was buteful."

"That's because it is" Sid says as he walks toward me. He kisses my cheek and whispers "you're beautiful too."

"Thank you" I whisper back.

"Sidwee!" Lizzy tugs at Sid's sleeve.

"Yes cutie."

"Me too, me too."

Sid looks puzzled so I tell him "she means a kiss."

His look changes to surprise but then he crouches down and kisses her cheek. Lizzy throws her arms around his neck and he hugs her close.

I kiss Lizzy myself and then we're off. When I hugged Miss Sally whispered "have fun. You deserve it."

Sid took my hand and held it all the way to his truck. It was sweet. It should have calmed me but I got more nervous. In the car, I feel like there is cotton in my mouth.

"What's going on Cat? You are very quiet."

What am I going to say or do now?

"I'm just, I don't know, I guess I'm nervous" I admit to him.

"If I'm honest, then I'm nervous too."

Wow, I'm surprised. I guess I always think of Sid as supremely confident. To hear that he's nervous tonight is reassuring in one way; but, it does make me wonder why he's nervous. Is it because we're in public together?

"Why are you nervous Sid?"

He glances over at me now since we're stopped at a light.

"Probably because this is our third date; this means that we like each other and it's getting more important, more serious."

I breathe a sigh of relief. I don't know why I doubted him before but it's great to know why he's nervous.

"Yeah" I reply. "Me too. Although I'm glad that we're still getting to know each other."

"Yeah, me too" Sid says back.

We smile at each other before Sid drives through the now green light but keeps hold of my hand.

When we're in Southside, Sid takes us down a back aisle and stops by a door.

"We're here" he tells me and gets out of the car.

As I'm getting out, Sid comes to my side and helps me. I smile up at him and we share a quick moment.

"Mr. Crosby?" I hear a man say.

"Right here Arturo" Sid replies and we turn to follow the voice.

We are led through a small hallway, past a kitchen and down another hallway. When we come out, there is a small room set up with soft lighting and a beautiful table for two. Wine is open and waiting.

"Oh Sid, it's perfect."

When I turn to him, he's smiling and replies "I'm glad you like it."

Arturo takes our coats and we sit. He's quickly back and pours our wine. After the whole smelling and tasting routine, we are alone again.

"Sid, this is truly wonderful. Thank you so much for arranging everything."

"You're welcome but I intend to enjoy myself as much as you do."

We chuckle and then settle in to look at the menu. I choose a pasta special and Sid has a steak.

"Why is this your favourite Italian restaurant?" I ask him.

"The food is great, they have private rooms for large and small groups and they know how to cook a steak." He replies.

We talk about food and our likes and dislikes. Sid shares that he's from the Maritime in Canada so he's always been a fan of fresh fish and lobster. He secretly prefers steak but doesn't tell many people. Apparently his image is so keenly formed that he changes his favourite food in order to support his home town. A part of my brain registers that this must be a very difficult way to live if you can't even share your true favourite food. Before I can voice my thoughts, our first course is brought to us. It's something that Sid ordered and we dig right in.

"Ok, this is seriously good. What am I eating?" I ask.

"It's their own antipasti. Grilled marinated peppers, zucchini, eggplant, mushrooms and other stuff I can't pronounce" Sid chuckles. I love how he's not concerned with not knowing everything. He doesn't think that he has to be a know-it-all to impress me. He's right.

"Well it's all really good."

We talk about the game last night, that they won, and a few of the great goals. One of those great goals was Sid's. He very self-effacing and downplays his own accomplishments while complimenting his team mates. This guy is too good to be true.

"Are you really this perfect?" The question flies out of my mouth before I can self-censor. Shit.

"What do you mean?" Sid asks.

"I didn't mean to say it actually; but, since I did, I guess I should explain. You are so different from all of the guys I've known before and I don't mean because you're a millionaire hockey player. It's who you are. Right now, I'm talking about your incredible goal and you bring up how great your team mates did. It's a really nice thing, that's all."

Oh God, I hope that came out right. Dating is so awkward. Looking at Sid, I can tell that he's embarrassed.

"I didn't mean to embarrass you Sid."

Now he chuckles. "I'm just uncomfortable with, you know."

He's so cute. He's really, really cute.

The main course arrives and it smells delicious. Then it tastes even better than it smells. We laugh and joke throughout the meal. I'm amazed at how much Sid can eat. It's incredible. He manages to eat his meal, which was large, and then half of mine because I would have exploded if I finished it. We decline desert, and coffee since Sid doesn't drink it, then the bill comes. I don't know what to do. I'm not able to pay or partially pay what this dinner cost; however, I am also not comfortable letting Sid pay for everything even if he can afford it. What do I do?

"I can almost hear the thoughts in your head Cat. I'm paying for dinner, ok?"

I simply nod, touched that he would know that I was struggling with this.

We are escorted out the back again where Sid's car is waiting for us, running. When we're inside, Sid turns to me and asks "where to next? Do you need to get home?"

What is he asking me? What are the options? Is he asking me if I want to, well, crap.

"I have an idea. If you don't have to be home right away, why don't we go to my place?" Sid says when I'm quiet for a few moments. "The view is incredible at night too. Even better than the day."

With some guys, I'd believe Sid wanted me back to his place for only one reason. Knowing Sid, and the fact that we've been at his place alone together before, I know that he's being honest and doesn't expect more than what I'm ready to do. My real problem is that I don't know what I want.

"Sounds great" I tell him.

On the drive, Sid asks me about Lizzy and I tell him about how she's introducing her 'Sidwee pengun' to everyone she sees because she has to bring it with her everywhere. We're still laughing when we enter his apartment.

"Wow Sid. You weren't kidding" I say as I walk directly to the big bay windows. It's an incredible view. I feel Sid behind me and then he helps me off with my jacket. He leaves for a moment and then comes back. His hands encircle my waist and pull me back so that I'm leaning against him. In my heels, I'm taller and my head leans back under his chin. I can't help the sigh that escapes me. Standing here in the dark, looking out at the bright lights of the city with Sid's arms around me, I feel ... I don't know what I feel except really good. I find myself craving more; much more.

I turn slowly and Sid's hands stay on my waist. I slide my hands up from his forearms up over his huge biceps and then muscled shoulders. He's taken off his jacket so I feel his warm skin through the thin cotton layer of his dress shirt. Looking up at his face I'm mesmerized by his lips. I remember the feel of them on my own. How he took tiny bites at my jaw and then the sensitive skin below my ear. His tongue darts out to moisten them and I can't hold back any more.

I slide my hands up to his cheeks and bring his face down to my own. At first, Sid lets me lead. I softly sip at his lips changing the angle slightly so that I taste ever bit of their pillow softness. When I part them with my tongue, I feel Sid's fingers slightly dig into my waist and I can't go slow anymore. I feel this deep need inside me that I've never felt before. I rise on my toes so that I can more fully fit my body flush with his. It helps but, before long, it simply isn't enough. I need more.


	9. Chapter 9

I should have known that one kiss wouldn't be enough. The moment I took his lips with mine, I craved even more. I change the angle so that I can taste even more. Sid's tongue slides over mine and then explores every recess of my mouth. His hands have come around my back now and then one slides down over my ass to pull me up closer to him. My core is right up against his. I moan at the contact even through all of the layers of clothing between us. Sid's second hand follows the first and he lifts me so that I'm straddling his waist. Our lips maintain contact the entire time. He walks us over to the sofa where he sits and now I'm straddling his lap.

I pull back for a moment to look into Sid's eyes which are so dark they look deep brown. His lips are a deep red, wet and swollen from mine. The angles and planes of his cheeks and jaw are completely opposite to his soft lips; those lips part, lean into me and begin kissing and licking my neck. I feel the effect of those lips deep inside my core and I can actually feel myself get moist. Involuntarily, my hips rotate and I grind into Sid's lap. His lips dig into the soft skin of my neck at the contact and I release a long moan. It feels so good to have Sid's hands, lips and teeth against me. I can feel him getting hard too which throws on the cold water. What am I doing? I'm a mom and have to think beyond my body's needs. Are we going too far? What will be the effect on Lizzy?

"What's going on in that head of yours Cat?" Sid asks making me draw my eyes to his.

His eyes are still dark with desire but there is a question in them now. I don't know how to answer any of my own questions about what this means. The last time I was reckless, there was a dramatic result who is currently sleeping at home. The problem is that my body just won't let me say no.

"Do you have protection?" I ask Sid.

He nods so I slide off his lap to stand in front of him between his legs. First I slip out of my shoes which make me a full four inches shorter. Then I slide one strap off of my shoulder, the next one follows until the dress is pooled at my feet. Sid's dark eyes widen and I feel a silent current of energy and heat go through my body. I'm standing there in front of Sid in only my bra, panties and stockings; I'm so glad that I went with the stay up kind.

Sid's hands circle my waist and he tugs me closer to him until his lips are lined up with my breasts. He leaves light kisses over the swells, first one and then another. His lip slide lower and take one nipple in his mouth through the lace. First his lips work and then his teeth scrape and tug. The friction of the lace and his teeth are driving me crazy. My hands on his shoulders dig into his skin through his shirt. His lips move over my other breast and repeats his actions. I think that I might start dripping soon I'm so wet.

My fingers are aching to touch his warm skin. When Sid leaves my breasts, I reach down and pull his shirt over his head. There is so much skin to explore and I begin tracing my fingers over his shoulders, biceps and then back. His chest is begging for me to taste so I kneel down in front of him and begin to attack first his shoulders and then down over his chest. His skin tastes so sweet and, when I scrape my teeth over it, I feel the shiver go through him and with goose bumps too. I love that I have this effect on him. When I pull back and look up into his eyes again, Sid pulls me up until I'm standing again. His hands circle one of my thighs and he rolls the stocking down to show bare skin. He repeats the actions on the other leg and now I feel the shiver go through me.

I hold each of Sid's cheeks in my hands and run my thumb over his bottom lip. Sid sucks it into his mouth and his tongue runs over the tip. When he finally releases it, I am transfixed by his lips again.

"Are you sure?" Sid asks me.

I don't need to think it over. I've already made the decision.

"Yes" I tell him. "I don't think I've ever been surer of something in my life."

Sid chuckles and stands up. He swoops me up in his arms and walks us to his bedroom. He slowly lowers me to the bed and slides down beside me. I slide my hands down his chest until they meet his belt. They make quick work of his belt, button and zipper before pushing them down. Sid kicks them free and then leans down to kiss me. His hard and hot body presses mine into the bed. I shift slightly so that he is completely over me and between my legs. His core presses against mine and I thrust up to meet him. A cry actually escapes my lips and into Sid's mouth. While his lips slide down to work at my neck, his hand slides my panties off of me. Sid's middle finger slides between my folds easily since I'm so wet. He works around my entrance and swirls the wetness all around. My body is so responsive to Sid's touches and I hear myself moaning with every new caress.

His lips slide lower down my neck, over my clavicle and down my chest. His teeth push my bra aside until they won't go any further. Now Sid needs to use both hands to take it off which means his talented finger leaves my core. I cry out softly at the loss and hear Sid chuckle. He makes quick work of my bra and tosses it aside before returning his hand between my legs and his mouth on my breasts. Simultaneously, Sid works at my nipple and my clit. I rise up off the bed to meet him. The sensations overtake me and I feel the pressure begin to build. Sid's fingers have spread the wetness all over and his finger slips over my clit easily; around and around then presses down. He repeats this sequence over and over that I barely notice that his lips have slipped down my body. When I am conscious of it, Sid is pushing my legs wide apart after kneeling on the floor between my legs. He's pulled me to the edge of the bed now.

Slowly, Sid's fingers pull back my folds and I can feel his hot breath on me. I almost come undone when he takes a long lick. I writhe under his mouth and cry out when his lips circle over my clit and he sucks. His tongue flicks over and then his lips kiss. He repeats the gesture over and over again and I feel the pressure building. It gets so intense and so quickly that I can't keep up. Suddenly, the orgasm pops and washes over me and I lose all control. My body spasms and shakes but I'm barely aware of it. The electricity slowly leaves my body and I'm coming back down to earth. When I can finally open my eyes, I see Sid lying at my side and we're in the middle of the bed. I have no recollection of him moving or moving me. I can feel the muscles in my vagina still quivering and I'm soaked. Sid leans down and kisses me softly.

"You are incredible" he whispers to me.

"No" I tell him. "You are incredible. My turn."

I push Sid back so that I'm straddling him. I pepper soft kisses over his cheeks, chin and neck before continuing down to his chest. Sliding further down, I lick and nip and feel him respond. Sid's fingers tighten in my hair as I lick over his stomach. Wow, I can feel each and every muscle in his stomach counting a six, no eight pack. Seriously wow. I continue lower, pull his boxer/briefs off and throw them to the floor. I glance up at Sid as he licks his lips and take him in hand. I slide my hand up and down very lightly so that there only the hint of friction. My eyes never leave Sid's as I stroke him slowly and he grows in my hand harder and bigger.

It's too much to bear so I lean in and take the tip in my mouth. Sid throws his head back and groans loudly which makes me even more eager. I lower my mouth until he fills it completely. Over and over I alternate between bobbing my head and running my tongue up and down the shaft. Sid's fingers tighten into my head and I feel his body tighten before his release then washes over him. Sliding up his body is a great feeling and I don't stop until I'm lying by his side. Sid pulls me closer to him and I feel his breath slow under my hand on his chest. I lose track of how long we lie together until I shiver since my skin has cooled.

"Come on" Sid says as he pulls us to the head of the bed and under the covers. I'm warmed by both the comforter and Sid's warm body. We're on our sides facing each other with our legs tangled and hands softly caressing each other.

"I'm not done with you" Sid whispers and kisses my nose.

I can't help my smile "you're not huh?"

"Nope; definitely not. Give me a couple of moments and I'll show you."

"A big, strong athlete like you needs a few minutes?"

"I said moments and not minutes."

Sid cuts off my laugh with his lips. The kiss that follows is soft, sweet and deep. I feel it all the way down to my toes. His hand slides down my body, over my hip and pulls my leg over his. Sid's body is a wall of heat and I feel it seeping into every part of my body. I feel Sid getting harder against my body and pull back from him.

"Is there anything smaller than moments?" I ask him and he simply laughs before diving back into my lips.

* * *

I thought I was going to explode when Cat took my dick deep into her mouth. It surprised me that she so willingly, and expertly, gave me a blow job but I'm not going to complain. Now, as I have her in my arms again, I can't get enough of her lips or her body. It may be sexist but I love how small she is in my arms. It makes me feel powerful and like I'm taking care of her. I'd never admit it but I like it.

I push Cat onto her back and settle between her legs while we continue kissing. I pull back slightly and nip her bottom lip. I see Cat's eyes narrow and have a brief moment to wonder at the mischievous look in them before she attacks. Cat's fingers dig into my sides. I don't know how she knows how ticklish I am but she's hit pay dirt on the first try. I'm feeling the laugh go through me and come out as a giggle. I try to wiggle away but she manages to reverse our positions until she's straddling me and still tickling. There's another good thing about my being bigger than she is; I'm stronger. I reverse our positions and pin Cat down to the bed.

"Who knew Sidney Crosby is so ticklish or can giggle so loud" Cat says on a laugh.

"Funny Cat, very funny. You're going to regret that you know?"

I lean down and take her lips with mine while chuckling again. The good humour is quickly overtaken by my need to be buried inside of her. Bringing her to orgasm was incredible and the bj mind blowing but my body craves hers. I desperately need to buried deep inside of her heat. I release her hands and push one between our bodies. She's still wet but not dripping. I slide a finger inside, then two, and work them in and out. Her eyes narrow again and she bites her bottom lip.

"No" I tell her. "I want to hear you moan. I want to hear you scream."

Cat's eyes widen and I quickly hope that I didn't go too far. I slip my fingers up to her clit, push down and am rewarded with a loud and long moan.

"That's it babe." I tell her.

I slip my fingers inside again and she's definitely dripping now. My dick twitches in impatience to be buried balls deep inside of her. I line myself up between her legs but Cat pushes against my chest. Fuck, I really don't want to stop; but, of course I do.

"What's wrong Cat?" I ask her.

When I look into her eyes, I see the mischievousness again. She pushes me back, more like a shove, until I'm on my back and Cat straddles me. Ah, she wants a different position. I reach over to the side table and grab a roll of condoms. Cat grabs one, takes it out of the package and then sheaths me.

Slowly, she lowers herself, inch by inch, until I'm completely filling her. She stops and leans down to kiss me. Then she raises and lowers herself slowly again. I'm desperate for her to go faster. I try to grab her hips but she pushes my hands away. She increases the pace slightly and I'm praying that I last. She is so wet and hot that I could have gone off the minute she had me in her fully. Again, she increases the pace and I can only stare into her eyes and watch her ride me. Faster and faster with me thrusting to meet her now, I know I'm getting close and, again, hope I last. She leans back with her hands on my thighs and takes me even deeper. I reach up and play with her clit and that does it. As I feel her tighten around my dick I know she's going over again and let myself go. Then it's just a haze of feeling. My dick goes off like a rocket while she milks it. I think my eyes are closed but there's only light. At some point, she collapses on top of me and we just lay there, each trying to catch our breath.

She raises her arms and rests her head in her hands on my chest. My chest aches looking at her. She's so beautiful. I brush hair back from her eyes and know that I have a huge grin on my face. I can't help it. It's hard to believe that this girl, so sweet and inspirational, is currently lying naked on top of me. "You are so beautiful" I tell her. She rolls her eyes and then rolls off of me. "You don't have to say that Sid." She grabs the sheet to cover herself. I yank the sheet off of her and she 'eeks' like she's seen a mouse. "It's too late Cat. I've seen all of you. I've touched all of you. I know just how beautiful you are." Her eyes widen and she leans forward to kiss me. I feel her lips curve into a smile and she nips my bottom lip. I can't help but chuckle and pin her down on the bed. I love these moments of playfulness from her. It's so sweet and silly at the same time. I hold her down with my body and her arms above her head with one of my hands. "I guess you've got me Sid. What are you going to do with me?"

Now I know she doesn't know anything about athletes. Saying that is like waving a red flag in front of a bull. I never back down from a challenge. I slip my free hand between her thighs and feel the wetness there. She still so sensitive, I feel her skin quiver as I slip a finger in and out. I slide beside her to have better access to her body. Running my hand from her knee, up her thigh, over her hip and then to her breast. I take my time there, watching her face the entire time. She's not smiling anymore. Instead, she is biting her lip. I lick my finger to wet it and then circle her nipple. Goose bumps break out over her whole body. I repeat this with the other breast to the same reaction. I replace my finger with my mouth and my tongue circles round and round. Then I nip, maybe a little harder than before, and she squeaks again. I look up at her and chuckle. She's squirming but it's only a token squirm. If I let her go, I know she wouldn't move an inch. My mouth continues to play with her breasts and my free hand travel lower, over her smooth stomach and to the core of her again. One finger, two fingers, playing inside of her and getting drenched. I take them out and move them to her clit. It's slippery since they are so wet and I begin to rub. I let the speed build as I rub and rub her clit and suck and lick at her breasts. Her hips are now moving against my hand. She's so eager and so responsive. I feel my dick getting harder and harder. She's getting close, her breath is shallow, sweat has broken out over her body again and her hips are pushing fast at my hand. I leave her for only a moment to grab and use a condom then I move over her, spread her legs and enter her fast and hard. She gasps but continues to move her hips; this time it's against mine and I'm meeting her thrust for thrust. It doesn't take long until we're both tumbling over again.


	10. Chapter 10

I wake up with a kink in my neck. I'm pinned to the bed and my neck is at a weird angle. I try to shift and move to a more comfortable position but I'm trapped where I am. As I pull rather than push, Sid pulls me hard against him and snuggles his face into my neck. I still can't move but at least I'm more comfortable now. The feel of Sid's naked body against mine reminds me of our 'adult time' together. My body is stiff and sore but very satisfied. All I want to do is snuggle back into Sid and fall asleep but my watch tells me that it's 3am and I have the early shift at 5am. I'm so glad that Miss Sally told me that she was going to sleep over last night so that I could stay with Sid if I wanted to and I definitely wanted to; needed to.

I try to slip out of Sid's arms but he holds me firm to him. Damn, I'm going to have to wake him up. I try one last time to slip out of bed but can't.

"Sid?"

He moans but doesn't move.

"Sid, I'm sorry but I need to get up."

More moaning and he shifts to his back pulling me with him. I shake his shoulder now and keep going until I see signs of life.

"Cat, it's the middle of the night."

"I know and I'm sorry but I have to be at work for the 5am shift. I have just enough time to get home, shower and then take the bus to work."

"Ok, give me a minute."

"Don't get up. I can call a cab." As I say that though, I wonder how I'm going to pay for it.

"You are not taking a cab home" Sid says and I know he's awake now. "Shower here, I'll drive you home to get changed and then drop you at work."

"Oh Sid, no. You have practice and definitely need sleep."

"You didn't get any more than I did and you have to work a full shift on your feet."

I don't think arguing is going to get me anywhere with Sid.

"Ok, I'll shower here as you suggested. Go back to sleep, I'll shower and get ready."

I try to climb out of bed but Sid pulls me back to him and takes my lips on a searing kiss. It takes my breath away. I don't even notice mine or Sid's morning breath I'm so lost in the kiss.

When we part, Sid whispers "morning."

I chuckle and reply "good morning."

As I'm just finishing the last syllable, Sid climbs out of bed with me in his arms.

"Sid, put me down!"

He ignores me and walks into the bathroom then right into the shower. He turns it on still holding me and quickly hot water and steam fill the air. I thought Sid would put me down now but he simply walks under the double shower heads and drowns us both.

"Sid, put me down!"

Sid simply laughs and holds me closer. I continue to fight against him until we're both almost drowning from laughing so hard and breathing in water. Finally, sputtering, Sid lets me slide down. As my wet body slides down the full length of his, I lose my breath completely. When my feet hit the ground I slide my hands down Sid's chest, stomach and then back up until I've clutched his face. Sid's wet curls are plastered over his forehead. Water is dripping off of his nose. I pull his face down to mine for a hard kiss. Sid pulls me so close that I fear I'll go right through him. He backs me up until I'm flush against the shower wall.

Sid takes over the kiss and it is devastating. He doesn't simply take over; he possess. I feel like I'm being branded and just try to keeping up. Sid pushes my arms over my head and holds them there with one hand. His lips stay on mine and his free hand slides down my body between my legs. He pushes them apart and his fingers between my folds. He pushes two fingers inside of me hard and fast then simply holds them there, cupping me, possessing me. With my hands held hostage above me, and his fingers inside of me, I'm completely under his control. It's so incredibly arousing having Sid in control. My body isn't my own right now; it belongs to him and I'm along for the ride. Oh and what a ride it is as Sid begins to move his fingers inside of me.

First he swirls them around and around stretching me out slowly. Then he begins to pump in and out. I cry out with every move of his hand. The one holding my hands releases them and slides down one arm, over my shoulder and on to my breast. Sid slides his body down now so that he's kneeling in front of me. He pulls one leg over his shoulder which opens my legs to him. His mouth replaces his fingers until his tongue is deep inside me darting in and out. He continues to work me over and over. I hear continued cries screamed and don't even recognize my own voice. I have to use my hands on Sid's shoulders to keep myself from crumbling to the shower floor.

It takes me very little time now to reach my orgasm. When it comes, I simply slouch back against the wall and watch Sid stand and rinse himself in the spray before turning back to me. I lay my forehead against his chest and Sid chuckles. Before he can say anything, I take him in hand and he's rock hard. I shift until our positions are reversed and I continue to stroke him faster and faster. We don't have any condoms so I'll have to do this the old fashioned way. Sid got fully aroused while making me cum so it doesn't take long to get him there too. He throws back his head and lets out a low groan when he cums.

I lay kisses across Sid's chest as he works to catch his breath.

"If that's the way we wake up, I'll get up at 3am for you anytime" Sid tells me and I chuckle.

"We'll see how you feel after practice today without eight hours straight."

"I rarely get eight hours in a row Cat. I'll be fine. You're the one who is going work for eight hours after very little sleep."

"Fourteen" I say without thinking.

"Fourteen what?" He asks.

I pour some shampoo into my hands and start washing my hair.

"I have a double shift so it's fourteen hours tomorrow, well, today."

Sid turns me around to face him and he looks angry. Confused, I wait for him to continue.

"If you had to get up so early and work a double shift, why didn't you tell me? We could have made it an early night."

The frustration is clear to me but I'm still confused.

"Sid, this isn't the first time I've worked a double on very little sleep. I been up all night with a sick child before and worked a double. It's all part of being a mom. Besides, I wanted to be with you tonight."

Sid's face looks less angry and more contemplative. I rinse my hair and then soap up my body.

"It's not right that you have to work so hard Cat."

I shrug and rinse my whole body. When done I kiss Sid's cheek then step out of the shower to towel off. There are a few bath towels so Sid will have one too.

Sid joins me outside the shower after I've towel dried my hair and body.

"Do you have a dryer?" I ask. It's way too cold out there to go out with wet hair. Sid doesn't answer but reaches around me to take a hair dryer out of the cupboard. After using some of his hair gel, and he has quite a lot, I use the dryer while Sid leaves for the bedroom. When I'm done, I follow him out.

"Here's some clothes for you to wear" Sid points to the bed.

He's laid out some warm up pants and a sweatshirt. They're going to be huge but much better than putting my dress back on. Sid also has a bag out and I can see my dress and other items inside. After dressing, I sit to roll up the pants which are a foot too long. Then Sid sits beside me and rolls up my sleeves. When he's done, he takes my hand and kisses it.

"Cat, you work too hard babe. You need to take care of yourself more."

"Sid, I've been doing this for a few years now. I know what I can handle and I'm ok, really."

I smile at him but he's still frowning. He doesn't say any more about it so I guess he's let it go. Instead he stands and helps me up.

"I have Crocks that might work for to go home with" he says so I nod. Once I'm in the socks and bright yellow crocks, we head down to Sid's truck.

We drive to my place in silence but it's full of meaning. Sid took my hand immediately after he started the truck and hasn't let go. Considering everything we done to each other this evening, holding hands shouldn't really be intimate and yet it is.

When we get to my building, Sid insists on walking me to my apartment. He holds me close to him as we do. At my door, I unlock it and turn to him where he gathers me into his arms. I simply breathe him in smelling the soap we both used and the fragrance that is uniquely Sid.

"I don't want to leave your arms" I confess.

"I don't want you to leave them either."

We stay there a few moments then I sigh and say "ok, I need to get changed. Come in but please be quiet."

Sid follows me in and I head to the bedroom while he sits on the sofa. Lizzy is in a deep sleep like only children can. Miss Sally is sleeping too. I grab my clothes and some clean underwear then go to the bathroom to change. Once I'm ready for work, I head back out to meet Sid.

"I'll wash the clothes and return them to you later" I whisper to him.

He pulls me down to his lap and we have a serious make out session; even if it is too brief.

"Seriously, Sid, I need to get to work." I tell him laughing and pull him off of the sofa with me.

Begrudgingly, Sid follows me out of the apartment and down to his truck. Again, Sid takes my hand after starting the car. When he pulls into the parking lot, the diner is dark. It looks like Tessa hasn't arrived yet.

"We beat Tessa. She should be along soon if you want to get going."

Sid replies "yeah right" then pulls me to his side.

I can't stop touching him and it seems that the feeling is mutual. Sid pushes his seat back and pulls me onto his lap.

"Don't go getting any ideas Sid. Tessa will be here soon and then you need to leave so that I can work."

He just chuckles and captures my lips with his own. That began our second make out session of the morning; if you don't count the shower fun. God, this man can kiss. His lips are soft and full as they move over mine and I can't help but take the bottom one between my teeth. I feel his lips curve for a second and then he pulls back slightly so that I release his lip. He quickly attacks mine; the kiss goes deep and hard fast. I am left trying to keep up and lose myself in the moment. All I know is Sid's lips over mine, his tongue sweeping my mouth and his hands everywhere.

I shift and, with some effort, manage to straddle him which gives me much more access to his body. Of course, he has more access to mine. Sid's hands pull my shirt out of my pants so that he can push his hands inside and cup my naked ass. As he does, he shifts my core closer and I can feel him harden and push at me through his jeans. I change the angle of the kiss so that I can taste him better but that's not enough. I abandon his lips to travel down his jaw and stop at his ear. I remember something from last night so I sink my teeth into his ear lobe and am rewarded with a deep groan that I feel right down to my core. My hips reflexively grind into him. I know that I 'm losing control. I am aware, vaguely, that we're parked in the lot at my diner where Tessa could come any moment. I just can't seem to care. I crave Sid like I've never felt before. I need to feel him deep inside of me, pushing and filling me completely, enough to make me scream loud.

We fly apart when a car horn sounds. I look out the front window and it's fogged up; all of the windows are fogged up but I can tell that the horn came from a car close to us. That's when I hear my phone go off. It's Tessa and she's texted me.

'I assume that's you and the hockey god in the truck with fogged up windows'

"It's Tessa" I tell Sid.

I text her back 'yeah, sorry Tess. I'll be in, give me a min'

I look at Sid and his face is flushed, he's breathing hard and, looking at his lap, I can tell it's not just his breathing that's hard. Unfortunately, I'm too embarrassed by Tessa catching us to finish what we started. I also remember that we are out in public. I lean my head back against the rest and try to catch my breath telling my body that it isn't fully aroused and in need of release.

"Ok, I really need to go inside" I say and glance over at Sid. Bad idea; now I want to jump him again.

"Ok, I'm really leaving" I give him a quick kiss on his cheek and evade his try to grab me. "Seriously, Sid, I can't."

"Fine but I'm taking a rain check for later" he calls to me. Before I can close the door, I hear Sid call to me so I lean back in the car.

"Yes" I say and lean in. He has the sweetest look on his face now; it's boyish and beautiful.

"You are truly incredible Cat. I leave tomorrow after practice. Can I come by tonight?" He asks me hesitantly.

I give him a huge smile "of course. Text me when you're done practice" I say before closing the door and head to the diner. Oh boy, I'm in so much trouble.

I'm dragging my ass. There is no other way to describe it except that I'm completely dragging my tired ass. Practice is short at least and we work on a few plays; the power play still sucks wind and we need to fix it, fast. A shortened season doesn't give you much room for errors of any kind. The gym is what I need. A hard, long workout will sweat some of the tired out of me. It also helps me to focus so that I don't continue to relive every moment of last night. I never anticipated that we'd have sex not to mention Cat actually spending the night; well, most of the night. What blew me away even more was, well, how good it was. Cat was, is, incredible. I'm still reeling from the best sex I've ever had last night. I thought since she was so young and had a three year old that Cat would be inexperienced.

Hmm, that makes me wonder. At twenty one, how much experience has she had and from who? She didn't want to talk about Lizzy's father when it came up. She said that she's been in foster homes since she was really young but didn't want to talk about that either. Who is Lizzy's father and where the fuck is he? Why isn't he taking care of his child so that Cat doesn't need to work so fucking hard?

"Sid, if you're just going to scowl and mutter at the weights then get your ass up so that others can, ok?"

I look over and see Craig and Brooksy.

"Sorry guys, my mind wandered. I'm done" I tell them and get up.

After some stretches to cool down, I head to the locker room but grab my phone before I shower. It's 2pm. Cat will still be at work and beginning her second shift. I wish she didn't have to work so hard. Again I wonder where the douche father is and want to punch him for abandoning his family. He didn't need to stay with Cat, I wouldn't have met her if that happened, but he should be taking care of his responsibilities.

'How's work?' I text her.

'Just finishing a break. How are you?'

'Exhausted but at least I'm finished. Are you dead on your feet?'

'Not quite. I think I've got my second wind.'

'You'll need a third one before the day is done.'

'I just might lol'

This gives me an idea.

'I'll come pick you up after work' I text her.

'You don't have to do that' she texts back.

I'm glad that she can't see me roll my eyes.

'I'm not doing it because I have to. I want to.'

'I'll need to go straight home so that I can put Lizzy to bed and spend some time with her'

Does she think I only want one thing now? I'll have to fix that.

'That's good, I'll get to see Lizzy again'

'Ok, if you're sure'

'Would you stop, I'm sure. What time?'

'Probably 6:30'

'Good, see you then'

She sends back a winky face that makes me chuckle. I can see her winking at me herself. I'm glad that I can pick her up. It worries me that she would take the bus home after a double shift and on three hours sleep. At least I was able to go home and grab some more before heading into the rink.

I don't want to wait to see her; 6:30 feels like an eternity away. I see Neal and Tanner come into the locker room.

"You guys want to grab some lunch?" I ask them.

They both say "sure."

After we shower and are heading to our cars, Nealer asks me "where do you want to go?"

"I have a great spot in mind" I tell him with a huge smile on my face.


	11. Chapter 11

I was just running out of my second wind and exhaustion is weighing on me when he walks in. I notice that he has others with him but not who they are; I only have eyes for Sid. He spots me quickly and treats me to a huge smile.

"Well, guess someone couldn't get enough" I hear Tessa say behind me.

I look back at her and try to give her a scowl but I just can't stop smiling. Tessa swats my shoulder and moves to greet the guys. Usually, people seat themselves. We have one waitress for the counter, or Tessa does if we're not busy, and I cover the tables. Today Tessa must decide that she wants to pay attention to Sid and his friends. I wonder why?

I watch her greet them and show them to an empty area where she can push two tables together. There are eight of them. I wonder why Sid brought so many of his team mates; at least I think they are team mates. Tessa confirms that when she comes back to the counter.

"There's the top two offense and defensive lines for the Pens in my diner. Well almost all of them. Do you think that they would take a picture with the sign? Oh, maybe I can have them sign something." Tessa runs off to the kitchen and leaves me alone to fill up water glasses for the guys.

I make my way over to their table and deliberately don't stand directly beside Sid. Do his team mates know about me? What does it mean if they do? What does it mean if they don't? Shit, I'm losing my mind.

"Hi guys, you liked us so much that you came back and brought friends" I say to the table at large. Two of the guys who were here last time are back; well, three if you count Sid.

I place everyone's water in front of them which means that I have to pass by Sid. As I place his glass down I feel a wandering hand on my thigh briefly.

"We come for you cherie" the man I remember as Marc says.

"That ring on your finger says that you might want to be putting your attention elsewhere ma cherie" I reply.

The guys all laugh, including Sid. I may be reading his expression all wrong but he looks happy that I'm teasing Marc.

"Ok guys, what would you like?"

I take everyone's order and head to the kitchen to place the order. I then grab the drink orders and take them to the table. The guys are taking about something that happened at practice. They all seem to be ganging up on the tallest guy that they call Bortz. As I glance at Sid before leaving the table, he gives me a wink and then turns his attention back to the conversation.

I take care of my other customers and run food. The whole time I'm wondering why Sid hasn't introduced me to his team mates. I mean, he doesn't need to say 'I had sex with her last night, and again this morning' but he could say that I'm a friend. For the first time I wonder if Sid is embarrassed to be dating a waitress. I bet most of his team mates have beautiful girlfriends who have college degrees and don't have to work. I've never thought of that before. I am nowhere near like the girls Sid could get and has probably dated. "Cat, order up" I hear from the kitchen.

The guys' lunch is ready so I bring it out to them. They're still laughing and joking around and a cheer goes up when they see the food.

I check back with them a few times as I serve my other customers too. The food here is all made from scratch; it's not creative but it is homemade comfort food and delicious. They all seem to enjoy the meal and the empty dishes I clear away look licked clean.

When I bring the bill, I set it in the middle of the table since they didn't ask for separate ones. We would do it but I hate to because it's a lot of work. The guys slide it down to the end of the table and Sid.

"You're the one with the huge new contact" one of the guys calls out.

"How long are you guys going to milk that?" Sid asks as he pulls out a credit card.

I leave with it and get our portable card machine. When it's set I hand it to Sid and clear away the remaining dishes. I see that the guys are getting ready to go so I head back. Maybe now that they are ready to leave, Sid will introduce me but I'm disappointed when he doesn't and instead waves goodbye like the rest.

Fuming inside, I take the card machine and pull out our copy. That's when I notice that Sid has given me a 50% tip. What the fuck? He doesn't introduce me to his friends and then tries to buy me off. Seriously, what the fuck?

* * *

I can't believe that so many of the guys wanted to come to lunch. Sure I asked Glass and Bortz but when Flower heard where we were going he invited himself and started asking guys until we had eight of us.

I worried all the way there what Cat would think. I definitely don't want her thinking that I was bragging to the guys so they came to check her out. Having sex changes everything especially for someone like Cat with so little experience; although she sure didn't seem inexperienced last night.

I decided to say nothing to the guys about Cat and me. When she left after taking our order, Flower gave me a really weird look. I still don't know what his problem was but he'll tell me if it was important. I definitely don't want the guys ragging on me about Cat. It's just not right to talk about her the way the guys all talk about most girls.

As I now drive back to the diner to pick up Cat, I'm more confused than ever about, well, everything. I want to be selfish about the relationship with Cat, if that's what it is, and put off as long as possible the circus that will ensue when everyone knows that we're together.

I pull into a spot and turn off the car. Just as I get out, Cat comes out the door. I meet her half way across the parking lot and bend down to kiss her. She offers me her cheek which feels very awkward and makes me worried although I can't put my finger on why.

"How was the rest of the afternoon?" I ask Cat once we're in the truck.

"Good, long but good" she replies.

Ok, something is really wrong here. We've been so easy with each other since we first met so this awkwardness is really weird. Is it because we had sex? Has she had the whole day to think and regrets it? It feels like we're strangers right now. What the fuck? Ok, I've had enough of this; we need to figure this out. I turn to Cat the second after I pull the car over.

"What's going on Cat?"

She looks stunned and asks "what do you mean?"

She looks really surprised. It doesn't seem like an act and I've never seen Cat be untruthful.

"Cat, are you upset that I came to the diner this afternoon? Was it that I brought some of the guys with me? I didn't tell them anything, really. Flower knows but I can't ever hide anything from him. I really didn't tell them anything."

"That's the problem Sid! You said nothing. Are you embarrassed of me? Were you just trying to get me into bed? You fucked me and now you're done with me?"

"Holy shit! No Cat, don't think that, ever."

This is why she's been so weird and distant. She thinks I am embarrassed of her; that I only wanted a quick fuck. That thought bothers me more than I can take.

I gently cup Cat's face in my hands and turn it up to my own.

"Cat, I don't know what this is or where it's going but don't you ever, ever think for a moment that I'm embarrassed of you or only want to fuck you! You are very important to me; both you and Lizzy. Ok?"

Her eyes are wet and confused but she nods quietly at me. I offer her a small smile that she returns. Her eyes may be wet still but she looks like my Cat again.

I lean down and take her lips softly with my own. She returns the kiss hesitantly at first but then with more feeling and I feel myself centre again. We each pull back and smile. Cat's smile slowly turns to confusion.

"What is it Cat?" I was her.

She pauses, then asks "why didn't you tell them about me Sid?"

I wipe a tear from her eye and reply "do you know how athletes talk about girls in the locker room."

She looks more confused so I continue. "Let's just say that it's not the way you want them talking about someone you care about. We've only started dating so they wouldn't think it's serious and, I don't know, maybe there wouldn't be anything but I don't want that for you. Also, once it's out there then everything will change and I don't want anything to change right now. I want to spend more time with you and Lizzy. I want us to keep getting to know each other. I won't apologize for also wanting much more of what we did last night."

I pause now. I got carried away there and need to make sure that Cat is ok. Damn, I can't read her eyes right now. Did I go too far?

"Last night, or this morning?" She asks with her lips curving slightly.

"Both" I tell her. She chuckles.

"Ok. I'm sorry if I got a little crazy" Cat says.

"I'm sorry" I reply. "I thought I was doing the right thing."

Cat leans in and kisses me. "You were Sid. We just need to communicate a little better I guess."

Hmm, I guess we just had our first argument. Not pleasant but not a tragedy either.

"What do you say we get you home?"

Cat smiles and replies "good idea."

After a searing kiss, I put the car in gear and pull back into traffic. Once I park in front of Cat's apartment, I pull her to me again until she's on my lap and wrapped around me. He lips dive into mine and we move constantly to get the best angle. The kiss goes deeper and deeper and on and on. Cat shifts so that she's straddling me and begins grinding against me. My dick instinctively twitches at the contact and my hands cup her ass to pull her even closer.

"God, I need to be buried deep inside of you. I need to feel your muscles contract around me and milk me for everything I have." Wow, I've never been this vocal or demanding before. Cat moans from deep inside her and pushes harder against me. I guess she likes it. Oh fuck, we're in my car in front of her apartment building. We really need to stop.

"Cat, wait, we can't do this here."

She pulls back and her eyes are wild but I start seeing recognition come into them. It looks like she forgot where we were too. She pulls away from me and sits on the passenger side again. I try to slow my breathing and convince my dick that it won't explode.

"Ok, wow, ok. We need to stop this and inside. Lizzy will be at the door waiting for me to come home. She's going to be very happy to see you too."

I smile at that because I'm looking forward to seeing Lizzy.

We both get out of the car and walk hand in hand up to the building and then to Cat's apartment. The cold air of winter helps with my 'condition.' Cat now sooner has touched the door to the apartment when it is pulled open.

"Mommy!" Lizzy cries and throws herself at Cat who catches her easily. There are lots of kisses and hugs until Lizzy notices me.

"Sidwee, Sidwee, Sidwee!" Lizzy bounces in Cat's arms and reaches for me. Chuckling, I reach out for her and take her in my arms. As she likes to do, Lizzy grabs each of my cheeks so that she can look directly at me.

"Sidwee!"

"Hi there princess. How are you?"

Instead of answering, Lizzy puckers her lips and waits for a kiss. I'm unsure what to do so I look at Cat and she smiles then nods. I give Lizzy's lips a light kiss and carry her into the apartment.

"Hello there Cat. Sid, nice to see you" Miss Sally says as she's putting her coat on. I know that she often has dinner with the girls so I say "don't run off on my account Miss Sally."

"I can't stay Sid. I have my knitting group tonight." She kisses Lizzy's cheek and then mine before she heads out the door.

As we walk further into the apartment, I ask Cat "does she really have a knitting club?"

"She does although it's not tonight" Cat replies and laughs. I guess if Cat's not upset then I shouldn't be either. Miss Sally wanted to give us some time together.

"How's my princess? Are you feeling better?" I ask Lizzy.

"Pincess Lizzy" she says back to me and then wiggles out of my arms before running off to the bedroom.

I hang up my jacket and take off my shoes then follow Cat into the kitchen.

"Wow, it smells delicious in here" I tell her.

"Thanks, I always have stuff in the freezer for Miss Sally to heat up in case I work late. We're having chili tonight."

"Can I help?" I ask.

"Sidwee, Sidwee! Pincess, pincess!"

I turn back to watch Lizzy run into the room with a crown on her head. I catch her as she runs up.

"Yes, you are such a beautiful princess Lizzy." I nuzzle her neck and she giggles. Of course that makes me laugh too. I nuzzle her neck again and she giggles and wiggles in my arms. Her giggle is infectious and so much fun. When I stop, she lays her head between my neck and shoulder and sighs. It's a very sweet sound.

"If the two of you are done playing, would you like to sit down for dinner?" Cat says.

I notice that the table is set for the three of us with Lizzy's booster seat on one of the chairs. We all have orange juice at our plates. I place Lizzy in her booster but have no idea how to do up the buckles and stuff.

"I can do it Sid" Cat steps in and shows me how. It's actually much easier than I would have thought.

Cat scoops up some chili for each of us and then we dig in.

The dinner is very simple, very delicious and a lot of fun. Lizzy is completely enchanting. She loves Dora the Explorer and tells me all about Dora's latest adventures. I'm glad I spend so much time with Duper's kids so I know who Dora is. After dinner, I insist on cleaning up the kitchen so that Cat can spend some time with her daughter. As I'm finishing, they head to bath time. When I come back into the living room, the Ranger/Philly game is on. I settle into the sofa and get right into the game. Callahan gets plastered into the boards by Hartnall in a dirty play.

"Fuck me" I say. Callahan is still on the ice, rolling around and clutching his knee.

"Bad word Sidwee."

I look over and Lizzy is shaking her finger at me. Double fuck. I forgot there were little ears around.

"You're right Lizzy. I'm sorry. I really shouldn't use bad words."

"Yes, you really shouldn't Sid" Cat says as she comes into the room smiling at me. "Ok Lizzy, say good night to Sidney. It's time for bed."

Lizzy runs up to the sofa and climbs up on my lap. She grabs both of my cheeks and says "tuck me in Sidwee."

She's so adorable. "Ok princess, let's take you to bed."

I stand up with her in my arms and follow Cat into their bedroom. I tuck Lizzy into bed and pull the covers up to her chin.

"Goodnight Lizzy, sweet dreams" I tell her and then kiss her puckered lips.

Cat says goodnight too and we head to the living room. I pull Cat into my arms on the sofa where she lays her head on my shoulder and yawns.

"Do you want me to get going Cat? You must be exhausted."

"No, don't go and yes I am."

I chuckle and hold her closer. We sit together for a while with only the TV providing any sound. It's a wonderful and comforting feeling. It reminds me of when I stayed at the Lemieux's; family dinners, bed times for kids and the adults left to relax when everyone was finally asleep.

"When do you get back" Cat asks sleepily. She knows that I'm leaving tomorrow.

"We leave after practice tomorrow, stay in Philly overnight, play the next day and then fly back after the game."

"Isn't it a really long day if you fly home after the game?"

"Not really. We're usually too keyed up to sleep directly after; looking for food first."

"Miss Sally said that Philly is like an arch enemy of yours and that it's going to be an ugly game."

She's been asking about the Pens. I feel like a kid who finds out that the girl likes him.

"Yeah, it's usually an ugly game. It's very physical and with a lot of history between the clubs. It's always a high charged game. You might not want to let Lizzy watch any on it."

"That bad huh?"

"It's an unfriendly game with lots of fights."

"Do you fight?" She asks me.

"Not a lot, three or four times in my whole career."

"Why did you fight?"

"There were a lot of reasons. Sometimes we fight if another player goes after one of ours. Once I fought to try and spar my team on and add energy to the game. It's usually not my role but I've done it."

"Oh."

There's a lot of meaning in that one word.

"I've been in the league for eight years and I've fought a handful of times. Some guys do it every night. It's not something that I look for Cat, honestly."

She tilts her face up to me. Slowly her frown turns into a small smile. I lean down to take her lips with mine. The kiss is soft and sweet. We sip at each other's slips slowly. Cat turns slightly so that she is facing me more. Her fingers slide up over my cheek and slides into my hair. She softly mews as I slide my tongue over her lips and she gives me entry. We continue to slowly play until Cat yawns. She's clearly exhausted.

"Cat, I'm going to head out. You've had a long day and I still need to pack for tomorrow. Ok?"

She nods, gives me one last kiss and then stands up. I put on my coat and shoes then take Cat in my arms.

"I'll text you. A lot" I tell her.

"Good" she responds.

We share a few more kisses and then I leave. Just as I hear the door clicking behind me, it opens again. I turn around. Cat probably wants a few more kisses and I wouldn't mind either.

"I forgot Sid. You can't buy me; you need to remember that. Keep your fucking tips!"

I'm stunned when the door slams shut. What the hell just happened?


	12. Chapter 12

Oh my God! Did I just do that? I meet this great guy, incredible guy, who cleans up after dinner so that I can spend time with my daughter and I've just yelled at him somewhat hysterically; ok, totally hysterically yelled at him. After he left and I shut the door is when I remembered the tip. I guess I'm still hot thrilled that he didn't introduce me to his friends even though he explained. When I remembered the tip, the extravagance of it, I just lost it. Oh God! Have I just screwed everything up? He's leaving tomorrow too. Ok, I have to fix this; I grab some shoes, my keys and am prepared to chase him to his car if I have to so that I can talk to him.

I run out of my door and directly into Sid. I bounce off of his chest; thankfully he grabs me so that I don't fall to the floor behind me. We stand here now just staring at each other with my hands on his chest and his holding my arms. I guess I should say something.

"Can you come back in for a few minutes?" I ask.

"Of course" he answers.

I stand back to let him in, which he does, and then we're simply staring at each other again.

"First, I apologize for what I said. It wasn't exactly the best way to say it and it's not even what I mean, so, I'm sorry."

"Ok" he says and his expression is incomprehensible.

Yeah, this really isn't going to be easy.

"There are two things that are bothering me Sid. First, you gave me a 50% tip. I don't think you're trying to buy me at all; but, if you're trying to help me then you need to know that it feels almost the same. I was on welfare for a year and I worked my ass off to get off of it, pay my own way and rely on no one. I take care of my daughter myself and I'm not looking for anyone, including you, to pay my way. I didn't even know that you were some huge hockey star when we met. I don't want anyone, especially you, thinking that I'm dating you for your money."

Ok, there, it's out. Now I guess it's in his hands to figure out what to do next.

"Cat, did you think that the tip meant that I was trying to help you out financially? Is that what you're saying?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, you paying for dinner when we go out is one thing but giving me so much for a tip is actually giving me money."

I watch him smile now. "Ok, I get it. Here's the thing, I didn't do it on purpose."

He's chuckling now but I'm still confused. "Did you mean to only give me 5% and added a zero by mistake?"

He laughs harder now. "No Cat, I always tip high. The bill was really low, since it's a diner, so I added even more I guess. That's the only reason; honest."

Well now I feel like an idiot. He didn't even mean to give me that big of a tip; he meant it to be that big just didn't connect that it was to me. He's still smiling at me.

"I guess I overreacted then, huh?" I feel like an idiot.

"Just a little" he replies smiling. "Were you coming after me?"

"Yeah, I felt bad at the way I yelled at you. Let's just say it's too much pride and I'm too exhausted to think straight right now." I offer him a smile of my own.

He tilts his head and opens his arms which I fall into quickly. Sid kisses the top of my head.

"Well you are a very silly woman if you think I see you as anything but strong and self-reliant. Would I love to help you out? Yes but only because you work so hard and I do have a lot of money."

I can tell that he's trying to joke about it so I swat his ass and say "bragger."

"Are we ok?" Sid asks me.

I tilt up to look at him and say "yeah. We're ok Sid."

He leans in to kiss me and the sweet moment quickly becomes heated. I grab his shoulders to pull him down to him. Instead, Sid lifts me so that I'm straddling him and wrapped in his arms. I shut the door behind him and Sid walks us to the sofa while keeping me wrapped in his arms. I drag my lips from his and kiss over his cheek, jaw and down his neck. I retrace my journey back to his plump, soft lips. Sid's tongue slips between my lips and slides over my own. I feel one of his hands slide down to pull my core closer to him. My hips instinctively rotate into his while my hands feast in his hair and I tilt my head to take our kiss even deeper. Sid's free hand slides under my tee shirt and up my back until he unhooks my bra. With my breasts free, Sid brings his hand down to my waist until he can brush my nipple with his thumb. I moan deep and low into his mouth while my hips push hard against his.

I can feel him harden, push against my core now and it spurs me on. I use my hands in his hair to pull his head back so that I can lick and nip down his neck, suck at his Adam's apple and then travel onto his ear. I bite down on his lobe and Sid pinches my nipple in response. I cry out this time.

"Ok?" Sid asks in a breathless voice.

I can't speak so I simply take his lips with my own again and take the kiss immediately deep and hard. Sid responds in kind and I find his other hand slide into my pants until he can fully cup my cheek. Oh God, what this man can do to me and I'm helpless to do anything but respond in kind. I grind against him again and Sid's huge, so huge, pushing against me. I need him inside of me in a very desperate way. I'm vibrating everywhere and my panties are soaked. There is no way I can let Sid leave now, not in this state for either of us. I pull away and look at his face. His lips are red and swollen from mine. He's sweating and flush with his hair forming curls where it meets his forehead. We can't do this here on the sofa; Lizzy is asleep but she could wake up. That's when I get the idea.

I take Sid's lips in one last searing kiss and then pull him with me as I stand. He looks puzzled but I turn and pull him with me. Outside the bedroom, Sid pulls back from me and his eyes widen, almost shocked. I shake my head and laugh before checking on Lizzy. She is sound asleep so I slip back out of the bedroom and softly shut the door.

Grabbing Sid's hand again, I pull him into the bathroom with me, lock the door, and start the shower; hot. When I turn back to him, Sid's smiling hugely and pulling off his shirt. I'm too ready to continue any further foreplay so I strip quickly too. When we're both in the shower and wet, Sid lifts me up onto the lip of the tube and wraps my leg around him.

"Shit" it hits me that I don't have condoms.

Slowly Sid figures it out but smiles. He's gone a minute and then is back quickly with a condom; thank God. I take it from him and he raises his eye brows. After opening the package, I kneel in front of him, take the base of his hard shaft in one hand and roll the condom very slowly over him with the other. I watch as his eyes close and his lips part so I continue even slower. When he's fully sheathed, I can't wait any more so I stand and Sid helps me up again. I feel his tip at my entrance and can feel my insides quiver at the thought of him filling me deep. He raises his eyebrows again and I nod. Sid slams into me hard and takes my breath away. I don't have time to catch it because we're moving together fast and hard. Our wet skin slaps together as we thrust faster and faster against each other. Sid fills me fully and I'm moaning quickly. I take his lips with my own so that I moan into his mouth and stay quiet. It takes no time for me to find my orgasm and I shake as it washes over me. I'm vaguely aware of Sid reaching his climax too.

I find Sid staring down at me when I can finally open my eyes. We both start laughing and I drop my forehead to his chest.

"We should argue more often" I tell him and Sid chuckles.

"I don't know about the argument part but I do love making up. Have I mentioned how delightful you are wet?"

Sid slides his hand over my hip. "Here" he says. His other hand finds my nipple. "Here" as his thumb slides over my wet nipple. The hand at my hip slides between us and he slips two fingers inside of me and says "definitely here." I'm still vibrating deep inside as his fingers begin to thrust and take me up again. His clever thumb finds my clit and I'm flying again quickly. I've never experienced this before. My body responds to his every caress, thrust and touch. I think I collapse in Sid's arms and he's the only reason that I'm still upright. I lean back and pull his lips down to mine. We kiss softly a few times. I can't resist sliding my hands over his chest. It's so smooth and hard.

"You better stop that or else you may not get any sleep tonight either" he tells me.

As I chuckle, I hand Sid the soap and use the shower for what it's really meant for; cleansing. Later, when I'm wrapped in my fluffy robe and lying on the sofa with Sid, I know that I've been thoroughly had. Sid is watching hockey, I don't even know who is playing, and I'm simply relaxing in his arms. Sated and in the warm of Sid's arms, there is only one thing a girl can do; I fall asleep.

* * *

I lay Cat in her bed desperately wishing that I could climb in with her. That's not possible of course with the little body in the other bed in the room. After pulling the covers over Cat and kissing her forehead, I go over to Lizzy and kiss her too. I take one last look at them both before I leave the room. They look very peaceful and could be sisters Cat looks so young in sleep.

I shut the door and grab my things in the living room. As I'm leaving the apartment it hits me: I don't have a key and her door will be unlocked when I leave. A quickly glance at the sofa shows me that it isn't an option; the floor would be more comfortable. The only option is to take Cat's key. I really don't want to wake her up. I leave a short note beside her keys letting her know that I have the door key. I'll leave it at Consol in an envelope for her. If I didn't have to leave for the road trip right after practice then I would bring it back myself. Miss Sally probably has a key so Cat won't be 100% without one.

I think back over the last twenty four hours. There have been some incredible highs, our first fight, our second fight and talking through everything that happened. I know a lot of guys who either dump girls when things get tough or when there's the smallest bump in the road. Of course none of these guys would ever date a girl who has a child. I think I fell for the child before the mom but it's been an incredible few weeks. Lizzy is wonderful, sweet and so much fun. Cat is ... I don't know how to finish that sentence. What is Cat to me?

I close off those thoughts when I arrive home and turn on Sports Centre to catch highlights. This shortened season has been weird. The whole thing feels like the playoffs. We're playing more games than usual in this time frame. It's been really intense and the rankings seem to change daily except that the Blackhawks can't seem to lose in regulations. I'm happy for Toews but that little shit Kane is a gifted asshole. Like Ovechkin, they have God given gifts that they've pissed away with partying. Of course I don't tell anyone what I really think but, fuck, how they can just piss it all away. Looks like the Hawks won again tonight. Wow, that's 10 in a row now. I shut everything off and head to bed.

After practice the next day, we all head to airport and taken off for Florida. It's so fucking cold right now that Florida is a welcome trip. On the way to the hotel, I call Cat.

"Hello hottie" Cat says when she picks up.

"Hi yourself" I reply.

"Oh Sid, I was talking about Florida."

"Ok, that was bad."

"Yeah, I guess it really was. How is Florida?" She asks me.

"It's sunny and warm. How's Pittsburgh?"

"Cold, wet, cold. Did I mention that it's cold?"

"Yeah, you did."

"Ok, what are you guys up to tonight?"

"We'll check in at the hotel and we'll probably go our own ways for dinner. Duper, Flower, Kuni and I plan to eat at the hotel. We want to watch the Ranger/Jersey game tonight."

"Even when you have a night off you watch hockey?"

"Yeah, well" I don't know what else to say.

"That's funny Sid. Oh, thank you for putting me in bed. I must have been exhausted not to notice."

"You're welcome. It was brutal not to jump in with you. Did you get your key?"

"Yeah, thanks. One of the guys from Consol actually brought it to the diner for me so I didn't have to go there. That was you, right?"

"I figured it would take you an hour by bus so this way you didn't have to go."

"You are a very sweet man Sid."

I can feel my face turn red and look around to make sure that no one is paying attention. Thankfully they're not.

"How's Lizzy today?" I ask to change the subject.

"She woke up this morning asking for her Sidwee."

I chuckle "you realize that she can just call me Sid."

"Yeah but it's so cute" she says.

"Yeah, it really is cute."

"Well, she was very disappointed to wake up and find you gone. She walk around saying 'Sidwee, pengun' over and over. It was pitiful and really cute."

"I'll come by as soon as I'm home. Well, not as soon as since it will be around 2am. What are you working that day?"

"That would be great. She will love seeing you. Hang on while I grab my schedule. Ok, I have a double shift tomorrow but I'm off the next day. What time works for you?"

Hearing that she's off gives me and idea. "Is it ok if I have a surprise for you?"

She's quiet for a moment then says "ok. What kind of surprise?"

"No way. If it's a surprise then it's a surprise. No cheating" I reply.

"Fine, it can be a surprise."

"I can hear you sulking over the phone Cat. It will be fun, I promise. I'll have a car pick you up and will text you when I have the details."

"What do you mean you'll have a car pick us up? We'll just take the bus Sid. It's only one bus to Consol."

This woman really doesn't want anything. She's going to have to except this one.

"Cat, stop. A car will pick you up."

"Fine. I guess it will be cold out. Thanks."

I can't believe she agreed so easily. I must be wearing her down.

"Good. I'll arrange everything. It will probably be about 10:30am when the car will be there. Oh, dress Lizzy warmly. Maybe snow suit."

"Ok, what do you have planned Sid?"

"It's a surprise! You'll have to wait and see."

"Ok, we'll just wait to be surprised. Do you guys have a team meeting tonight?"

"Nope, just dinner and the game. Tomorrow we'll have a light on ice practice and then we'll have a team meeting about the game plan."

"Then back to the hotel for your game day nap."

I can hear the laughter in her voice. "Yes. Then back to the hotel for a nap. You find that funny huh?"

"It is funny. First, you're grown men who regularly nap. Second, next to the game, it's your favourite part of the day. That's funny Sid."

"Keep laughing Cat. You know, there are studies that prove the most important factor in a professional athlete's performance during the season is the amount of sleep they get."

"Now you're just making things up Sid. Seriously!"

"Sid, you coming?" I hear Duper call from the front of the bus.

"Yeah coming" I yell and notice that I'm the last person left on the bus. "I have to go Cat. We're at the hotel."

"Ok, if I don't talk to you, good luck tomorrow."

"Cat, we'll talk or at least text before then."

"Ok" she says softly.

"I'll call you later, ok?"

"Ok, bye."

"Bye" I say and hang up.

I quickly get off the bus and am surrounded by fans for autographs. I sign and take pictures before heading into the hotel. Security is at the door in case anyone tries to follow us in.

"Seriously Sid, who were you talking to on the phone?" Neal asks me.

I ignore him and get my key. Neal, Duper, Flower and Brooks follow me into the elevator.

"Come on Sid, tells us" Neal keeps at me.

I know this game and exactly how to react. I say nothing.

"You're hiding her, aren't you Sid? What's wrong with her? Is she fat? Old? Mother of four?" Neal keeps going and laughs at his own 'jokes.' I glance at Flower as we get off the elevator and shake my head at him. I know that Flower wants to stand up for me since he knows about Cat; but, Neal is just being Neal. He doesn't know about Cat and I want to keep it that way for now.

We all head to our own rooms when we get off of the elevator and I can hear Neal calling after me. I continue to ignore him. I've just taken my coat and jacket off when the adjoining door knocks. I let Duper in.

"Hey Sid, you know Nealer is just being an ass, right?"

"Yeah I know."

Duper doesn't ask any further questions; that's one of the things that I appreciate the most about him. He supports me in anything and lets me talk in my time and in my way. The question is: am I ready to talk about Cat?

Duper turns on the TV and begins looking for a sports channel. He finds one as they start a story on me. I hate watching shit about myself on TV. This one is focused on my points since coming back from concussion. Every time they do a report about me it's always in relation to the concussion. I can't wait until I can stop answering questions about the fucking concussion. That was the worse time of my life and I hate reliving it every time they talk to me about anything. Duper knows that and changes the channel quickly. He finds ESPN and settles there.

I put my shaving kit in the bathroom and walk back into the bedroom where Duper is checking his phone and laughing.

"Kody has been texting me the last couple of road trips. His spelling is interesting but I can get the basics of it." Duper looks so happy as he talks about his son. It makes me think of Lizzy. Maybe I could call Cat and talk to Lizzy. I'd love to hear about her 'pengun' and call me 'Sidwee.' She can't text yet of course but we could talk. I love how she tells me about Dora and keeps asking me about the 'pengun' and when she can see him again.

"Sid?"

I turn when Duper says my name. I didn't hear a thing he's said except for my name. He looks concerned.

"Ok Duper, I'll tell you what's going on." I pause and Duper waits for me to continue. "At the kids' thing a few weeks ago, I met a woman and her little girl. The woman's name is Cat, short for Catherine and her daughter is Lizzy. She's incredible Duper. She's three years old and loves penguins."

"Wow Sid, that's great. She sounds adorable. What about the mom?"

How do I describe Cat?

"She's young Dupe, twenty one, but she's raising her daughter alone. She's incredible."

"And hot?" Duper asks with a smile. I know that from Duper, it's a very different question than the other guys.

"Very" I tell him think back to our 'shower' last night and can't help the huge smile on my face.

"That's great Sid. Wait a minute! Is this the little waitress from the diner?"

I nod to him.

"Well, shit Sid. She's cute and funny too."

"Yeah, it's been, I don't know Dupe. It's incredible. She's incredible." I don't want to share the details of Cat's childhood with Duper; it's her story, not mine. "She's had a shitty childhood and yet she's made so much out of her life including being a great mom. She knew nothing about hockey too. Had no idea who I was or what we do. It's great to only be who I am. You know?"

Duper smiles at me. "Yeah, of course I get. You've been around Mario's kids enough and mine to know that kids are everything Sid. It moves you from date one to date twelve when there are kids involved."

He's saying what I've thought and what Cat's expressed. "Yeah, and Cat and I talked about not involving Lizzy, at least up front; but, that blew apart quickly. So I guess we've moved to date twelve and we'll have to deal."

Duper's silent for a moment then replies "you're a great guy Sid but keep in mind that there are more than two people involved and one of you has a very tiny, very fragile heart."

Again, Duper says what I've been thinking. Before I can respond, there's a banging on the door and I hear Brooksy say "let's eat!" I let the guys into my room so that we can watch the game and order up dinner. Duper still looks pensive but I put it out of my mind.

* * *

"Sidwee Sidwee Sidwee" Lizzy is lying on the floor kicking and screaming because she want to see Sid. This is something I was concerned about; Lizzy won't understand that Sid travels and that she can't see him any time that she wants. She's been screaming for him for almost five minutes now. Nothing will distract her and I just need to ride it out. The terrible threes are definitely a challenge.

My phone rings and I fully intend on ignoring it since Lizzy's volume is at an all-time high. When I see that it's Sid, I decide to answer it: after all, he's seen the meltdown first hand, hearing it over the phone won't be too different.

"Hi Sid."

"Hi, is that Lizzy? What's wrong? Have you called an ambulance?"

I can't help smiling; he's the sweetest.

"There's nothing wrong Sid. Lizzy is fine. She just throwing the world class of fits right now."

I walk toward the kitchen so that the screaming isn't directly in my ear.

"Oh, what is she upset about?" He asks me.

So, do I tell him? Will he think it's too much that she's upset because she wants to see him? Is it too much too fast? Shit. This is one of the things that I have no experience with and, although Sid is a great guy, he is a guy but not Lizzy's dad. I don't want him to think that I'm trying to force anything.

I guess I've been quiet for too long because Sid asks "are you there Cat?"

"Yeah, sorry. She's, um, upset because she wants to see you and she can't."

Ok, there, it's out.

"Oh" is all he says in response. A million meanings can be in that one tiny word.

"Put her on the phone" he continues.

I'm too stunned to move for a moment.

"Really?" I ask.

"Yes, really. Put her on the phone Cat."

"Ok" I tell him.

First I put him on speaker. "Ok Sid you're on speaker. You may want to turn down the volume."

Then I go towards the sobbing.

"Lizzy" I say and she turns to me. The sobbing intensifies when she sees that I'm back.

"Lizzy, if you stop crying and use your words then I have a surprise for you. But you only get the surprise if you behave like a big girl" I tell her.

Lizzy contemplates what I've said and I can see her deciding if she wants to stop or keep on with the tantrum. I sit on the sofa while I wait. A moment later, Lizzy stands and walks to me. I wipe her tears away and help her blow her nose. She has the crying hiccups now but all of the tears and screaming are gone.

"Ok Lizzy. Use your words and tell me why you are upset."

The classes all say that between the ages three and four is when the child has enough words that they can start articulating what the feel or want; but, it will be a process to get them to stop crying and talk instead. I see her eyes get wet again.

"Lizzy" I say in warning. "Tell me with your words what you want.

"Sidwee! I want my Sidwee!"

The tears threaten again but only because she so distraught and not because of a tantrum this time.

"Well I have a surprise for you sweetheart. Do you want to say hello now" I say toward the phone now.

"Hi princess" Sid replies.

Lizzy's tearful eyes widen in happy surprise.

"Sidwee? Sidwee!"

She grabs the phone from me and hugs it to her chest. It's so incredibly sweet. I feel tears come into my eyes.

"Yes princess, it's me. I hear that you miss me so I thought I'd call to say hello" the white lie comes out. It's very sweet of him.

"Sidwee, Sidwee, Sidwee." Lizzy repeats over and over dancing with the phone.

I find myself laughing as Sid tries to talk to Lizzy but she keeps laughing and dancing. It's adorable.

"Lizzy, slow down sweetheart. Talk to Sidney."

"Sidwee?" She says after she stops.

"Yes Lizzy I'm here. How's my princess?"

"Pincess. Izzy a pincess" she tells him and then runs to the bedroom.

I'm about to follow her but she comes back out before I can leave the living room.

"Pincess" she shouts as she holds up the phone to her face.

"Sid, you can't see her right now but she is holding up the phone to show you that she is wearing her crown."

I hear Sid laugh then he asks "you have an iPhone, right?"

"Yeah" I reply.

"Do you have Facetime?"

"I didn't think of that. Hang on a minute. Lizzy let mommy see the telephone for a moment."

I can see the tears well up so I quickly say "Sidney isn't going anywhere. Let me change something so you can see him." I know she didn't really understand me but she does give me the phone. I connect to Facetime and his beautiful smile greets me.

"Hi beautiful" he says.

"Hi back."

"Sidwee!" Lizzy is tired of waiting so I hand her the phone so that she can see Sid.

"Hi princess. You look so beautiful in your crown."

"Thank you" she replies and looks at me.

"That's right Lizzy. You have very good manners" I tell her.

She beams at me and then turns her attention to Sid. He asks her questions about her day and Dora, her favourite show right now. They actually talk much longer than I would have thought that she had the attention span for although she does begin to droop. Lizzy leans against me on the sofa and puts the phone on my lap. As quickly as she was revved up, she turns off and falls asleep.

"Lizzy" I hear Sid say.

I pick up the phone so that I can see him.

"She has fallen asleep. Between the tantrum and excitement, she is exhausted." I look behind Sid and ask "are you in the bathroom?"

He chuckles. "Yeah, the guys all came to my room for dinner and to watch the game. I wanted some privacy" he says looking slightly embarrassed.

"Well I think it's sweet." I tell him. 'Sweet or secretive' a little voice in my head says. I ignore it.

"That little girl is sweet and so are you. I can't think about nothing else but the shower last night you know?"

"Me too although we need to be more careful about playing around on the sofa."

"Yeah, I thought about that too. I need to go Cat. Sleep tight. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Ok, night" and I turn off the phone. I know that I'll have sweet dreams for sure.


	13. Chapter 13

_**Author's Note: Thank you so much for your comments. I love hearing what you think about the story and Cat and Sid. They are still in the honeymoon phase of course but there's a lot more story to come ...**_

* * *

The car is waiting for Lizzy and me when we walk out the door of our apartment building. I didn't know what to expect; a limo, a car. It's a black SUV with tinted windows. A man dressed in black gets out of the car and approaches us as we get closer.

"Cat?" The driver asks.

"Yes" I say with a smile.

"I'm Lizzy" she jumps in.

"It's nice to meet you Lizzy. Mr. Crosby has asked me to take you both to the Consol Energy Centre. Are you ready to go?"

We both nod to the man and he opens the back door for us. That's when it hits me; what will we do about a car seat for Lizzy. As I move closer to the car door, I can look in and see that there is a car seat set up.

"Mr. Crosby was very specific that you needed a car seat ma'am. Do you need help with Lizzy?"

I shake my head because I can't talk. I probably shouldn't be surprised that Sid thought of everything but he keeps surprising me. There is even a TV showing an episode of Dora and a Starbucks coffee for me. After settling Lizzy in her car seat, I lean back and drink my coffee. Lizzy giggles as Backpack starts dancing which causes me to laugh too. Before we know it, we arrive at Consol.

The driver takes us through a gate and to what looks like a loading dock. Someone opens the door when we've stopped.

"Hello Cat. Hi Lizzy. I'm Jennifer and I'll take you inside to Sid."

"Thank you" I reply and unbuckle Lizzy.

As we're following Jennifer, Lizzy holds my hand tight. She doesn't often get shy but this is an unfamiliar place and with unfamiliar people. This feels odd even to me. The last two times we were at Consol, we walked through the front doors. We follow a long hall and through a series of halls until we start to see Penguins posters.

"Sidwee!" Lizzy shouts and points to a poster of Sid.

"Yes sweetheart, it's Sidney" I tell her.

Jennifer leads us into a large room that has a horrific smell. It smells like something died in here and has been rotting for years. Jennifer must notice my wrinkled nose.

"It's the equipment. I'd like to say that you get use to the smell but you really don't. You just learn to ignore it. If you'll come over here please?"

Lizzy and I follow her to one of the benches where Sid's name plate is hanging. I also notice the tiny skates. This must be Sid's surprise: he's taking Lizzy onto the ice. There's also a small Pens jersey with Sid's name and number.

"Do you want to go on the ice Lizzy?" She doesn't understand so I simply smile; she'll understand soon.

I sit her down and exchange her boots for the skates then put the jersey on over her jacket. When she stands up, she's a little wobbly on her first couple of steps until she gets the hang of it. When she's steadier, she grins up at me. I take her hand and look at Jennifer.

"Ok Lizzy, Cat, follow me."

Jennifer leads us out the door and down a hall. It takes us more time than it usually would as Lizzy wobbles on her skates but she won't be carried. We come out of a tunnel, we're at ice level, and walk to the edge.

"Sidwee, Sidwee, Sidwee!" Lizzy cries out when she sees him on the ice.

Sid glances over at us and a huge grin breaks out over his face. He has taken off his helmet and all of his gear above the waist.

"Hello princess!" He greets Lizzy and bends down to kiss her puckered lips as we get to the ice surface. When he straightens, he smiles at me too so I pucker my lips as Lizzy did. Sid's smile widens and he leans in to peck my lips too.

"Hi" he says.

"Hi" I reply. "This is some surprise."

"You said that Lizzy had never skated so I thought we could have her first time here. We'll get you on the ice next time" he says with a wink. He looks at Lizzy now and asks "do you want to skate princess?"

"Sidwee, Sidwee!" She says to him and holds out her hands.

"We need to get you ready first" he tells her and then he grabs a small helmet for her from the bench. After it's fastened, Lizzy tries to walk onto the ice.

"Wait one moment Lizzy" he tells her and grabs something from the behind the boards. It's a metal thing that he puts on the ice in front of her. "Ok princess, hang on here" he puts her hands on the metal and I see what it is now. It's like a walker that the elderly use only it's small enough for Lizzy and made for the ice.

"Put one foot on the ice" he tells her and she does. "Now the other foot."

Lizzy looks up at Sid a little wary but follows his directions. When she's standing on the ice, she grins up at him and then looks back at me.

"Mommy, I'm skating!"

"Yes sweetheart, you're skating."

"Ok Lizzy, let's go" Sid says as he pulls the walker a little further into the ice. He gives her guidance as she tries to skate. First she walks on the ice so he shows her how to glide. That takes a little while to figure out. She has no fear though; she's willing to try anything that Sid tells her to but she keeps walking. The gliding idea doesn't really break through and, even when Sid demonstrates, she doesn't get it. Of course she's only been walking for a few years and now we're trying to add a whole new movement. It's interesting that neither Lizzy nor I are scared or concerned. I guess we both have that much faith in Sid.

She falls a couple of times but doesn't hurt herself since she's in snow pants and well padded. It's more like she slides to the ice than falls hard. Anyway, she is having so much fun. A few times she even has to stop what she's doing because she's giggling so much. Of course her giggles start Sid giggling. I love watching them together and the giggle-fest that usually ensues.

Sid gives up on the 'walker' and gets behind Lizzy to prop her up and basically pushes her forward. They make it the width of the ice and then half way back to the centre. Lizzy almost falls again but Sid has her firmly.

I can tell that she's getting tired and I'm about to tell Sid when he picks her up in his arms. He starts skating around the ice, looping in a large circle, and starts to pick up speed. The faster Sid goes, the more Lizzy giggles. It's so cute. I feel some trepidation as he continues to go even faster but then I remind myself that he's the best hockey player in the world. He knows what he's doing.

When they come back to the bench, Lizzy's cheeks are pink and she's still giggling.

"Mommy, did you see me? I skating."

"Yes baby, you were skating." I take Lizzy from Sid and we all walk back to the locker. Now that Sid is so close, I can tell that he smells just like that locker room.

"Yeah" he says. "This gear reeks."

He must have seen my wrinkled nose.

"You must take the longest showers to get clean and fresh" I say and we both chuckle thinking about our last two showers together.

As we enter the locker room, I look around and it's still empty. Sid must notice.

"It was an optional skate today and most guys worked out earlier. They're all gone."

I smile at Sid, he smiles back and then bends down to help Lizzy off with her helmet and skates. I'm left wondering again about Sid not wanting his team mates to meet me or us.

When Lizzy's ready, Sid says "I need to jump in the shower but I'll be quick and then we can have lunch, ok?"

"Sounds great; although there's no need to skimp on the shower."

"Ha ha ha. Ok, I'll show you where you can wait" Sid says and shows us to what he calls the players' lounge. We get comfortable while Sid leaves to shower and change.

"Cat?" I hear behind me. When I look, it's one of the guys who have come into the diner with Sid.

"Yes, I'm Cat" I reply.

"Nice to see you again. I'm Pascal. You must be Lizzy" he says turning to her. "I have a little girl who is your age. Her name is Lola. Would you like some juice?" He asks her and glances at me. I nod so he looks back at her.

"Yes" Lizzy says to him.

"Yes what?" I say to her.

She frowns for a moment then says "yes please" to Pascal.

"You have very good manners" Pascal tells her and turns to get her juice. When he's back and hands it to her, Lizzy glances at me then says "thank you" to Pascal.

"You're very welcome" he replies. "Don't worry" he continues looking at me. "Most of the guys are gone or in the showers."

Two things come to mind when Pascal says this to me. First, that Pascal knows that Sid doesn't want anyone to know about us. Second, Sid has told Pascal that we're dating. I don't know what to think now. Maybe I'm just thinking too much and should just go with it more.

Pascal says goodbye and Lizzy and I are alone again but not for long.

"Are my girls ready for lunch?" I hear Sid ask behind us.

We both turn around to look at him.

"Sidwee!" Lizzy calls out as she runs to him. Sid catches her in flight and holds her in his arms.

"Are you ready for lunch princess?" He asks her.

"Hungie" Lizzy answers him.

"And how about mommy? Are you hungry too?" Sid asks me.

Looking at Sid with still damp hair, a tight fitting long sleeve tee shirt and jeans makes me realize that I'm hungry for much more than lunch. I can tell that Sid sees my thoughts as his eyes narrow slightly and darken.

"Starving" I tell him.

We all put our coats on and Sid leads the way to the parking garage. We walk to a car that isn't his truck. Sid notices my confusion.

"I traded cars with Pascal" he explains. "He has a car seat and his daughter is about Lizzy's age."

I watch as Sid opens the back door and puts Lizzy in the car seat. I hadn't thought about the car seat for Lizzy either to Consol or leaving since we never drive. I'm so glad that Sid did.

The drive is short and I recognize the way to Sid's condo. Lizzy has been singing and talking non-stop. She stops when we enter Sid's apartment where she walks directly to the wall of windows.

"Like mother like daughter" Sid says as he puts his arm around me.

We both watch Lizzy put her hands on the window and her nose up against the glass.

I chuckle and say "good luck explaining that to your cleaning people."

"How do you know that I don't clean the place myself?" He asks.

I simply look up at him and arch an eyebrow.

"I love it when you do that" he lowers his voice. "It's sexy as hell" then he dips down to kiss me.

I forget everything except Sid until Lizzy bangs into us and yells "me, me, me!"

I look down and her arms are around Sid's legs and her lips are puckered. Sid chuckles, releases me and picks Lizzy up to peck her lips. Lizzy grins and cuddles into Sid's arms laying her head on his shoulder. I look at them and can't help wondering if Lizzy is missing out by not having a dad. I watch how easily she shows affection with Sid and wonder if it's because she's craving male attention. Maybe I am too. Then I see Sid nuzzle her neck which makes Lizzy laugh. It may be true that we crave male attention but our attraction isn't because Sid's a man; it's because he's Sid.

"What?" Sid asks and I see both he and Lizzy are staring at me.

"Sorry. My mind wandered. What's for lunch?"

"We're having Lizzy for lunch" Sid says and pretends to nip at her neck. Lizzy giggles and tries to wiggle out of Sid's arms. They both end up giggling again. Sid sounds as young as Lizzy when he giggles. I like this silly side of him.

When the silliness ends, we all head into the kitchen and put lunch together. Sid has chicken again but this time with squash and carrots; Whole Foods does really well with Sid I can tell. Lunch is a lot of fun. We have a brief moment of figuring out how to get Lizzie at the table so that she can reach; but, we move lunch into the living room and eat at the coffee table. We can all sit on floor. I'm thankful that Sid has hardwood so it's easily cleaned up. Lizzy is still working on tidiness.

We relive Lizzy's first time on the ice during lunch. She wants to be a hockey player when she 'gets big' just like Sid. It's so cute. She clearly has a huge crush on him with a bit of hero worship too.

After lunch is cleaned up, Sid surprises us both by bringing out a huge bag of Megablocks and we spread them out over the living room floor. We build towers and knock them down. There is lots of more giggling. When Lizzy and I team up to build a large tower, Sid knocks it down this time. Lizzy and I look at each other.

"I bet Sid's ticklish. What do you think Lizzy?"

She just giggles and then we pounce on Sid. Soon the three of us are rolling on the floor and we discover that Sid is indeed ticklish. After our tickle fight, we clean up the blocks and settle on Sid's sofa to watch a movie. It's one of Lizzy's favourites; Brave. Unfortunately, my very tired girl falls asleep shortly after the movie begins. She's curled up on Sid's lap.

"She's out" I tell Sid. "You can put her down if you want."

"No, she's ok here" he tells me. "What?"

"I don't know. It's been odd, not in a bad way, just odd to watch her with you."

"What do you mean?"

I don't know if I can adequately explain myself.

"Sid, Lizzy has had men in her life; at the diner and the Centre. She's never had one that she was close to, that she cared about. It's odd but really, really nice."

"And who cares about her too. I want you to know that Cat. What we have is new and undefined but I want you to know that I care about you both."

"Good because we both care about you too."

Sid smiles but his expression quickly becomes pensive.

"What?" I ask him.

"Can I ask you a question?"

I almost tell him that he just did but I can see that he's serious.

"Ok. What would you like to know?"

"I want to know about your life Cat. You said that your mom was a drug addict and you went into foster care. What was that like?"

"Sid, I don't talk about it because it's over. I'm not that person anymore."

"I get it, and I will let it go if you really want me to; but, it made you who you are today. You hear stories of, well, abuse and stuff in foster care. I guess, I don't know" and he trails off on a shrug.

He looks away now and I finally get it. He's worried.

"Sid, it was difficult. It was a nightmare. But there wasn't any abuse: emotional cruelty from my mother and often indifference by foster families but never abuse."

He looks pensive still but also relieved. I didn't realize that he was worried about this or else I wouldn't have shut him down so completely when he brought it up before.

"Sid, really, I got through it and now I'm here. How can I be regretful of anything when I look at her?"

We both look at Lizzy sleeping soundly. When we're looking at each other again, Sid reaches up and cups my face. It's so tender, so kind and so loving that it takes my breath away for a moment.

"I just want to get to know you better Cat. My purpose isn't to pry. Everything we are is where we come from and what we've made of ourselves. We all use our history, our experiences and the people in our lives to us who we are now."

I'm not sure I like where he's going with this; if I look back on my life and where I came from, who I came from, then I'm not much of everything. I lean back against the sofa and look at Lizzy still sleeping in Sid's arms. What if where I come, what I come from, affects her?

"Where have you gone Cat? You seem a million miles away."

How do I answer that question? The more I learn about Sid, I see that he had a pretty normal life growing up until he hit about ten, eleven years old when he was recognized as a phenom. His parents worked hard to keep him in hockey. They were a normal family. That's made him a great guy and as normal as he is extraordinary.

"Sid, I don't know what to say. I guess our pasts do make us who we are after all."

"I hope you know what I mean Cat. Sometimes, when you have a rough childhood, you use it to make your life better. That's what you've done Cat."

Oh, that's what he means. Oh.

"You're incredible Cat; truly incredible."

"Sid, that's really sweet. I don't know what to say."

"Don't say anything. I only wanted to explain why I want to know everything about you. I want to everything about every part of you. The more I learn, the more I want to know Cat."

Ok, now this guy seems too good to be true but I'm going to do what I said; I'm going to stop thinking and go with it.

"I want to know about you too Sid. One of the things I've learned is that you are incredible. Lizzy will always remember today and her first skate with her 'Sidwee.' This is a wonderful memory for all of us. Sid, she was so happy today. I love to watch you together."

"She did have a great time huh?"

"Yeah she did. These Megablocks were a great idea too. She loves building things and putting things together."

"I didn't think that she would want to play video games and Duper's kids love Lego. When I went to buy Lego, they were too old for her so the guy at the store told me that these things are Legos for younger kids."

"Well she loves them. I'll have to get some for her now."

"Take these ones and I'll get more. I'm hoping that you'll both be spending some time here too."

Wow, now I'm feeling a little overwhelmed. This is going fast. We hadn't been going out very long when we slept together and now Lizzy's heart is involved. I intended to avoid both of those things but here we are.

"Sid, things are moving really fast" I tell him.

He looks down and then back at me. "Too fast? Do you want to slow down?"

I think about that for a moment then reply "no."

Sid smiles, opens up his free arm and I slide in beside him. Cuddled in his arms with my daughter makes me dream a little of what could be. This is what it must be like to have a partner and not be alone. Lizzy and I are a family, we don't need anyone else to make us a family; but, having someone else to count on, to lean on, feels good.

Am I getting ahead of myself? Yeah, I guess I am. It feels good though to trust someone enough to let them in. I may still have reservations letting Sid and Lizzy get this close this soon; however, Lizzy has never been happier and I've definitely never been happier or more satisfied. Maybe this will work out.


	14. Chapter 14

The day I spent with Lizzy and Cat on our 'date' was incredible. As I anticipated, teaching Lizzy to skate was a lot of fun and that kid is fearless. We'll have to do it again soon. I can still see her smiles and hear her giggles. Lunch at my place was fun too. The talk with Cat helped allay some of my fears. I started thinking about her past and the things you hear and read about the foster system and it worried me. That was compounded when Cat kept evading any discussion of her past. At least she confirmed that she wasn't physically or sexually abused; but, that conversation has only brought up more questions. Who is Lizzy's father and why isn't he helping at least financially? What about Cat's father? She talked about her mother but not her own father. I wanted to ask everything all at once but could clearly see the new stop signs on Cat's face. It wasn't the time to ask more questions. I'd have to wait.

The next two weeks went by quickly. We played a lot of games at home and away and I spent all of my free time with Cat and Lizzy. We built cities with the Megablocks, went to the park and played in the snow and I even got Lizzy back on the ice twice. I had to buy a car seat. Thankfully Duper picked it up for me and installed it too. I have no idea what to do with a toddler or what one needs. I'm glad that I confided in him. The back windows of the truck are tinted so no one can see that there's a car seat in there. We've had so much fun together. It's also been incredibly frustrating. Cat and I haven't found any time together alone. We've had incredible, full on make out sessions but haven't managed more. Our schedules haven't matched up when Lizzy's asleep to repeat our shower fun. At this point, I'd take her any way I could get her but we haven't managed it yet.

"Lizzy seems to be enjoying learning to skate" I hear Duper say beside me.

I turn to him and reply "yeah she is. Thanks for helping me install the car seat. I never would have thought of that myself."

"You're welcome. You don't have kids; why would you think of it? I'm glad Lizzy is enjoying herself. You may have a problem though."

Confused, I ask "what do you mean?"

"I think that Rossi was still around when you had Cat and Lizzy here yesterday. He's unpredictable so he may or may not say anything. If he's smart, he knows he'll be castrated for publishing anything like this but he's not always smart."

Fuck! Rossi is an unknown quantity and can be an ass. If he knows that I'm seeing someone, especially someone with a child, then he can get a lot of exposure and sell a lot of papers. He has to know that Mario would crucify him and whatever was left would be killed by Pat. My agent may be all smiles in public but he is lethal in private.

"Sid?" Duper says.

"Yeah, sorry. We can't prevent Rossi from doing whatever he's going to do. We'll just wait and see I guess. Should I tell Cat?"

"What would you tell her?" Duper asks.

"Good question. Yeah, I guess we'll just wait and see what happens. He couldn't be that much of an ass, could he?"

I look at Duper who simply arches an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I know Duper, he is that much of an ass."

He chuckles and we both finish getting dressed. I can't control the media and especially Rossi. It's going to get out eventually. I don't want to think about it now. Today, I'm taking Cat and Lizzy to the zoo. I've arranged for us to have a private tour of penguin exhibit. Lizzy has been talking about it for days. She's so excited to meet the 'penguns' that she asks me every day if we're going that day. We're counting them down together and today is finally the day. It's cold out but sunny; perfect.

"Sid, are you ready?" I hear Sam call from the change room door.

"Ready for what Sam?" I ask him.

"Mario is waiting with the UPMC and Consol guys. There are a few other big corporate sponsors too. You're having the meet and greet."

Fuck! I forgot about the sponsor thing. That means I'm going to be late for the zoo. Looking at my watch, I do some quick calculations and I should only be an hour late, two at the most. We'll still be able to have a great time at the zoo.

"Ok, let me send a quick message" I tell him and Sam looks at his watch. We must be running late already. "Ok, I'll text on the way" I tell him and Sam looks relieved.

I follow him down the hall and to the elevator. Once inside, I send Cat a message.

'Forgot about a sponsor thing. Will be an hour or two late. Sorry.'

It takes a moment but then she texts back 'ok, we'll see you soon'

I put the phone on silent and then in my pocket.

The room is elaborately set up for a luncheon. Double fuck! It's lunch too. I reach for my phone when I hear "there he is!" Mario approaches me with two men. I can tell that I'm late and he's not happy. Ok, time to put on the shine and charm my way out of this and make everyone happy again. With that as my focus, I put everything else out of my mind.

* * *

One hour went by quickly. Since Lizzy can't tell time, she didn't realize that Sid was late. Of course I kept her busy making a card for Sid to thank him for taking us to the zoo. The thirty minutes after that were a little dicey with some wining and lots of questions. I haven't heard from Sid again after I sent a few texts and two calls. After ninety minutes, the wining became acting out and periodic crying. I tried to feed her because dinner time came and went; still no Sid.

I finally lied to her and said that Sid was very sorry he couldn't make it but he'll take us another day. That started the mother of all tantrums complete with throwing toys, kicking and screaming and tears, lots of tears. It broke my heart to watch her disappointment and despair. Dinner didn't happen, she wouldn't eat, and I skipped the bath to put Lizzy directly to bed a full hour earlier than her bedtime. The emotional unrest of the afternoon exhausted her and she fell right to sleep.

Back in the living room, I dropped to the sofa and closed my eyes for a moment. Now that Lizzy's asleep, I start worrying about Sid; this isn't like him to not text or call at all. He could be hurt. What if he was in a car accident or maybe he went back on the ice during the sponsor thing and got hurt? I check my phone and there's still nothing. I don't know who to even contact to see if there was an accident. I call his number again and it rings and rings before going to voice mail.

The front door buzzes and I run to it.

"Sid?" I ask.

"Yeah, it's me. Let me in?"

I buzz him in, open my front door and wait. It seems to take forever for the elevator to 'ding' and Sid to walk out. He's barely made it a few feet when I run to him and jump into his arms. We simply hold each other for a moment.

"You're ok" I whisper.

Sid chuckles and says "yeah I'm ok."

I lean back now look at him. He's fine and looks apologetic with a small smile on his face too. He looks like he's just a few minutes late rather than the four that devastated a three year old. I'm about to scream when I remember that we're in the hall so I turn and walk back to the apartment. Sid follows me in and, after the door has closed, I turn.

"Where have you been? Why didn't you return any of my texts or calls?"

Sid takes out his phone and then looks at me, sheepishly.

"I'm sorry Cat. I forgot to take it off silent. I'm so sorry for bailing this afternoon. I forgot about this sponsor thing and then found out it was a luncheon after I got there. When I finished, I thought that I'd come right here and make it up to you in person so I didn't look at my phone."

Sid has that apologetic look on his face with a small smile again. He tries to pull me to him for a kiss. I push away and back up a few feet scared that I might just punch that smile off of his face.

"What's up? I'm really sorry Cat. Honest. I'll make it up to you" he says.

"And Lizzy" I say.

"Lizzy too, of course."

"You have no idea what you've done, do you? I managed to keep Lizzy busy for what was supposed to be an hour. The next hour had her asking me where her 'Sidwee' was to take her to see the 'penguns.' The next hour was the tantrum; crying, screaming, throwing things around. Finally, the tantrum ended with her sobbing in my arms for her 'Sidwee' and eventually I was able to put her to bed, exhausted and heart broken."

"I'm so sorry Cat. I'll take her to zoo tomorrow."

He doesn't get it.

"Sid, it isn't about the zoo. You could watch cartoons with her all day. She doesn't want things; she wants you. You have to understand that Sid. She was heartbroken today. In the past two weeks we've had to reschedule or you've been late but not like this; not for something this big that you hyped a lot for her."

"I am so sorry. It's part of my life that stuff comes up for hockey and it always will. I need the people in my life to be flexible to that because it's going to happen."

He really, really doesn't get it.

"Sid, she's a three year old little girl. She doesn't understand being flexible. All she knows is that you said that you were coming and you didn't."

"And I'm sorry. What else do you want me to say?"

"Why didn't you call or at least send a text? Take one minute to call and tell her yourself that you're sorry and will make it up to her. She would still be upset but talking to you would help. She wouldn't have been so confused or felt deserted. I was worried, really worried that you were hurt or something horrible happened. I didn't know who to call to see if you were ok!"

I guess I'm angry about more than the effect on Lizzy.

"There was nothing wrong Cat."

"I didn't know that Sid and because we're still you're dirty little secret, I didn't even know how to find out if you were still alive!"

"Are we back to that again? I thought you understood why I didn't want anyone to know. I thought you got it. My life is complicated; you need to get that."

Suddenly I'm scared; very scared that I've made a huge mistake. Maybe we've just been playing house and I've been pretending that we can have a life together. Lizzy loves Sidney so much and now she's hurt. My instincts have been warring ever since I met Sid; I wanted to keep Lizzy and Sid separate until I was sure this would work but fate kept pushing us all together. I thought when he made sure there were car seats and had a little helmet for Lizzy that he understood children.

"Sid, I am getting that your life is complicated. I get that this is a compressed season because of the lock out. I get that you need to put all of your efforts into hockey and everything else comes second. It's because I get it that this is over."

The words leave my mouth before they've gone fully through my brain. When my heart argues, my brain remembers Lizzy's crying face and her broken heart. I turn away from Sid so that he can't see my eyes filling with tears and regret.

"If that's what you want Cat" Sid says softly and then a moment later I hear the click of the door.

I turn at the sound and find Sid is gone. How did we get here?

* * *

How did we get here? As I drive away, that keeps rolling over and over in my head. Just how did we get here?

Hockey has to come first. Cat gets that, doesn't she? How can she not? This is my first full season healthy in two years. I need to focus on hockey and winning. Geno's healthy, I'm healthy and the team is clicking. We are going to win the Cup this year. I can feel it.

Lizzy. Cat said that her heart was broken. That she was sobbing for me. I know she's incredibly excited when she sees me and I am for her; but, surely Cat was exaggerating about how upset Lizzy was when I didn't show up. The guys with kids deal with this all the time and Lizzy isn't even my kid. Cat was over reacting. Besides, hockey has always come first. You can't be at the top of the game without sacrifices. I've managed to avoid relationships during the season so that I don't have to worry about anything but hockey. How does Duper or Flower do it? They have kids. Fuck, Lizzy isn't even my kid.

Ok, I need to think of something else or I'm going to really go crazy. I need to work out so I go back to Consol. My pass lets me in but I stop at security so that they know I'm here.

"Hey Sid. What are you doing back?"

"Hi Tom. I decided to work out after all."

"You work too hard Sid."

That's not the first time I've heard that so I simply chuckle and head to the locker room. I change into my gear and turn on the lights as I go to the gym. I hate running but it usually works when I'm pissed off. I start steady but quickly increase speed and incline. It feels good; the steady thump of my feet on the tread, the sweat rolling down my back, the push and pull of my muscles. I blank my mind and focus solely on those things.

I'm surprised when I see that I've been running for forty five minutes. First I slow down and then I stop. I don't feel any more frustration or anger. Now I'm simply tired and, well, sad. The only thing I'm absolutely sure of is that I need to make this right with Lizzy. If she is that upset then I need to see her and make sure that she's ok even if Cat and I are broken up.

Maybe I'll stop by when Cat's at work so it's less painful on us both. That thought gets me through the night and the next day's practice. Now that I'm at the door ready to ring the buzzer, I doubt that this really is a good idea. What am I going to say to Lizzy about why we won't see each other anymore? What am I going to say?

I must walk back and forth a dozen times in front of the door. Before I can talk myself out of it, I press the button.

"Hello?" Fuck! It's Cat. She's supposed to be working.

"Hi Cat. I thought you were working. I can come back."

"Why are you here Sid?"

This is way more complicated than I wanted it to be and it was already complicated.

"I thought about what you said and I want to see Lizzy. I don't want to leave it like that for her."

There's silence for the longest time. I'm about to walk away when I hear the buzz to open the door.

I feel the butterflies in my stomach intensify the closer I get to her door. It takes a couple of deep breaths before I can knock on her door. Cat answers quickly and I take her in with greedy eyes.

Her hair is in a ponytail and she's not wearing makeup. There are dark circles under her eyes and her lips are pursed.

"Hi" I say.

"Hi" she replies. "What are you going to say?" She asks in a low voice.

I really don't know. I haven't thought that far ahead. She can see my thoughts on my face.

"Sid, really, you can't just arrive and not know what you're going to say to her."

I know she's right. I'm going to make this worse if I'm not careful.

"What should I say?" I ask her.

She sighs. "Tell her that you are going to be traveling a lot and may not see her for a while. I'll handle it from there in a few weeks."

With that, Cat backs up and lets me come in. I take off my shoes and coat.

"Lizzy" Cat calls for her daughter.

When Lizzy comes around the corner, I know the moment that she sees me.

"Sidwee!" she screams and runs to me at full speed.

I pick her out of the air and hug her to me. Her small arms wrap around my neck and cling. I take a deep breath and breathe in talc and crayons. The break up with Cat has been killing me; but, the break up with the little girl in my arms may just destroy me.

I walk us over to the sofa and sit down with Lizzy still in my arms.

"Goin' to zoo?" She asks.

"No sweetie, not today."

I watch her smile turn into a pout quickly and she buries her face in my neck.

"Zoooooo" she says into my neck and the sound squeezes my heart.

"I know princess. I'm sorry" is all I can say.

Lizzy leans back and takes my cheeks in her hands so that I'm looking into her tear filled eyes; my heart is squeezed even tighter.

"Sidwee" she says in a very small voice.

It is like she knows that something is wrong. She may be picking up on Cat's mood or mine but she knows. I take a deep breath and decide to rip off the proverbial band aid.

"Lizzy, I'm going to be traveling a lot and you may not see me for a while. It could be a long time" I tell her.

I can see her struggling to understand what I'm saying. God, this is harder than I ever could have imagined.

"Lizzy, I'm going to say goodbye today and you won't see me for a long time."

She understands, finally.

"Why?" Is all she says.

Shit.

"I have to go away to work" I continue the lie.

"Why?" She says again.

Fuck.

"It's my job Lizzy."

She squeezes my cheeks now and simply says "no."

Those eyes are a replica of her mother's. When I look at Cat, she has the same disappointed look as Lizzy. Only her eyes are disappointed in me. I really thought that she understood that hockey sometimes messes up plans. It always will. I look back at Lizzie and it hits me; this is why Cat didn't want us to include Lizzy in our relationship initially. She wanted us to see if we work before bringing in this tiny heart.

Lizzy lays her head on my shoulder and sniffles. Cat is still standing there hugging herself. She's every bit as strong and beautiful as the moment I met her and every moment since. She's quick witted and funny. She's sweet and kind and sexy as hell. I'm left wondering, again, how did we get here? I could easily say that it was just this once and I can make it up to both of them but that wouldn't be true. Hockey will always interfere with life plans. If this isn't something that Cat can deal with than this definitely won't work. I will constantly disappoint her and Lizzy.

I stand with Lizzy still in my arms. She wraps her arms and legs around me tight and I feel the squeeze all the way to my heart again.

"Ok Lizzy, I have to go" I tell her. I almost call her 'princess' but it hurts too much to say.

"No!"

"Lizzy, Sid has to leave now" Cat says.

"No!"

I look at Cat who is staring at me. Crouching down, I place Lizzy on her feet and pry her arms from around my neck.

"I have to go Lizzy. You be a good girl for you mommy, ok?"

A tear spills out over her cheek. I peck quickly at her lips and leave. The last image I have is of Lizzy standing in front of Cat with her hands on Lizzy's shoulders. The both look very sad expressing exactly how I feel.

I don't really remember leaving or driving away. I really want to have a dozen drinks or so but I don't. In a shortened season I can't afford to have a hangover. I find myself in front of Duper's house and text him to make sure that I'm not interrupting anything. He invites me in.

Duper lets me in and says "give me a minute. I need to put Kody down. Head into the living room and I'll meet you there in a few minutes."

I nod and head in to wait for him. There's a game on so I settle down to watch. Duper doesn't make me wait long. He gives me a glass of red wine and sits beside me.

"Ok, what's going on?" He asks me.

I take a deep breath and it all spills out; how happy I've been with Cat and Lizzy, the fun we've had the three of us and also just Cat and I alone. It's very unlike me but I even tell him how incredible the sex was.

"This is why I don't date during the season. It just doesn't work Dupe."

"You're full of shit Sid."

This definitely takes me by surprise.

"What the fuck" I say back.

"You heard me. You're full of shit."

"Ok" is all I can say.

"She has a child. You knew that going in and you knew that kids make things complicated. I have four and you see the struggle it is for us."

"That's just it Dupe. You make it work with four. You can't be at everything or hold up to all of your promises. It's part of being a hockey player."

"My schedule isn't like yours of course but I don't miss the commitments I make. I'm really careful about the ones I do make and then I work at them coming true. Remember last week when we were in Boston? Kody had that big recital and I couldn't be there. Do you remember what I did?"

I think back and can't remember. "No, I don't" I reply.

"We were able to time it so that I heard him play over the phone and then I talked to him."

I think about it. The Dupuis' make everything look so effortless that I've never thought about the effort it takes.

"So what should I have done about the zoo Dupe?"

"First, get your schedule right dude to prevent this kind of thing. If something does happen, you need to call and talk to the kid yourself. She's a baby Sid. Three years old is really just a baby emotionally."

I think about what he said and that's what Cat was trying to get me to understand. She was explaining the challenges of a three year old. It's not all fun and the zoo. Shit, I also never thought about what I put her through by simply not showing up. Then she had to take care of Lizzy too.

"I'm an ass Duper."

"Yeah, but we like you anyway."

I chuckle. "How am I going to fix this Duper? I really want to spend more time with Cat. There's still so much that I don't know about her."

"Don't just jump back in Sid. Make sure that you know what you're getting into."

Fuck. "Yeah, ok."

What do I do now?


	15. Chapter 15

For the next week, Lizzy asked about Sid every day. How can I possibly heal my own heart when my daughter's is just as broken? My days are busy of course. One of the other girls is sick so I have been working a few doubles and Lizzy has been very needy. I barely have a moment to myself. Of course I'm not that upset because when I'm busy then I can't think or focus on what I've lost. At night, my body betrays me and I dream of Sidney. Sometimes it's of the three of us playing in the snow or watching cartoons. Most often it's of incredible nights with Sid doing things to me that has me waking with my body aching for his. I could swear that I still feel his touch on my bare skin. Of course they are only dreams and nothing has changed.

Thankfully, tonight is a slow one and we may even close early. The snow outside is piling up quickly and most people are smart and stay at home. To stay busy, we've done a thorough clean of the diner from top to bottom and back to front. Every surface has been scrubbed and shines. There's a great deal of satisfaction in the work and hopefully I'll be tired enough to simply fall asleep quickly tonight.

"Cat, let's close up. No one is coming out in this weather. Give me a few to close down the kitchen and then I'll drive you home."

"Tessa, I live the opposite way of you. It'll be a long ride but the bus will drop me off right in front of my apartment building. Let me help you close things up and then we can both leave" I call back to her.

"I can drive you home" I hear from the front door.

I turn and see Sid standing there. I didn't even hear him come in. We simply stare at each other, neither of us moving, our eyes greedily taking in the other.

"Why don't you head out now Cat? It won't take me long to finish up here. Hi Sid" Tessa says.

Without taking his eyes off of me, Sid calls out "Hi Tessa."

I literally can't move right now. Sid is standing there wearing jeans, winter coat and baseball hat. The snow that covered him from the car to the diner is quickly melting. He looks sad and gorgeous. What do I do?

"Please Cat" he whispers just loud enough for me to hear.

There starts the war between my head and my heart again. The pleading in Sid's eyes makes up my mind; I'll go with him and hear what he has to say. That's all I'll commit to right now.

I nod to him and then go back to the kitchen to get my things.

"Maybe he wants to make up" Tessa says to me.

"I don't know Tess. Nothing has changed" I reply.

"Cat, just listen to what he has to say. At the very least, you'll get a drive home."

Leave it to Tessa to find a practical side of an emotional situation. It makes me chuckle.

While putting on my coat, I head back into the dining room and Sid gives me a small, shy smile. I nod and head out the door in front of him. Sid's truck is already covered in snow. The lights flash as he unlocks the doors.

"Get in and I'll clear off the snow" he tells me.

I follow his directions and climb into the passenger side. The smell of Sid's cologne hits me first. He must have just had a shower before he came here. Shortly, Sid climbs in, starts the truck then pulls slowly onto the road. There are very few cars out and the roads are covered in deep snow. Sid drives very slowly but still skids a few times. There must be ice under the snow. He turns onto a side street and the car continues to turn even after he tries to straighten. Sid fights the skid but we still slide across the four lanes until we stop facing the wrong way on the other side of the street.

"Are you ok?" Sid asks me when we've stopped.

"Yeah" I reply.

He starts the car again and tries to go forward. The wheels only spin. Sid must be used to winter weather because he expertly rocks the truck a few times to get us free of the ditch. He continues slowly down the street for a few more moments.

"Are you sure you're ok?" he asks.

"Yeah, I'm fine Sid, really."

We continue in silence again. Sid tries to stop at an intersection but the wheels lock and we slide right through it narrowly missing another vehicle.

When Sid has control of the truck again, he says "fuck this" and turns away from the route to my apartment.

"Where are we going? What are you doing Sid?"

"It is way too dangerous out here. I'm a few minutes away so I'm going to my place."

I feel a panic start from my toes and spread throughout my entire body. I wasn't sure I wanted Sid to drive me home; I sure as shit don't want to go to his place.

"Sid, really, just drop me at the bus stop. They drive through anything and will let me off in front of my apartment." I know that I sound panicked but I can't help it.

"I'm not leaving you at the side of the road in this weather Cat."

That's all he says as he continues to drive to his place. We do arrive relatively quickly. When we get up to Sid's apartment, we take off all of our wet clothes and Sid turns on his gas fireplace.

"I'm going to make some hot chocolate and soup. Would you like something?" Sid asks me.

I want to say no. I want to say that I won't be here long enough. I say "both would be great. Thank you."

I know that I'm not leaving with the weather like it is and my stomach is telling me how hungry I am.

When Sid goes into the kitchen, I call Miss Sally.

"Hello?"

"Hi Miss Sally."

"Cat, where are you girl? It looks horrible out there."

"Yeah, it is. Actually, Sid came to the diner and we were driving home. The roads are treacherous so we went to his place. I'm definitely not going to make it home."

"Can't say as I'm upset that you're with Sid."

"Yeah, I thought you would say that. Can I talk to Lizzy?"

The phone is silent for a few moments then "Mommy?"

"Hi baby. Are you having fun with Miss Sally?"

"Played tea party."

"I bet it was a great tea party. Sweetie, I won't be home tonight. The snow is falling hard so I'm staying with a friend. I'll see you in the morning."

"Pancakes?"

She's already learned how to bargain. "Yes, I'll make pancakes when I get home."

"Yay!"

"I have to go. Good night baby. Love you."

"Bye mommy."

"Cat, you still there?" Miss Sally asks.

"Yep, I'm still here. Thanks again."

"Of course missy. Enjoy yourself."

She hangs up before I can correct her. There is no fun for this evening.

"Soups on" Sid calls from the dining room.

I head in and see that he's set the table with soup, hot chocolate and bread.

"Looks good" I tell him.

We both stand there in an awkward silence. Sid gestures to a chair so I sit. We each eat and there's more awkward silence. I'm almost halfway through my soup when Sid is the first to break to talk.

"So, um, I guess I should explain why I was at the diner" he begins. "How is Lizzy?"

That's not what I expected.

"She's good. Still doing everything at a million miles an hour. She's discovered that if she runs fast in the apartment then she can slide on the floor" I answer.

We both laugh but then we're back to awkward silence.

"Anyway" Sid starts again. "I owe you an apology Cat. I, um, I didn't realize how it would affect Lizzy that way. I would have done things differently if I'd realized."

An apology is unexpected. I don't know what to say.

"Ok" is all I manage.

I notice that we're both finished our soup so I pick up a few dishes and head into the kitchen. I hear Sid doing the same.

After rinsing the dishes in my hands, I put them on the counter to go back and grab the rest. When I turn, I walk directly into Sid's chest. He grabs my waist to steady me and my hands go to his chest. I look up into his eyes and all breath leaves me. It's like a punch and it's overwhelming. I try to push past Sid but he pulls me back to him and cups my cheek gently.

"Cat" he whispers.

I can't speak or move. Sid lowers his head until his lips are a breath away. His eyes darken and bore into mine. It's as if he's waiting for me to move the last inch. It doesn't take me long to decide. I sway into Sid and our lips meet. The kiss is soft and sweet. It's like remembering a beautiful moment and it materializes in front of you.

We part and Sid holds an inch away from my lips. Again he seems to be waiting for me to decide if this is what I want. Nothing has changed between us. We still have lives that aren't compatible. Sid wants to come and go as he wants but I have a three year old who doesn't understand and who's heart breaks a little every time. But right now all that seems to be in question is what I want and what I want, crave, more than anything is Sidney. I grab his shoulders and pull him to me. The instant our lips touch, we abandon all sweetness.

Sid pulls me closer and then up so that I can wrap my legs around his waist. He backs me until I'm sitting on the counter and Sid is pressed against me between my legs. We take greedy gulps of each other's lips and I feel Sid's hands slide up under my sweater. My fingers are digging into his shoulders trying to pull him even closer to me. Our tongues dual and I hear Sid groan deep. It spurs me on and I moan loud and long when Sid presses himself further between my legs.

His lips leave mine, travel down my neck and to my ear. He kisses and sucks at the tender flesh there and then nips at my lobe. My nails dig into his shoulders through his tee shirt. He responds by nipping harder. I can feel myself getting wetter and wetter and I grind against him uncontrollably.

I'm desperate to feel his warm skin so I back away momentarily and pull off his tee shirt. Sid helps by raising his arms. That leaves me with a wide expanse of chest to touch and kiss and lick so I do all three. The taste of his skin is both familiar and foreign. The hard muscles flex and move under my fingers. I feel Sid pulling my sweater up so I pull back just long enough for him to pull it off and then I continue the exploration of his chest with my lips and tongue.

Sid pulls my bra straps down which captures my arms to my sides. He pushes me away slightly and kneels in front of me pulling my bra to my waist with him. My hands feast in his hair as his lips attack one nipple. While his mouth alternates between sucking, licking and nipping at one nipple, his finger and thumb play with the other. My nails dig into his scalp and urge him on. I feel his ministrations down to my core and he knows it. His mouth moves to my other breast and his free hand moves lower. He rubs me through my yoga pants and I grind against his hand. I have to hold onto the counter so that I don't simply dissolve into a puddle on the floor. Sid stands again in front of me and his eyes bore into mine while his hands slip into the waist of my pants.

"Up" he tells me hoarsely.

I do as he directs and lift my hips. He strips both the pants and panties off of me. His lips attack my neck and then travel lower. He pauses to play with each breast and a shiver races through my whole body. He keeps going lower, presses my thighs far apart so that I am completely open to him. I shiver again only this time in anticipation.

Sid takes a long, slow lick and pauses slightly to flick over and over at my click.

"Ahhhhhh" I cry out and almost slide off of the counter. Only Sid's hands on my inner thighs hold me in place.

Before I can adjust to anything, Sid dives his tongue inside of me. I cry out again as his tongue continues to dart in and out and his nose adds friction on my clit. I bang the back of my head against the cabinets but don't even feel it. The pressure is building inside of me faster and faster as Sid increases the speed of his tongue. I can't focus anymore. There is just too much feeling, too much sensation, too much everything. I've been dreaming of this since I last saw Sid that it feels like my dreams were foreplay for this very moment. My release hits me with a violence that I've never experienced before; not even with Sid. I feel sweat break out everywhere. There is a current of electricity traveling over my skin and tingling hot and cold.

I look down and see Sid wiping his face with his tee shirt. His look is still fierce and his eyes dark with desire.

I undo my bra and throw it on the floor. Sid stands and lifts me again so that I'm straddling his waist. I grasp his shoulders and Sid walks us to his bedroom. He lays me down and stands beside the bed. I watch with greedy eyes as Sid sheds his jeans and underwear. He stands naked in front of me. My eyes try to take in every inch of his hard, muscled body. Sid's eyes lock with mine and I shiver at the intensity I see there.

He shifts for a moment and grabs a condom from the bedside table then comes back to the bed. While he's doing that, I move to sit at the edge of the bed.

Sid moves back to me and stands between my legs. I take the condom from him, open the packet and pull it out. I look up at Sid and watch his eyes as I roll the condom over him slowly. His eyes narrow and he bites his bottom lip. When he's fully sheathed, I back up to the centre of the bed and Sid follows me. He kneels between my legs and pulls me up until we're chest to chest and my legs are wrapped around him.

We hold where we are for what is only minutes but feels like hours. Sid's hands are around my waist and lift me up. I reach down between us, take his shaft in my hand and guide myself over him as Sid lowers me. I sigh as he fills me completely. I wait a moment to adjust to his size and I can feel my juices sliding over him.

"Look at me" Sid hisses and only then do I realize that my eyes are closed. I open them and lock my eyes with his. Slowly, very slowly, I begin to rock against him. He slides in and out of me very shallow. It causes a great friction at my entrance and I shudder each time. I feel Sid's fingers digging into my back and ass. He pulls me up further on my next movement. He slides right out of me and attacks first one breast and then the other. My fingers dig into his hair again and I urge him on further.

When I can't take any more, I grab tufts of hair and yank his head back to attack his lips. I suck on the bottom one, nip at it then sooth with my tongue. I repeat the actions with the top lip too. Sid must reach his limit because he pulls me up and away slightly. When I'm kneeling over him, I slide down again and he easily slips inside. Now we've both hit our limit so we set a hard, fast rhythm. I notice the little things: our breath is loud and fast; the slap of our bodies coming together as I leak all over us both; Sid's groaning and my moaning over and over and over.

We are rushing to our climax hard. I can feel that every muscle in Sid's body is taut a he's barely holding it together. I shift slightly so that he grazes my clit with each thrust and my orgasm quickly washes over me.

As I cling to Sidney, I feel him let go as he cries out "fuuuuuk!"

We stay where we are for a few moments. I slowly realize that we're still wrapped around each other, Sid is still inside of me although flaccid now and I feel very, very sticky.

We pull away at the same time and neither of us are smiling as we always have after sex. Sid slides off the bed but brings me with him. In the bathroom, he strips off the condom and then walks to the shower. I'm left standing in the middle of the bathroom naked and feeling very vulnerable. What am I doing?

"Come here" Sid says and pulls me into the shower with him. I can't say that he's gentle about it. He pushes me under the hot spray but it really feels good. I tilt my head back and push my hair away from my face. The water feels really good over my body and works out some of the aches and pains.

I'm surprised when I feel Sid's hands slide over my body. He's lathered them with soap and is currently spreading that lather everywhere. He starts at my shoulders and neck. His hands slide down to my fingers and back up my arms. I shiver in anticipation as his fingers slide over my chest and then cup each breast. In unison, his thumbs flick over my nipples.

"Ah!" I cry out and he does it again and again. I back up against the wall so that I don't fall down. Sid follows me, lathers his hands up again and starts at my waist. He works his hands lower and lower. They go over my hips, then down my legs and back up again. As Sid stands, he slides his wet body against mine. When he's standing, he takes the shower head off of the wall and rinses me thoroughly. He hasn't touched between my legs yet. I've had multiple orgasms now but I'm still aching for more; much, much more.

When I'm rinsed to his satisfaction, Sid stands and slides his hands over me. He's not touching me as much as possessing me. It feels like he's branding me as his with every touch.

"Open your eyes" Sid tells me.

I'm struck by how demanding he is tonight. It's different than he's been before, I like it, but it's definitely different.

When I look at Sid, I see him lathering up his hands and I know there is only one place left to wash. Sid takes my lips in a searing kiss and continues to devour my lips while his hand slides between my legs. I moan when his fingers slip between my folds. He takes advantage and deepens the kiss while sliding two fingers inside of me. I can't keep my eyes open now because of the pleasure that Sid's clever fingers are bringing me. I'm tender after what we've already done but I don't want him to ever stop. He'll have me mewing soon I'm sure.

His fingers and lips leave my body. Now I do moan, feeling bereft.

"Patience" Sid whispers into my ear. I feel his breath wash through me. He grabs the shower head again and I shiver when he opens my folds and rinses me.

After replacing the shower head again, Sid slides down my body leaving a trail of kisses as he goes. I rest my hands on his shoulders as Sid lifts one of my legs over his shoulders. This was my undoing the last time we showered together and I anticipate the same now.

When I feel Sid's tongue on my clit, I almost come undone from that small touch alone. I'm so sensitive from everything else that we've done that I'm unsure I can take any more. Sid doesn't care. He flicks it again and I whimper; I actually whimper. That's my last thought because Sid goes to work with his lips and tongue and I remember nothing else except feeling rushing over me. Sensation after sensation washes over my skin and deep inside of me. I'm lost in feeling. The only reason I don't fall to the floor of the shower as I completely come apart is because Sid is holding me up.

When I open my eyes, I see Sid's eyes boring into mine still dark with desire. I reach down and take him in hand; he's rock hard again. I'm surprised when Sid guides me down so that I'm kneeling in front of him. I was going to do this myself but Sid has never asked or indicated he wanted me to do it before.

His hard dick fills my mouth and I go to work. I slide him in and out, lick up and down and suck at the tip. He doesn't last very long and his body seizes as he climaxes. Sid helps me stand and dunks us both under the water again. He hands me the shampoo and then soaps up his own body. It feels weird now. It's never felt weird before. It's awkward; that's it, very awkward.

After we finishing washing and then dry off, Sid gives me a tee shirt to sleep in and we climb into his bed. We don't touch but curl into our own sides of his king bed.

"Do you work early tomorrow?" he asks.

"No, I'm off tomorrow" I reply.

"Ok, I'll set the alarm for 8am and we'll see what the roads are like."

"Ok" I reply.

This doesn't feel right. It feels impersonal. It feels artificial. It doesn't feel like 'us.'

I can't stop my mind from whirling. I hear Sid's breathing slow and he's clearly fallen asleep while I'm still wide awake.

I wait a while longer then slip out of bed and tiptoe out to the hall. With the door shut behind me, I turn on the light and head into the kitchen where I find my clothes. After I dress, I look for some paper and leave Sid a note.

'Couldn't sleep so I headed home.' I write. What else can I say? Sorry Sid, the sex was great but I'm weird so I left. Ug.

I put on my boots, coat and bundle up for the snowy weather. Fuck it. I can't afford it but I call a cab. I really don't want to stand at a bus stop. With a last look around, I make sure that I have everything and then sigh. This will be the last time I see this place and Sid. I guess we went out with a bang; I can't even laugh at my own lame joke.

I want to leave with a feeling of resolution; but, all I feel is regret.


	16. Chapter 16

I wake up alone. I don't have to get out of bed to know that I'm alone in the condo too. Part of me, a big part, isn't surprised that Cat is gone. I think back over last evening and don't know where it all went wrong. I went to the diner to talk to Cat and figured, with the weather, that we could talk as I drove her home. The change of plans to my place was unexpected but that drive was dangerous.

I think it went wrong when, after I apologized, Cat simply answered "ok." I got mad or maybe frustrated is more apt.

In the kitchen, the minute her hands touched my chest, I was lost and had to have her. I've never been like that before. It was a challenge to remember to be good to Cat too. All I wanted was to take and there were definitely moments when I was only focused on my own pleasure; but, then a little voice would remind me to bring Cat along rather than using her as a means to an end.

I'm not entirely comfortable with one thought that went through my head; I wanted to punish Cat for what happened. It's completely illogical and mean but it's how I felt and probably why I kept her emotionally at arm's length. Maybe it's a good thing that Cat left. I would probably be begging her to forgive me this morning. What the fuck am I doing?

I scrub my hands over my face and wonder where it all went wrong again and probably not for the last time.

Ok, I need to simply think things through. I screwed up. Duper helped me see where I screwed up and, as I think about it more, Cat probably thought I knew more about kids than I really do because Dupe and Flower were helping me. I also realized that if I want a life, and my time off with the concussion told me I need more balance, than I need to make time for more than hockey. So I come to this huge realization and go to the diner to talk to Cat. Then the evening unfolded as it did. Since Cat left, and I don't blame her given how I acted, she must think that this was a mistake. Or does she? I want this to work. I want to see if Cat and I will fall in love. We're already half way there; at least I am. Maybe we date without involving Lizzy this time like Cat originally wanted. Then we'll know if we should take the next step. Flower was right when he said that you go from date one to date twelve with a single mom. Maybe we need to have a few of those in between dates. Ug, I'm going back to sleep. I'll figure this out later.

* * *

I have barely slept. The cab took me home but it took a long time. Thankfully the roads were better but still bad and with lots of snow. I slept on the sofa since Miss Sally was in my bed and woke to Lizzy jumping on me very, very early.

As promised, I am making blueberry pancakes for the three of us. As we eat, I can tell that Miss Sally wants to ask me about Sid but I'm glad she doesn't. She knows not to in front of Lizzy who is currently scarfing up pancakes and telling me about what she's going to do at her swim lessons. We clean up after breakfast and I let Lizzy go watch cartoons after she's cleared her dishes.

"Now that the munchkin is gone, tell me what happened with Sid" Miss Sally says.

"There's not much to tell" I reply. "Nothing has changed. We both want different things and have very different lifestyles. If it was just about me then I could make a lot of compromises for him; but, it's not just about me and I have to think of Lizzy first."

Miss Sally sighs. "Ok missy. You know I love that little girl like my own but you need to make sure that you find happiness too. Lizzy will learn from you what happiness is about."

She gives me a lot to think about and it weighs heavy on my heart. After everything is cleaned up and Miss Sally goes back to her apartment, I settle on the sofa beside Lizzy to watch cartoons. She climbs up onto my lap and I cuddle her in. I anticipated a lot of the worries I would have about my daughter; but, I never anticipated juggling her happiness and mine as separate things. I always simply thought that if she was happy than I would be too. That's partially, mostly, true. I think of what Miss Sally said about Lizzy learning about personal happiness from me and isn't that part of teaching my daughter?

"Mommy?"

I look down at Lizzy and she's frowning. "Yes baby."

"You look sad" she says and looks sad at that thought herself.

First, I feel pride because my daughter just watched Sesame Street where they were talking about emotions. Lizzy saw that and applied it to me; such a smart little girl. It also demonstrates what Miss Sally said and Lizzy is picking up that I'm not happy.

I don't want to lie to Lizzy so I answer "I'm tired baby."

"But you look sad. Do you have a boo boo?"

Oh God, can I say 'yes, in my heart?'

"No, I don't have a boo boo. I would love a hug from my Lizzy."

Lizzy smiles and hugs me tight. These precious moments with my little girl in my arms makes everything better. She smiles again and settles back again to watch Burt and Ernie.

My phone buzzes and I see that it's Sid. Wow.

* * *

I keep rolling everything over in my head again and again until I think I'll go crazy. Finally, I simply grab my phone.

'You ok?' I text Cat.

There's nothing for a few minutes.

'Yeah' she texts back.

'You left'

'Yeah'

'Why'

'Sid, it's over, right?'

Her text gives me an immediate feeling of dread. She still thinks it's over. I guess I didn't do anything to make her think otherwise. Wait! She's asking me not telling me; maybe she's not so sure. How do I answer her?

'What if I don't want it to be over?' I press send and hold my breath.

'You don't?'

Time to man-up Crosby.

'No, I don't Cat. I think we could really have something and want to find out'

It's all out there now. Cat has to decide if this is worth it to her too.

'What's changed?' She asks.

'I don't understand' I reply.

'Essentially you said that you don't have time for us. What's changed?'

'I have Cat. I get it now. We need to figure out how to make it work.'

She doesn't respond. There's nothing from her for what feels like an eternity. I'm about to text again when she finally replies.

'Ok'

'Ok what?' I ask.

'Ok let's try'

I'm stunned and then concerned. 'Ok' isn't exactly a thrilling response. I wonder if I'm pushing her into this; although, the one thing that Cat isn't is a pushover.

'Can we talk today?' I ask her.

'Ok, Lizzy has swim lessons at 1pm. Can you meet me then at the Centre?'

Fuck, today is a game day. I have practice and video, my nap and then the game. I guess this is one of the times when I have to make it work.

'Perfect, I'll be there'

'I'll meet you out front'

'Ok, bye'

'Bye Sid'

Now I need to figure out how the day is going to work; time to get out of bed. Grabbing my phone, I go into the living room and grab my weekly schedule file. No media today so that works. I'll need to make sure that I leave Consol thirty minutes before I meet Cat. Shit, the video session might run into that time. Maybe I can talk Reirden into doing some vid before practice.

I quickly text Kunitz and Dupuis to ask if they can be there thirty minutes early. Next is Reirden. It takes a few minutes but I hear back from everyone and we can do it. Ok, I just might be able to make this work. Now, to get my ass to the rink.

* * *

Lizzy must sense my stress. I've been uneasy and unsure since my texting with Sid. Lizzy has been demanding and needy since then; she always picks up on my mood. I really need to calm down or else I'll make Lizzy and me crazy.

"Are you going to tread water today?" I ask Lizzy as we take the bus to the Centre.

"No" she answers with a pout. Great, 'Moody-Lizzy,' my favourite of her personae.

"Sarah's going to be there today" I tell her trying to lighten her mood.

This does the trick because she smiles and says "Sarah yay!"

Thank God. I would hate to drop a miserable child on the swim instructors even if Sarah is her favourite. We arrive soon after and it's a short walk into the Centre and the pool.

Lizzy loves her swim lessons and is jumping up and down as I try to get her into her suit. At least she's smiling and happy so I work with her jumping and wiggling. Finally she's dressed and I get her out on the pool deck. I take my phone and head back out. I let the pool manager know that I'll be out front if they need me and then head out to meet Sid. I feel the butterflies flapping in my stomach. How weird to be so nervous when we've decided to get back together.

With a deep breath, I head out the front door and look around the parking lot for Sid's truck. It takes me a few moments and I almost fear he isn't showing again when I see him. Sid drives up the front door so that I can easily climb in. I turn to him once inside but I'm not sure what to do. Do I kiss him? Hug? Nothing?

We stare at each other for a moment. He is gorgeous as always. I can smell his cologne and know he's just come from practice.

"Hi" he says.

I smile and reply "hi."

Sid begins to drive away so I tell him "we need to stay here Sid. Lizzy is in the pool."

"Yeah, I'm just going to pull to the end of the lot so we have privacy."

"Oh, ok" I reply.

I wait while Sid pulls into a vacant area and parks the car. We sit there now, both simply looking out the front window.

"Sid"

"Cat"

We say at the same time and then laugh. Some of the tension between us disappears now.

I turn to Sid and say "I'm sorry that I just left last night."

He turns to me and replies "I didn't exactly give you a reason to stay."

"I'm still sorry."

"Cat, last night didn't accomplish anything that I wanted."

"Nothing" I say with a raised eyebrow.

"Ok, we accomplished one thing, several times actually." We both chuckle. "Cat, I wanted to talk when I picked you up. When we did talk at dinner you seemed, I don't know, odd I guess when I apologized."

Yeah, that's something I figured he would want to discuss.

"The situation was odd Sid. I didn't know why you came to the diner. I didn't know how to feel. I only know" I pause here. Do I go all in? What else do I have to lose? "I only know that it hurts Sid. I miss you and that hurts."

I look away as I say this because I feel cowardly. What if he doesn't feel the same?

Sid takes my hand. "I feel the same way Cat. I miss you, I miss both of you, and it hurts."

I look back at him and his eyes are sad but hopeful too. Maybe.

"Sid, there's one thing that needs to change" I tell him.

"I know and I'm trying. Today, for example, I moved a video session so that I could come see you. That won't always be possible but I have to try."

Oops, that's not what I meant. "Sid, you said that you have changed so I trust you that you're trying to find a balance."

He smiles but then it quickly disappears. "What did you mean has to change if that's not it?"

"I don't want to involve Lizzy at this point. She is too attached to you Sid, she loves you, and I need to know that we can and want to make this work before we involve her." There. It's out.

"I'm not going to say that I like it because I miss her too; but, it does make sense Cat and I agree that it's a good idea."

He kisses my hand and, as simple as that, we're back on track.

"You can do better than that" I say and lean in.

Sid takes my lips with his. It is a perfect kiss and a great way to end our 'break up.'

We part and Sid says "I play tonight and then we leave directly for Boston. We'll come home after that game. Let me look at my schedule the next day and we'll get together, ok?"

"Sounds good. I'm working until 4pm that day."

Sid leans in for one more kiss then he drives me back to the front of the Centre.

"I'll text you later" he asks.

"I'd like that" I reply.

I look around and no one is in viewing range so I kiss him again and quickly jump out of the car. As I rush up the stairs, there is an extra spring in my step.

* * *

There are a lot of strange looks being sent my way in the locker room. I'm getting into my equipment before the game, as usual, so I don't know what's going on. Finally I can't take it anymore so I turn to Duper.

"What's up?" I ask him. He just smiles. "Seriously Dupe, what's going on?"

"Do you realize that you're whistling?" He asks back.

"What?"

"You're whistling Sid. Have been since you got to the rink. What to tell me what's going on?"

Oh, now I understand the looks.

"Cat and I got back together" I whisper.

"That's great Sid!"

"Quiet Dupe. I still don't want the world to know. In fact, we're going to keep it from Lizzy for now too."

I look him in the eye now. It didn't occur to me earlier but I should have asked Duper's opinion. He's always been dead on about this relationship.

"That's a good idea Sid. See how you work out, fit together before bringing the kid back in. It'll be better for her but I think it's better for you and Cat too."

"What do you mean?"

"Sid, there's less pressure without the kid. You both have lots of responsibility but you are still young. Have some fun. Get to know each other better. Hole up in your apartment for an afternoon and play scrabble." He wiggles his eyebrows now in a typical cheesy Duper way.

"What are you ladies gossiping about?" Neal asks as he walks to his stall.

"How sick your hair is" Duper says without missing a beat.

They go back and forth with the insults and I retreat into my own thoughts again. I really need to get my head back into game mode and get Cat out of my head. To help, I go back to the change room and take out my phone. One last chat then I can focus.

'I'll get a point for you tonight' I text Cat. That's the first time that I've done that, made a hockey commitment to a girl. I usually keep those things completely separate; my personal and professional lives.

'It better be a goal and not an assist' she texts back.

I chuckle and reply 'I'll do my best'

After putting my phone back in my locker, I head back out to finish my game preparation.

That night I didn't get a goal; I got two. There was additional excitement with each one than simply scoring a goal. I scored each one for her. After the game, before we take off for Boston, I text Cat.

'So ...'

'So what?' She sends back.

'I didn't just get one goal, I got two'

'Oh, did you'

'You weren't watching?' I feel disappointed that she wasn't watching.

'Of course I was!'

Now I feel foolish. Of course she was watching.

'And?' I ask.

'Why didn't you go for the HT?'

First, it's awesome that she knows a hat trick is called an HT. Kinda hot too. Of course that means that I'm getting chirped, via text, by my girlfriend. Wow, by my girlfriend.

'Well?' She asks again.

'Next time' I tell her.

'Ok, safe flight'

'Thanks'

I put my phone away.

"You might as well be whistling" Duper yells from across the plane. I ignore him and buckle up. I know there's a huge grin on my face and I can't help it; don't want to help it if I'm honest.

"You guys are back together?" Flower asks me in a low voice.

I look around and no one is listening to us.

"Yeah, today" I reply.

"That's great Sid. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks. We've decided to have some of those dates that we missed between meeting and doing family type stuff. You know?"

"Does that mean that you're not involving her daughter?"

I nod. "We've decided to keep Lizzy out of it for now. I know I totally underestimated how attached she got."

"That's probably a good thing for now Sid."

I nod and we settle back for the flight. The attendant brings around our dinners and we all eat like we haven't seen a meal in years. It's always like this after a game. If you weigh us before and after a game you would find we've lost five to ten pounds; all water weight. We put it back on right away of course.

After eating, I lean back and think about getting some sleep. My mind won't let me. I look at Flower and he's still awake too.

"How's Stella?" I ask him.

"She's smiling now" he says and pulls out his phone. "Take a look at these."

He shows me pictures of Stella and Vero.

"They are beautiful Flower. I guess she is smiling, huh?"

"V said it was gas but look at her. That's a real smile; non? There's no gas." He says which makes me laugh.

We look at the rest of the pictures, of which there are many, and we soon land.

On the way to the hotel, I text Cat again.

'You awake?' I ask.

'Yeah, barely. Where are you?'

'On our way to the hotel'

'That's a really late night'

'Which is why we nap'

'Yeah, I'll never buy into grown men having naps'

'Ok'

'Don't pout' she texts.

'I'm not'

'Yes you are. If I was there I'd bite that pouty lip'

'You would huh?'

'Oh yeah and I wouldn't stop there'

This is taking an interesting turn.

'Where else would you go?' I ask.

'Mmm, I'm having happy thoughts now' she texts.

'You are crazy!'

'Lol' she texts back. 'What, no sexting?'

'You're really crazy' I tell her.

Looking out the window, I see that we're pulling up to the hotel. For the first time, I want to be home more than I want to play hockey.


	17. Chapter 17

There's a knock on the door so I take a last look around and make sure I haven't forgotten anything. It all looks right so I go and open the door.

"You're doorman let me right in" Cat says as soon as the door is open.

I can't help but chuckle. "Yeah, so?"

"How did he know who I was?"

"I told him that my girlfriend was coming over."

She smiles hugely.

"My boyfriend is very, very thoughtful" she replies and rises up to meet my lips for a kiss.

"Come on in. You must be freezing. I wish you'd let me pick you up."

"Sid, it's only one bus from the diner to here so it didn't make sense. I got door to door service and you didn't even need to leave home."

I shake my head as I help her off with her coat. Cat walks directly to the bay of windows as she always does when she visits. It gives me time to take her in. She changed before she left work. She's wearing skinny jeans that mold to her legs, hips and ass. I can't take my eyes off of her perfectly shaped ass showcased in those jeans. When I finally can move my eyes, I see that she's wearing a loose sweater. She turns around and shows me that the sweater has a very low scoop that reveals the swell of her breasts. Finally, I tear my eyes away from her body to look at her face. Cat's smiling at me knowing exactly what I've been look at and thinking. She gives her head a shake, chuckles and then looks around the room. I can tell that she's taking in all the candles I've set up and the fireplace. That's the only light on in the room.

"Wow Sid. You went all out."

"It's not cheesy?" I ask her.

"Is it cheesy? There is definitely a high cheese factor; but, fortunately I love cheese" she smiles at me.

"Good. Can I get you some wine?"

Cat nods and then walks back to the windows. I pour us each a glass of the Cabernet that I had opened for us.

"Here you go" I say as I hand her the glass. I hold up my glass and say "to new beginnings?"

Cat clinks my glass. "More cheese? I love it" then she sips. "Oh this is good."

I take her hand and lead her to the sofa in front of the fireplace. We both sit down and I pull Cat to my side under my arm.

"Thanks. I developed a taste for wines when I lived with Mario."

"It's really good. How long did you live there?"

"With the Lemieuxs? I moved in when I first came to Pittsburgh. I was eighteen and had never lived on my own. I was either at a dorm or a billet family. It was going to be hard enough to adjust to the NHL without also adjusting to living alone."

"That's nice he did that for you."

"Senior guys on a team will often take in younger players for a year or two. I was lucky that Mario was still playing so he was also a captain and mentor to me too."

"How long did you live there?"

Now I pause. Cat's been on her own since before she was eighteen. This is going to seem very strange to her.

"I moved out almost a year ago. This condo was supposed to be temporary because I bought a house in Sewickley but I ever lived there. I bought it because I thought that I was supposed to live on my own but it never really felt like mine. It was renovated so David Moorehouse bought it. He's the Pen's president."

"So now you've decided to stay here?"

"Actually, I'm having a home built for me in Sewickley; I love the town. I found the perfect land aso I tore down the existing house and have rebuilt. It's not quite done but I should be in it at the beginning of next season."

"Wow, that's great. You'll be able to make it exactly the way you want it. I bet it'll have a wicked man-cave."

Now I blush because she's right. "The man-cave is actually most of the carriage house. There's the main house, a large pool and then a carriage house. My family often comes for long stretches so they can stay there if they want privacy. Or, if a bunch of us are playing games and getting loud then no one will hear us in the main house."

"That makes sense. At my place, I just have to be really quiet" she chuckles.

I hope that I don't sound like I'm bragging. It's so hard to talk about these kinds of things with people who don't have a lot of money. I really don't want to seem like I'm an elitist or snob. That's not how I was raised.

"So you lived with the Lemieuxs for almost seven years?" she asks me.

"Yeah. They have four kids so it was great to be with a big family. I was also able to talk to Mario about anything, anytime I wanted. For the first year, especially, it was invaluable."

We're silent for a few minutes simply enjoying the soft music, candlelight and each other's company. Since we've talked about me, maybe I can ask her a few questions too.

"Cat, we've talked a bit about your past and I know you don't like to focus on the past and growing up in foster care. What about Lizzy's father? Obviously you didn't stay together but why isn't he helping you? If he doesn't want to be a father to Lizzy then to at least help you financially. It's not right that you're in this all alone."

I can tell immediately that I've gone too far or hit a nerve; Cat pulls away from me physically and emotionally. Her entire body stiffens as she takes a long sip of her wine. I decide to pause and let her guide our conversation now.

"Sid" she starts but then pauses. "Sid, I'm Lizzy's mother and father. She doesn't need any more than that and she isn't missing anything."

"Oh Cat, I didn't mean that Lizzy was missing anything. It's just that Lizzy's" I can't say father. "That guy has a responsibility that's solely on you. It's not fair."

She's quiet for a long time. I turn to face her and, cupping her cheek, turn her to face me. Her eyes are sad and I can tell that I've ruined the moment. Shit.

Before I can say anything, Cat's expression clears and she gives me a small smile.

"Sid, I have Lizzy. How can I say that life isn't fair?"

She's right of course. Lizzy is incredible and it's because Cat is incredible. Fair or not, she's made it work.

I need to change to mood so I get up and walk over to my docked iPod. It takes me only a few moments to find the song that I'm looking for and Lady Antebellum fills the room.

I take Cat's glass and place both our glasses on the coffee table. Cat takes my hand and I pull her into my arms. She fits perfectly. Her arms go around my waist and she lays her head on my chest. We sway slowly and I hear Cat sigh softly. It's a wonderful sound; sweet.

"We fit perfectly" Cat says.

I chuckle and reply "I was thinking the exact same thing babe."

I can feel her smiling against my chest now. I can't resist running my hand through her think hair. It's soft running through my fingers. It's soothing and exciting at the same time having Cat in my arms like this with her arms around me holding me tight to her. I get lost in the music, the candlelight and mostly Cat.

I really don't want to let her go but I did promise her dinner.

"Hungry?" I whisper in her ear.

She pulls back and looks up at me. "For?" She asks.

I reply "let's start with food. We'll explore everything else after that"

I lean down and peck her lips then head off to the kitchen.

"What have you ordered for us?" Cat asks.

"I didn't order. I cooked."

Cat scoffs at me. "You did not."

"Seriously, I cooked. There's stew in the crock pot" I reply.

Of course I called my mom for a recipe. I didn't even know what a crock pot was never mind how to use it before I talked to mom.

"I chopped everything and even seared the meat. Who knew you had to sear meet first?"

Cat laughs now. "It smells delicious. I'm sure it will taste even better."

"Go sit down and I'll bring it out" I tell.

"I'll get our glasses."

While she goes out to get our glasses, I scoop the stew into our dishes and bring them and the bread out to the table. Cat is seated and has lit the candles on the table.

"Oh Sid, it smells delicious" she says when I put the bowl in front of her.

Cat immediately tastes and I'm surprised that I'm holding my breath. I really hope she likes it.

"Mmmmm, you really need to cook more Sid. Wow."

The smile on my face must resemble when I got the goal at the Olympics. I'm so excited that she likes it. I sit and taste it myself. It really is good. I owe mom a big thank you for the help.

Dinner is a lot of fun. We talk about the diner customers, practice and Flower's most recent prank on a rookie and Lizzie's latest obsession with Sesame Street. I don't remember laughing this much in a very long time. When we're finished, Cat helps clear the dishes and clean up. I try to stop her but she insists since I cooked.

When we're done, I refill our wine glasses and we go back into the living room. I put them on the coffee table and sit beside Cat on the sofa.

"You really can cook Crosby."

"Ok, truth time. I don't want to give you the impression that I can cook. I was able to make a good stew with a lot of help from my mom" I finally admit.

"Your mom?! You cheated! You called your mom to help you and then tried to pass it off as your own?!"

I shrug my shoulders and try to look sheepish.

"Oh don't try that 'gosh darn' look on me Sid. You tried to pass your mom's stew as your own."

With that last comment, she attacks and discovers something that I've always tried to keep quiet; I'm very, very ticklish.

As soon as I squirm at the first touch, Cat realizes my secret and attacks with more fervor. Thankfully I have more size and weight than her so I'm able to push her back against the length of the sofa. I pin her hands above her head with one hand and push her into the sofa with my body. Her legs instinctively fall open to cradle me there. I push up on my free arm so that I can look at Cat.

Both of our smiles disappear slowly and we're simply gazing at each other.

"Cat" I whisper.

"Yes" she replies.

I brush my fingers lightly over cheek.

"Just 'Cat.' You are so beautiful."

She smiles, which only makes her even more beautiful. I lean in and sip at her lips softly. Over and over I sample her lips and savour her taste. I pull up and lick my lips.

"You're delicious too" I whisper.

I watch her eyes darken and the bright blue becomes deep as the ocean. When I release the hands over her head, I slide mine down her arm slowly and over her side making sure that my thumb flicks over her nipple. She bites her bottom lip and I slide my hand back up and over her nipple repeating the action yet again. She moans this time. To torture us both, I move my hand lower over her waist, hip and then down her thigh. Pulling her leg over the back of mine allows me to push closer to my goal even if it is through our clothes. I push my hips steady and with pressure against hers. There's a groan that I realize is from me.

"Sid" Cat whispers so I open my eyes and look down at her. "Sid" she repeats.

I lean down and kiss under one ear then move to the other side and kiss under that ear. I feel the shiver go through her and my dick twitches in response.

With her free hands, Cat moves them to my ass and pulls me even closer while she thrusts up. I groan again. She moves her hands up and under my shirt and takes my shirt with her as her hands slide further up my back. I bury my face in her neck and kiss, lick and taste every part of it. That's when I feel her fingers digging into my skin; but, part of my mind is uneasy.

"Cat" I whisper into her ear. "Are you sure?"

I pull back to look in her eyes.

"What do you mean?" She looks confused.

"I know we've decided to go slowly with, well, this; does that mean you want to take this slow too? Do you want to stop?"

Her confusion clears up and she places a hand on each of my cheeks to hold my face an inch from hers.

"Sidney Crosby, let me be abundantly clear about two things. First, the go slow plan is a good one and we need to make up for the dates we missed in between date one and date twenty-two. The second thing is very simple: don't you dare stop touching me; ever!"

I stare into her eyes, stunned for a few moments and then watch her fierce look turn into a huge smile. Mine matches hers and I dip in to take her lips.

It's a fun but intense kiss. We both end up laughing and wiggling around. That causes us to roll slightly but off of the sofa. Thankfully I go first so Cat falls on top of me rather than the other way around. We break out into laughter again; giggles actually.

I shift and then stand up taking Cat with me.

She slaps my arm. "Sid, you're crazy!"

If she thinks I've been crazy so far then I need to show her what crazy really looks like. I stoop down and scoop Cat up over my shoulder like a potato sack and head toward my bedroom.

"Sid!" She cries out.

I decide to go with it and slap her ass; not hard but hard enough to hear a slap.

"Sidney Patrick Crosby!"

"Only my mother calls me that Catherine!"

"Well no one calls me Catherine."

In my bedroom, I throw her on my bed and watch as she bounces into the centre. I climb after her and stalk her up to the head of the bed.

"Sid, what you doing?" She asks very slowly.

"You said to keep touching you. That's what I'm trying to do."

She smiles at me again and rises onto her knees.

"Does this mean that you want to touch me too?" I ask her.

She keeps smiling and crawls over to me. We meet in the middle. Without speaking, Cat reaches for the hem of my shirt and pulls it up. Her hands slide up my stomach and chest to raise my shirt. When she reaches my shoulders, I raise my arms and she pulls it right off then tosses it to the floor.

I look back at Cat but she's not looking me in the eye. Her eyes are running over my body and I can feel them like a caress. When her hands follow her eyes, I have to force myself not to throw Cat down on the bed and devourer her. Her small hands lightly trace every muscle she finds. I almost come undone when Cat lowers her head to follow her hands with her lips. Her tongue does send me over the edge. There are small, hot, wet little licks leaving a trail down my neck and then chest. I know that my fingers are digging into her arms but I can't control myself. Actually, I am controlling myself since I haven't simply thrown her to the bed.

Cat's lips follow her trail back up my chest again until we are kneeling flush against each other. I want to feel her skin against mine so I pull her sweater over her head. When free, Cat leans against me and takes my lips with hers. The kiss heats quickly with Cat adjusting the angle to her satisfaction. I love this aggressive Cat. She knows what she wants and takes the lead. It's hot and reassuring; hot for obvious reasons and reassuring because it helps assuage some of my concerns from our last encounter. I still have rough moments when I remember how selfish I was that last time.

Her hands hold my shoulders tight so I slip mine up her back to unhook her bra. Cat pauses just long enough to free herself and then she's pressed up against me again. I feel her nipples tighten against my chest. We continue to kiss with Cat leading the way. I love the way she sweeps her tongue over mine; her lips press and move over mine; her teeth nip at my lower lip and then her tongue soothes. Soon though, it's not enough. I need to feel all of her.

I grab her hips so that she's straddling me and lower her backwards so that I can press against the length of her. Starting at her neck, I kiss, lick and nuzzle her skin. Moving lower, I stop at her breasts. Her nipples are still taut and begging for my mouth. Cat's hands tighten in my hair with anticipation. To torture us both, I flick my tongue over one first and then the other. Cat arches her back trying to push against my mouth. I can't hold out any further either so I close my lips around one nipple and roll my tongue around and around. She lets out a long moan. When I move to the other nipple, Cat moans again. I give it equal attention and then go between the two leaving wet kisses between them as I go.

Cat pulls at my hair so that I come up to her lips again. The kiss is searing, deep and long. Cat's hands slide down my back and then inside my jeans. There's not much room so she slips a hand between us and into the front of my jeans. I'm concerned I'll go off like a teenage so I slide to her side and grab her hand.

"Not yet" I tell her and move my hand to the front of her jeans.

I unsnap them and then drag the zipper down letting my fingers lightly graze over her. I smile when she shivers. God, I love how responsive she is to my touch. I try pulling her jeans down but they won't go. I tug a bit and they still won't budge. Pulling away, I look up at Cat.

"Skinny jeans were a good idea at the time" she says.

I stare at her for a few moments and then we both break out laughing. I fall beside her on the bed barely able to control myself.

Cat slides off the bed to stand beside it and shimmies out of her jeans. I watch her, moving to sit at the edge of the bed, until she's standing in front of me wearing only her panties. I pull her toward me between my thighs. Her hands rest on my shoulders then slide up to my cheeks. As I continue to stare at her, I hook my thumbs in her panties and pull them down. She kicks them aside and then kneels in front of me. I watch as she unbuttons my jeans. Her fingers softly caress me through my shorts. I could explode from that alone but fight it back. She looks up at me and smiles knowing exactly what she's doing to me. She pushes me back onto the bed and I slide toward the middle. Cat follows me. She pushes my jeans down and I help her until they follow hers to the floor. She does the same with my shorts.

When we're both naked, Cat straddles my thighs and slowly slides herself up my body until we're lined up. She leans her body down so that she's fully covering me when our lips meet.

I love the feeling of her soft, warm body covering mine but I roll us on sides facing each other. Slowly, I slide my hand down her back, over her hip and between us until I reach my goal between her thighs. She's soaked, thoroughly soaked, and my two fingers easily slide inside of her. I absorb her moan with my mouth and begin to swirl my fingers around the way I know she loves. He hips tilt and begin to grind against my hand. Fuck, she is so hot.

I continue to work her with my hand and watch her face as I do. She looks so beautiful biting her lip yet still not able to suppress her moans. I've always enjoyed my partners and sex but I love watching Cat as I touch her. It's more than how beautiful and hot she is; she is completely uninhibited and demonstrative. When I push my fingers in again, deep, Cat can't control the scream that erupts from her lips. I quickly switch to her clit and watch her completely come undone in front of me. She's slipped to her back now. Her left hand is by her side clutching at the covers. Her right arm is thrown over her head and that hand squeezed tight. There's a sheen of sweet over her face. I feel her body tighten and she throws her head back as she cums. My hand is soaked from orgasm.

I know that if I don't act quickly then I'm going to embarrass myself. I reach to the bedside table to grab and a condom and return to Cat. I position us and take her lips with mine. The kiss quickly becomes heated and I have to be buried in her. I grab the condom and pull slightly away to glove up.

Before I can, Cat grabs my wrist and says "wait."

Wait? Wait for what?


	18. Chapter 18

I wake up shivering. I'm actually so cold that I'm physically shivering right now; of course that could be because I'm naked, lying in bed and without any covers. I'm so far to one side that I'm almost off the bed. I try to turn around but directly bump into Sid's hard body. I manage to turn onto my back without falling off the bed and can see that, even though it's a California King bed, Sid is taking up most of it and all of the covers. No wonder I'm shivering.

Holy shit! Last night all comes flooding back to me: Sid making me dinner; the fun and tenderness that followed; and then, I almost ruined it all. I made Sid stop after my orgasm and before he could put the condom on. It was on the tip of my tongue so much that I thought Sid could see it if I open my mouth. I love you. I rolled around my head unconsciously at first and then so that I could feel it in my heart. It almost came spilling out of my mouth. How could I possible feel love this quickly? Accept for Lizzy, I've never told anyone that I love them. I've definitely never felt it for a man. Would Sid believe me this quickly? Do I believe myself? I've never felt this before. Is it really love? Shit!

I have to pee so I slip out of bed. On my way to the bathroom, I pick up Sid's tee shirt off of the floor and slip it on. When I'm finished, I head back to the bedroom. There is a little more room on this side of the bed and, more importantly, there are available covers. I slip in and cuddle into the comforter.

I feel Sid shift, slide toward me and then behind me. I could almost sigh as his arms come around me; maybe because it's him and maybe because he's so warm.

"I could get used to this" Sid says behind me. I feel his breath on my neck and shiver.

The words 'I love you' keep rolling through my head. Ok, I need take a leap and trust him. Can there really be love if there isn't trust? Can I really love him if I don't trust him with my heart? My secrets? It's time to start.

"Sid?"

"Yeah babe."

My heart swells when he calls me babe.

"When I was young, really young like seven or eight, it was hard. My mother was either high or looking for her next high. She would bring guys home. I didn't realize at the time that she was hooking for money to buy drugs. I do remember being hungry, a lot. And cold. I only had a coat in the winter because my teachers would buy one for me. My regular attendance at school was to prevent Child Services from coming around to see why I wasn't at school. It was the only thing my mother made sure that I did which was good for me."

I pause now. I've never, ever told anyone about this before. I feel Sid hug me tighter. That support helps me go on.

"I remember she smacked me once because I told my teacher that I was hungry. The teacher had Child Services come by the apartment to talk to my mother. The first time they came by, my mother pretended that we weren't home. When they left, that's when she smacked me and asked what they wanted. I didn't even know who they were at the time. She cleaned up the place, stocked the fridge with food and told me to be good or she would do worse than the last smack.

I was terrified when the Worker came but made sure that I was good. My mother was a great actress pretending to be a devoted mother. She told the woman that I like to make up stories to get attention and that, while we didn't have much, everything that she had went to taking care of me.

The woman bought the whole act and even gave us coupons or something for free stuff. After she left, my mother turned on me, grabbed me by the shoulders and told me that if this ever happened again then I would be sorry I was every born. I didn't know what that meant but I could see the hate in her eyes and was truly scared."

I pause again. I really want Sid to understand me. He needs to know where I come from, not to feel sorry for me, but to understand the choices I made later; if he ever can of course.

After a deep breath, I continue. "She overdosed later that year. I came home from school and she was dead in the bathroom. I didn't know what to do. She always told me that the police were bad men and would take me away to lock me up. She said the same would happen if I ever told my teachers anything too. I didn't have anyone else to tell that she was dead. There was nobody. I shut the bathroom door and kept going to school so no one would 'lock' me up. The apartment started to smell both because I couldn't use the toilet since she was in the bathroom and from her decomposing body.

I came home from school on day three or four, I can't remember, and saw that our apartment door was open and there was a cop in front of it. I heard him say "is that her?" and point at me. I immediately turned and ran but they caught up with me of course. They didn't lock me up of course but that was when I went into my first foster home."

There's more of course but I feel emotionally spent having shared that much. It takes me back to that time which I always try to forget. I'm surprised that I've shared so much but glad that I did. This is the first step to a possible future with Sidney. This is my first step in truly trusting him.

Sid's quiet for the longest time. I wonder what he's thinking about but I can't bring myself to ask. Finally, Sid moves. I feel his lips at my ear. He kisses me first and then nuzzles my neck.

"Thank you" he whispers. "Thank you for trusting me."

I sigh and feel some of the weight lift off of my shoulders. Sid gets it; he understands and doesn't feel any less of me. At least I don't think so.

"It's hard Sid. I've never told that to anyone. I've never shared my past with anyone before."

"I'm so glad that you feel that you can trust me with this Cat. I care about you and only want to know you better."

I lean into his lips and sigh. I feel, well, content. For the first time in my life I feel content, cared for and accepted. It makes me optimistic for the future. We still have a long way to go but I feel good. As Sid slides his fingertips over my skin, I feel really good.

Sid kisses my neck again then settles into the pillow. It doesn't take him long to fall asleep, I hear his even and deep breathing, but it takes me much longer to settle. I can only hope that I don't see pity in Sid's eyes tomorrow. Maybe that's one of the things I feared but he would never hold it against me what happened to me as a child. It's just not in his nature. But, to see him feel pity would be bad too. He wants to understand me and my past; fine. He wants me to show him trust; I understand that too. For him to feel pity would ... I try to put that thought out of my mind. We'll deal with that if it happens.

With my body still sated from earlier in the evening and Sid's arms around me now, I fall asleep.

* * *

I wake up alone and have a bad feeling. Was it too much for Cat? Did she regret sharing her past with me? I listen and don't hear any noise in the apartment and the bathroom door is open. Fuck. I thought we were getting somewhere. Leaning back on the pillows, I consider going back to sleep to avoid the world.

"Damn, I wanted to get back before you woke up."

I look up and Cat silently walks into the bedroom wearing only my tee shirt and carrying a bowl and a plate. She hands them both to me and then climbs into bed.

"You don't have much in your fridge so we're having strawberries, sliced apples and cheese."

She leans in and kisses my lips softly.

"Hungry?" she whispers.

I see the flirting in her eyes and repeat how she answered me last night. "For?

"Let's try breakfast first" and she pops a berry in my mouth. "Then we'll see after that."

I look at the bedside clock and its 8am. I have lots of time before practice but "do you need to be home or at the diner?" I ask Cat.

She arches an eyebrow and asks "trying to get rid of me?"

I quickly push her back against the pillows and cover her body with mine.

After kissing her thoroughly, I say "never. Just wondering what we have time for."

Cat chuckles "I'm not working today and Lizzy knows that I'll be home later."

That definitely gives me ideas. I kiss her lips and then sink into the kiss. It quickly becomes heated.

"Let's forget about breakfast" I say into her lips.

"I'm not hungry anyway" Cat replies.

I get out of bed and pull Cat with me.

"Where are we going?" she asks.

"I like you wet" I reply heading to the shower.

"I'm always wet around you" she replies and I feel my dick respond. Oh yeah, I definitely love her wet.

After our shower, where we eventually did do some washing too, Cat is bundled in my robe and sitting on the bed while I dress.

"I guess I'll have to dress" she says on a sigh.

"I don't need you to but it might be a little chilly outside."

"Ha ha ha Crosby. Very funny."

I walk over and sit on the bed beside her. When I cup her cheek, Cat leans into my palm.

"Thank you" I say.

"Shouldn't I be thanking you? You cooked and hosted."

"No, I mean thank you for sharing your childhood with me last night. It couldn't have been easy and it means a lot. You trust me and I don't take that lightly."

Her eyes soften and then search mine. I don't know what she's looking for but she must be happy with what she sees because she smiles.

"I do trust you Sidney."

Now I smile and kiss her back. I sip from her lips a few more times than groan.

"I have to get to practice or else I wouldn't stop" I tell her.

"Likely story Crosby" she replies and gives me a last kiss before climbing off the bed.

When she drops the robe to get dress, I can't help myself but watch her. She is so beautiful; she's thin but has curves too and she's so tiny. It makes me wonder how I don't break her with some of the energetic things that we do. She sends me a saucy grin telling me that she knows I'm watching her.

I pull my shirt on and leave the room before I decide to do more than watch.

Cat joins me soon after, we dress in our outerwear and leave the apartment. As we drive to Cat's place we talk about our next date.

"I'd like to take you out" I tell her.

"You mean in public?" she asks.

"Yeah, in public" I reply.

"I thought you always said that would be a mistake."

I look at Cat and she looks quizzical but not angry or upset.

"When we first started dating but now" I shrug. Maybe she's not ready for that yet.

"Ok" she says.

"Ok?"

"Yeah Sid, ok. Let's go out."

I feel her hand cover mine. I guess she could feel my nerves. I didn't even know that I was nervous about this until now. I've never been 'out' with someone in Pittsburgh before. In Nova Scotia I have but the places I go to know me. In Pittsburgh, unless I go to a restaurant with a private room, I'm going to be seen and so will she.

"I want you prepared Cat. I'm not being arrogant. There are times when I get recognized and it takes me a while to sign autographs and take pictures with people. I don't know what will happen if they know that I'm out with a woman and that the woman is my girlfriend. It could be intense."

I wait to hear Cat's response. This is one of those times when I wish that I wasn't who I am and that I could go out with a girl like normal guys do. But I'm not and that can't be changed.

"Sid, are you sure you're not over reacting?"

Great, she doesn't believe me.

"Cat, do you remember when you came to the locker room with Lizzy? Do you remember who had most of the press around them? I couldn't even get down the hall. Or at the luncheon with all of the players?"

"Oh, yeah. You were mobbed, weren't you? It's like that out in public too?"

She's getting it now. "Yeah, it can be. It's not like that all of the time. There are places that we go where it's ok but then there are times when it is a mob scene too. You can't tell which it will be on any given night. I don't want to scare you; but, I think I owe it to you to be honest. My agent has always advised that I be cautious when dating openly in Pittsburgh."

She's quiet, very quiet. I start feeling uneasy about the whole thing. Maybe I've scared off myself rather than warning her.

"Cat, maybe we should wait" I tell her suddenly unsure.

"Sid, my hesitation is for Lizzy. Are you thinking there could be reporters and people stalking me and Lizzy? How crazy could this get?"

Shit, now I've too overboard and really worried her. "Cat, I don't think it would be like that, really. In fact, I think a reporter already knows that I'm dating you and he hasn't said or written anything. Shit, I don't know what I'm saying. Maybe I just want to keep you to myself."

She's quiet again until I pull up in front of her apartment. I stop the truck and turn to her. It takes her a few moments until she turns to me.

"Are you going to ask me out properly?" I see the sparkle back in her eyes. I guess she's decided.

"Cat, would you like to have dinner with me tomorrow evening? I'm playing an afternoon game. I could pick you up after Lizzy goes to bed."

"I would like that very much Sidney."

I know I'm grinning at her now. The past twenty-four hours have been incredible. We had dinner, sex, she spent the night and told me more about her past. I'm still incredibly curious about Lizzy's father but Cat will tell me when she's ready. She's already letting me in more. I'm going to put away all concerns about the press and enjoy dating a beautiful, smart woman who I care a lot about.

"So I'll pick you up at 7:30?" I ask her.

"Sounds good" she replies and leans in.

I cup her face and linger over our kiss. We've been together for the longest time since dinner but I'm already missing her and don't want to see her go.

"You have to go to practice" she whispers against my lips.

"I know. I don't want to leave you."

"You'll see me tomorrow Sid."

"Ok, have a great day."

"I will. Thank you for a wonderful evening."

We linger again and finally Cat pulls away from me and dashes out the door. Once inside the door, she waves at me and then continues. I drive away and don't even realize that I'm whistling as I go.

It's a quick drive to Consol so I get to the rink on time. Heading into the change room, I say hi to guys as I go and then greet Duper.

"You got laid" Duper says to me.

"How do you know?" I ask him.

"You have a beautiful glow about you Sid."

"Fuck off" I tell him.

"Sid got laid?" I hear Geno ask.

This might be the right time to test the waters with my relationship.

"I've been seeing someone" I tell Geno and wait for his reaction.

I feel all activity in the room stop and all eyes turn to me. After a deep breath, I turn around and see all of the guys in the room are looking at me. What's that expression? In for a penny, in for a pound?

"Ok, let me have it" I say to them.

No one says anything for a while. There's no movement at all either.

Finally, Kuni says "that's great Sid."

I see the other guys nodding too.

"Thanks Kuni" I reply.

Everyone goes back to what they were doing and the chatter starts again.

"What were you expecting?" Duper asks me.

I guess that's a good question. I've never had a girl during the season so I really didn't know what to expect. The guys are always ragging on each other so I assumed they would be the same now.

"Is it that girl from the diner?" Neal asks me.

Wow, Nealer is actually being, sincere?

"Yeah, that's her" I reply.

"She's hot!" Now that's the Neal I know. "She's really hot Sid."

The guys slowly trickle out of the change room until I'm left with Geno.

"She's good girl?" Geno asks.

This is the most Geno has ever said to me about a girl; either someone he's dating or someone I'm dating.

"Yeah G. She's really great." Ok, time to take the next risk. "She has an adorable little girl."

Geno looks surprised. "Little girl?"

"Yeah, she has a three year old who is so great; sweet and beautiful."

Geno nods to me and asks "you like little girl?"

"Yeah. I never thought about finding a girl who has a kid but ..."

I leave it there and wait to see his reaction.

"You happy?" He asks.

Leave it to Geno to boil it all down to a simple idea.

"Yeah, G."

"Good" he says and then walks out the door.

I guess it's as simple as that.

* * *

I find myself humming all day. It really feels like Sid and I have passed a milestone. We feel in sync with each other. It was still scary as hell to tell Sid about my past but it went even better than I thought and makes me encouraged to tell him more. Maybe he'll respond well to the whole story.

"Mommy, mommy, mommy!"

"Yes sweetie" I reply.

"Look mommy" she demands.

I look over and see that she has been very busy while I've been making lunch. It looks like she's been trying on everything in my closet; everything that remotely fits anyway.

"Lizzy. What has mommy said about going into my closet?"

Lizzy starts to pout now. She still tries to pull the pout and wining to get out of trouble.

"Lizzy, I asked you a question. What has mommy said about her closet?"

"No go" she whispers.

"That's right. You're not supposed to go into mommy's closet. So what do you have to say?"

I wait for a few moments while she pouts and stares at her feet.

"Sorry" she whispers.

"Thank you. Now come here and give me a hug."

I bend down and she shuffles over. Lizzy stops in front of me and leans in not quite wanting to give in and offer a hug.

"Ok, Lizzy, now go to mommy's room and put everything on my bed. We can hang it all up after lunch."

Lizzy pouts even deeper but turns and shuffles off to the bedroom. I manage to wait until she's left before I chuckle. I grab my phone.

'You won't believe it, Lizzy just tried on most of my clothes, all at once' I text.

It takes a few minutes but Sid texts me back.

'That's funny'

'Sure it's funny to you. Not your clothes'

'True'

'How's practice?'

'It was good. Going to work out now'

'You work out as well as practice'

'Yeah, have to keep up'

'As someone who benefits from it, keep that body up'

'Any area in particular?'

He's so funny.

'I'm very fond of your shoulders' I tell him.

'Really? Ok'

'And your abs too'

'Ok'

'And you ass, of course, that fine ass'

'How long do you want me in the gym babe?'

'Ha ha ha, as long as it takes babe' I reply to him. I love when we flirt. It's so much fun.

'Ok, gotta go then'

'Bye'

I finish up lunch and put it on the table.

"Lizzy, lunch is ready."

She comes running out of the bedroom and to the table.

"Yay!" She says as she climbs up on her chair. It looks like she's put the last incident behind her. That's good because I'm in a great mood. Sid does that for me.


	19. Chapter 19

I wasn't able to watch the game because I don't want Lizzy to focus on Sid again. She's hasn't mentioned him in a couple of days so watching an afternoon game could bring it all back before we're ready. Instead we played Hungry, Hungry Hippos and had a tea party. Lizzy was in a good mood and it was so much fun. Miss Sally joined us for dinner and the three of us enjoyed ourselves with Lizzy making us laugh the whole time. Miss Sally cleaned up while Lizzy and I went through our bedtime routine. When she's down, I run to the bathroom to get ready for my date.

"Lovely" Miss Sally says when I enter the living room.

"Thank you" I tell her.

"Will you be home tonight?" She asks me.

"Definitely" I tell her. I don't want to take advantage of her staying with Lizzy.

"Cat, stay with Sid if you want to and I'll stay here. You know that I love staying with that little girl."

"Ok, I'll see what Sid thinks and I'll text you."

"Have fun dearie."

I say goodbye and rush to meet Sid. When I get to the lobby, he's not waiting which surprises me. He's usually early. I check my phone and there's no message from him. I start to wonder if he had something come up. Thankfully, a few minutes later, he drives up so I rush out and jump into the truck.

When I kiss his cheek, I notice that he hasn't turned to kiss my lips so I meet his cheek. Something is definitely wrong.

"Hi Sid. What's up?" I ask him.

"Nothing" he answers quickly and drives away.

I've never seen him like this and I'm unsure what to do or say.

"Sid, there's definitely something wrong. Talk to me."

He's quiet again and just keeps driving.

"Sid, please."

He swerves suddenly and pulls into an empty parking lot. He grips the steering wheel hard but still doesn't say anything. I try to be patient and wait him out. He takes a few deep breaths before it rushes out of him.

"We lost and I haven't had a point in three fucking games."

Oh, it's hockey. I guess I should have at least checked the score even if I couldn't watch the game.

"We haven't gone through this Sid. I don't know what to say or do."

He's quiet again and I begin to worry that I said the wrong thing. He's clearly frustrated and upset but it's not about or aimed at me. Ok, let's try a different approach.

"Sid, would you please drive to the diner?"

He looks at me surprised but shrugs, starts the car and drives in the direction of the diner. I text Tessa.

'I'm 5 mins away. Will you do a take out of the meatloaf, mash potatoes and salad, two portions please?'

'Will do girl. See you soon'

We get to the diner in just over five minutes.

"Give me a minute and I'll be right out."

I jump out of the car before Sid can say anything.

When I get to the front counter, Tessa has my order ready for me.

"Thank you so much Tess."

"You're welcome sweetie. I figured that you are with Sid so I made sure there's an extra portion."

"I appreciate that. See you tomorrow."

I wave and head out to Sid again.

"Ok" I tell him as I buckle up. "Let's go to your place. I have dinner" and I point to the boxes.

Sid simply stares and I don't know if he understands me. When he looks up into my eyes I smile and nod. Sid starts the truck again and we head off in the direction of his place.

When we're up in Sid's apartment, he sheds his jacket and rolls up his sleeves. We both go into the kitchen and I plate our dinner. Sid gets us drinks and sets the table. It feels odd to do all of this in silence but it might be what he needs right now. I wait until we're sitting down and eating before talking again.

"You need to talk to me Sid. Tell me if you want to talk about the game, if you want to just ignore it, what do you need?"

Sid puts down his fork and stares at his dish for a moment before he says anything.

"I don't know what to say either" he begins. "I haven't dated during the season and don't know what to do. I'm pissed, frustrated and disgusted by how we played, how I played too, but; I don't want to take that out on you. Look" he gestures around. "We were supposed to go out to a nice restaurant and here we are, again, holed up at my place. This isn't what I wanted."

I feel all of his frustration pouring out now. I still don't know what to do for him but at least he's talking to me. I go with my instinct and walk behind him. I slide my hands over his shoulders and hug him close. It takes a few moments but I feel when Sid relaxes into me and lets me hold him.

"It might not be what you want Sid but it is what you need" I whisper into his ear.

Sid sighs and then reaches around slowly to pull me down to his lap. I wrap my arms around him and hold him to me again. Sid leans down to rest his head on my shoulder and nuzzle into my neck.

"I should be able to fix this but I just can't." His voice is muffled into my neck.

"All by yourself Sid?"

"I'm the captain."

"Of a team. You may lead and score but the responsibilities aren't yours alone so don't shoulder all of blame alone."

He's silent now and for so long that I want to ask what he's thinking. I decide to wait him out. Finally, he pulls away so that he can look at my face.

"When did you get so smart?" He asks.

I peck his lips and reply "I don't know about smart but I do know about you. You'll figure it out Sid. It might take some time and don't give me the crap about a shortened season. You'll figure it out. Now, I'm still hungry, can we finish dinner?"

He chuckles and lets me up.

"I'm hungry now too."

I walk back to my chair and we continue dinner only Sid's mood is better even if not completely light.

"What are some of the things you've done in the past to get out of a rut?" I ask.

Sid shrugs and replies "various stuff; new skates, new stick, practice more or practice less. Have sex." On the last words he smirks at me.

"Oh, would you like me to get you a new stick?"

That comment gets a genuine chuckle from him.

"I will make this up to you" he tells me, serious again.

"What's to 'make up?' You said that we would have dinner together and we're having dinner together."

"Ok, fine, but I'm still going to take you out for dinner soon."

"I'd like that and we will Sid. You know, you don't need to hold things back from me. I know you're thinking about the pot and the kettle but we're figuring out this relationship together. That means we need to talk about what we want from it and what we need from each other. Ok?"

He smiles and says "ok."

I look down at my plate and see that I've finished eating. So has Sid so I pick up the dishes but Sid stops me.

"Let me do this and you can get comfortable in the living room."

I take his suggestion and move into the living room. I turn on the gas fireplace and get comfortable on the sofa. Sid joins me soon after and pulls me to his side. We both stare at the fire.

"Cat, you never talk about your father?"

That seems to come out of nowhere but I guess we did just say that we need to talk. Sid was going to start asking more questions as I share my past with him. At least this one is easy.

"I don't know who he is or was. My mother would tell me different things depending on what story she wanted to weave at that moment. He was a teacher or a college student. She even once said that a priest raped her. She may not have even known or remembered who he was if she was high."

"Cat, I'm so sorry that you had to through that, had to live that way."

This is exactly what I wanted to avoid; pity. I look up at Sid.

"I don't want you to pity me Sid. That would be the worst thing you can do. I'm not a victim. I've worked for everything I now have and I'm not a victim." It comes out a little fiercer than I intended but it's what I mean.

Sid cups my cheek and says "can't I feel sorry for the little girl and still admire the woman you've become?"

How does he know the perfect thing to say? It makes me think and he's right. One has nothing to do with the other.

"Ok, you're right. Thank you" I say and lay my head on his shoulder.

"Sid, there's a lot in my past that I need to tell you and it's going to take time. I trust you" I say. Ok, time to take another step. "I think I'm falling in love with you Sidney."

I feel him take a deep breath. I know that I'm holding mine.

"Good" he says. "I think I'm falling in love with you Cat."

I feel my heart warm and that warmth spreads throughout my whole body. Sid just said that he's falling in love with me. I know that I'm falling in love with him. How did this happen? How did I get here, right here, in his arms?

"Sid, have you been in love before?"

I didn't realize that I was going to ask him that until it was out of my mouth. Now that it's out there; I guess it's out there.

"I don't think so Cat. I've cared for and even loved some of the girls that I've been with but, in love with someone, no."

That's really interesting. He's going to be 26 this summer and he's never been in love.

"What about you Cat?"

"No, I've never been in love. Actually I've never told anyone that I love them except for Lizzy."

Sid leans down. "Hopefully we'll change that soon" he whispers in my ear.

I feel that warmth throughout my body begin to heat up.

"I haven't thanked you" Sid says.

"Thanked me for what?"

"Thanked you for making me talk about what was bothering me, about the game. You helped me put everything in perspective. We will come out of this scoring slump like we always do. Thank you."

"You're welcome. I want to support you Sid like you support me."

"Let's just say that we support each other. How about that?"

"Ok."

We stay where we are quietly enjoying the silence and each other. I notice that it's after 8pm. There's probably a game on that Sid wants to watch.

"Sid, do you want to take me home? Then you can watch a game or, most likely, a few games."

"Aren't you staying the night?"

"Oh, we didn't discuss it so ..."

"Do you want to stay?"

"Sure I do. It's just, um, ok, I have my period." I'm mortified that I had to tell him although I guess I shouldn't. I mean, I'm a woman, he knows that I have periods.

"We don't need to have sex every time we're together Cat. We'll call it a sleep over."

That makes me chuckle as he meant it to of course.

"Ok, we'll have a sleep over. I didn't bring my tooth brush."

"Well, I actually got an extra one. It made me think, do you want to keep a few things here?"

That surprises me. While I've never had a relationship like this before, I always thought that guys didn't want this kind of thing; that they freak out over so much as a hair brush.

"Yeah, that would be good Sid. I wouldn't have to keep clean undies in my purse."

"Good."

"When are you going to put a game on? I'm sure that there are a few you'd like to watch."

"You don't mind?"

"Of course not. Go ahead."

I can feel Sid smile before I see his face. He grabs the remote and immediately finds a game.

"Do you want to change and get comfy? I can give you some sweats."

I want to say no so he doesn't have to bother but it's too tempting.

"Yeah, that would be great."

We both head to the bedroom; Sid gets me Pens sweats and then changes himself. The pants are almost twice as long as my legs and the shirt sleeves hanging too.

Sid starts laughing. "You look like you've been swallowed by the warm up gear."

I look down and I do look rather ridiculous. Sid helps me roll up the legs and sleeves.

"Ok, I think that you can walk now without tripping over yourself."

Still laughing, we both head back to the living room and settle onto the sofa together.

The next couple of hours go by quickly. Sid flips between three games and answers questions that I have. He focuses specifically on one game since the Pens are playing them next. He points out the big defense man who will shadow him during the game.

"You mean they assign one guy to play against you the whole game?" I ask him.

"Usually a team will assign one guy, yeah" he replies.

"But he's so big" I say.

"They usually are."

"How do you get away from a guy that big?"

"Sometimes it's good that someone is playing me directly because then I can pass to Kuni or Duper. Usually, if they're really big, I can simply get away from them."

"Because you're faster?"

"Yep, I'm usually faster."

"Cool."

"You guys should come to another game."

It was an off handed comment, I can tell, but it makes me wonder about Lizzy. Are Sid and I at a point where we should tell her that Sid and I are dating? Is this as serious as I think it is? Sid seems to feel the same way. I don't know what to do. I've never done this before and I chose so badly last time and Lizzy got hurt.

"You are extremely quiet. Are you worried about being recognized or something at the game?"

How do I explain this to him after how wonderful the evening has been? I guess I need to follow my own advice and communicate.

"Sid, it's just that you said 'you guys' meaning Lizzy and me."

It takes him a moment but he understands.

"Oh, yeah. Sorry about that."

I can feel the weirdness come into the room.

"Sid, I don't know what to do. I've never been in this situation before. I believe in this relationship and a future for us. It really worries me still about Lizzy. What do you think?"

I don't know who is more surprised by my question; me or Sid.

"Sid, I know she's not yours but, I guess, if we're in this then I want to include you. What do you think?"

He's quiet for a moment then says "I don't know. I've never had to deal with something like this before. Ok, let's think about it. We still don't know about the future, right?"

He sounds so unsure of himself. Is it because he's not sure about the future or something else?

"Sid, we don't know for sure of course but we do know that we want one, right?"

He smiles at me now. "Yeah, yeah we do."

"Ok, so maybe we should do something, the three of us" I hesitantly suggest.

"Yeah, I'd like that. How about the next afternoon game? We can have dinner afterward."

Wow, we need to do this more often; talking instead of sex. Maybe not instead of but more talking is definitely good.

"That sounds great. Lizzy is going to be so excited."

We go back to watching the game again. It doesn't take me long to fall asleep.

I wake up feeling Sid's lips on my brow, then my cheek and then my lips. Instinctively, I reach up and hold him to me so that I can lengthen our kiss. It is very sweet and soft. When we part, I open my eyes and look directly into Sid's.

"I guess I fell asleep" I say.

Sid chuckles "yeah. I hated to wake you up. Let's go to bed."

He rises and pulls me with him. I turn off the fireplace while he turns off the lights and then, hand in hand, we head to the bedroom. Sid gets changed while I brush my teeth; he's left out a pink toothbrush and my own toothpaste tube. When I'm finished in the bathroom, I head back into the bedroom and see that Sid has another game turned on.

"They aren't done yet?" I ask him.

"This is a western conference game. It's Chicago and Anaheim. Chicago hasn't lost in regular time yet. If they can keep it up, they'll be the ones to beat."

"Besides you" I tell him.

He smiles at me and heads into the bathroom.

I cuddle into the bed with the comforter pulled up to my chin. I must get one of these. It is so comfortable and warm. It's almost like sleeping in a cloud and a hug rolled into one.

"Are you in there somewhere?"

I chuckle at Sid's question.

"I am but good luck trying to get me out. I may never leave."

"I'd be ok with that" Sid replies as he climbs in beside me.

"You're a funny, funny man Crosby."

Sid climbs in and drags me to him under the covers.

"Are you going to let me keep some of these covers tonight?" I ask.

"What do you mean?"

"Sid! The last time I stayed over, I woke up naked, on the very edge of the bed, shivering without covers."

"Oh."

"Oh? That's all you have to say is 'oh' when you banished me to the edge of the bed?"

"It wasn't intentional Cat."

"I didn't say it was intentional but it still happened. At least this time I have your shirt on so I won't be buck naked if you're a cover stealer again."

"I'll try to share. Ok?"

"Ok."

I lean on Sid's chest and can't help but sigh. It feels perfect.

"Something wrong?" He asks.

"No. Everything is perfect. That's why I sighed."

"Oh, good."

He hugs me closer to him.

"I have another idea" Sid says.

"I'm sure I know your other idea but we can't."

"Very funny. My idea is why don't you and Lizzy stay over here after the game and dinner?"

Oh. I don't know what to say to him. As much as I love the idea it feels too soon. We'll have just gone out together for the first time as the three of us.

"I guess the silence tells me what you think" Sid says a little deflated.

"Sid, I love the idea just not on that day. It will be the first time the three of us are together. It will be the first for a lot of things."

Sid sighs this time. "I guess you're right."

He continues watching the game and I continue to think this through. What is the downside of sleeping over at Sid's? I'll be in his bed and Lizzy would be in his spare room. We wouldn't be having sex so it's not like that's an issue. She's really too young to read something into a sleep over like that and I can position it as a sleep over with our friend Sidney.

"Ok."

"Ok what babe?"

"Ok, we'll stay over."

"Really?" Sid's voice goes up a notch when he asks that quite clearly surprised.

"Yeah, I think it would be really nice."

Shortly, I fall asleep dreaming of Lizzy, Sid and I living together in this apartment.


End file.
